proactivedreamer Posted March 12, 2011 Posted March 12, 2011 My ex and I have been talking about every 2-3 days. We often flirt, reminisce, laugh, and it just feels natural again. Keep in mind, he broke up with me. We spoke today, and it was nice. I asked him as we were hanging up if talking to me was helping him move on and he said no. I told him it wasn't helping me move on either, and that maybe we shouldn't talk so much. He said it was a mistake and he didn't mean to bother me. I said you are not bothering me. He said " I don't understand how you would want to meet me in New York later in the summer but you talk about moving on-its confusing. I said " I don't see how they are connected, by then we would be moved on-I think." I asked him why he was talking to me so much, and he said he didn't know. I said what do you mean you don't know. He said, Stop asking me stupid questions. I said I am just trying to understand what all the contact is about. He said he saw me online and wanted to talk. So, I guess I am feeling a great deal of confusion because he is the one who said we shouldn't contact each other, but he is the main one initiating contact. I know we still feel strongly for each other, and I guess if I am honest, I don't want to move on. He always tells me how beautiful I am and funny and blah blah. Is this his way of stringing me alone, does he think I am hoping for reconcilation, despite the fact that I have never hinted at it?
Stilicho Posted March 12, 2011 Posted March 12, 2011 its very confusing, i know, but hes probably 2nd guessing whatever happened and trying to keep you on the hook in case he decides to run back, honestly, just lay everything on the table and see how he reacts, tell him how you feel, and if he doesnt reciprocate, go full NC.
TakeMeasIam Posted March 12, 2011 Posted March 12, 2011 Stilicho's spot on. The reason he's dangling you on a string/keeping you on the back-burner/throwing you breadcrumbs is - because he can. He says 'jump' you say "how high?" He's playing you, and he knows that when he contacts you, he has you exactly where he wants you. He knows why he does it, all right. But he can't articulate it. And if he did, and could, he would say - "Hell, this does my Ego no end of good! I dump you, yet every time I call, I can hear you practically falling over yourself to get back with me? I dig this attention - I still got it, and you want a piece! Way to go. You have to go complete NC, even if it's to ensure you salvage and maintain your Dignity, Pride and Self-esteem. Never go NC to engineer or stimulate a reaction from the ex. Always go NC for yourself, only yourself, and in order to move on, not move back.
2010_Sorry Posted March 12, 2011 Posted March 12, 2011 In reading your phone call correspondence, it's pretty clear that he really doesn't want to move on... but he is not saying it. This guy is immature when it comes to relationships... as he is still playing games.
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