confused192 Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 So, I know that I post about older men pretty much all the time...sorry. But lately I have really been wondering what older men look for in a woman. I am 26 and am quite mature for my age. I have a great career, am highly educated and do not enjoy the club scene or any of those things I did in my early 20s. I have also been married (and subsequently divorced) so I understand the inner-workings of marriage and issues that can arise. However, I do not have children and in some ways, I am just beginning my life. I do not necessarily have the experiences of a woman in her 30s or 40s. So in your experiences, what do older men look for in a woman to date? Link to post Share on other sites
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 Older men, generally, are not looking for party girls. We look for stability, and loyalty, and intelligence, and honesty. I'm 28, two years older than you, but I can say this: I'm pretty well burned out on the "party girls." I want a decent, loyal, intelligent and down to earth chick. Link to post Share on other sites
Author confused192 Posted March 15, 2011 Author Share Posted March 15, 2011 Well that's good to know...I am certainly no party girl. Link to post Share on other sites
Disillusioned Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 In two words, platonic relationships. Any moron can obtain sex, but if you're one of the singles who'd just like some non-sexual friendliness with someone of the opposite sex, well TOUGH!!! Link to post Share on other sites
East7 Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 I am in my mid 30s and my dating age range begins from 25 What are older man interested in ? Well...they will appreciate your career and your maturity. Men that are past 30 don't like silly girls who can not keep a conversation, no matter how pretty they are. Also men at my age are more keen to settle and don't like much games. So an older man will check if you are marriage material or not. But instead of asking what older man expect, ask yourself what you expect from men. Link to post Share on other sites
Nexus One Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 (edited) I'm 29 and similarly to when I was younger I now still focus on looks, personality and intelligence. Lately I've noticed that the latter two are gaining in importance. Don't get me wrong, looks aren't becoming less important to me, but personality and intelligence are things that will still be there when we both are old and wrinkly. I've read some research from the Kinsey Institute, which is an authority on relationship related research, and in a paper of a 40 year long study they mention that 10% of all couples will stay in love(in a crush/infatuation) with each other for the rest of their lives. Those couples in my opinion have found the holy grail. So basically that's what I'm aiming for. I want the real thing. I want something meaningful. Edited March 15, 2011 by Nexus One Link to post Share on other sites
Cee Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 My male friends in their early to mid 40s are very much attracted to women in their 20s. They are looking to settle down and some of them want families right away. They are highly intelligent and prefer to court a woman through conversation instead of boozy flirting. Although, I suspect they wouldn't mind an alcohol fueled flirt session if it came their way. I've known some incredibly immature older men. One of my exes was 16 years older (he was 48/I was 32) and it was the most horrible experience of my life. Don't be blinded to think age means integrity, character, or maturity. Really, age means very little. Link to post Share on other sites
TouchedByViolet Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 Older men like younger girls I think you should be asking what quality men like. I never understood the strong attraction women have toward men older then them. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 Older men like this. Link to post Share on other sites
fishtaco Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 Older men like younger girls Hahaha! I was going to say this. You beat me to it! Link to post Share on other sites
Trovador Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 Most men like younger girls... Older men like young girls... Seriously, I don't think we older men are looking exclusively for fresh meat, to put it rather crudely... of course, there are always predators, but I'd like to think that when we find a girlfriend 10+ years our junior is because we portray a sense of stability and even wisdom... if those girls wanted a tumultuous relationship there are plenty of young men to hook up with... What I've liked in my young girlfriends has been always intelligence and maturity, so this old geezer can feel he's treating with an equal, nor a student, or apprentice or an intern... looks don't matter too much to me, as my years have taught me to appreciate more substantial qualities... Of course, one would want the whole package, but one just can hope and anyway, youth is the only make up women need... Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 I'm a your "older guy". I was 25 when Ronald Reagan was still president so you do the math. What I can say is perhaps the most important thing is consistency of identity--I can't love someone who doesn't even know herself and changes the rules of what flies with her from one day to the next. A mature woman will know herself and know that her half of the trust equation--the part that she has to earn--is a matter of her showing that she is one person that can be trusted to do the right things under the stresses that come up in relationships. This doesn't imply that everything she does has to meet with my approval--it just means there has to at least be a picture of one identity there that I can learn to know how to bring whatever joy I'm capable of bringing to her and giving her what ever space she needs when that what she needs too. That's how I am--I not a deck of cards with a bunch of different faces on each one that you don't know what you're going to get when you shuffle me. I'm someone who has constants that won't change. We can keep doing thoughtful things to change our appearances or try some differeing pastimes and ventures, but we can't NOT know each other--I won't risk betrayal of trust again. Even if that means going it alone forever. Link to post Share on other sites
Author confused192 Posted March 15, 2011 Author Share Posted March 15, 2011 Thanks so much for all of your replies. I agree with you, TouchedbyViolet, that age doesn't necessarily equate to quality. I guess that would be a more accurate descriptor for what i am looking for. But I am also looking for someone who pretty much has themselves figured out...they are who they are so take it or leave it. That is really appealing to me. I also like the confidence that older men seem to have, I find that to be a real turn on. So I guess I am describing a particular type of man...and these traits tend to be coupled with older men most often in my experiences. Link to post Share on other sites
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