jalamenda Posted March 11, 2011 Posted March 11, 2011 So I'm going to try and detail my whole situation with this girl. I met her back in October through a mutual friend of ours and we had talked a little bit. In January, I ended up asking her out and we went out 3x over a three week period. When we first started dating, she lived in DC (I live about an hour south in VA) and then, by the 3rd week she had moved to Baltimore. I went up there for our 3rd date and it was by far the most perfect evening I'd ever had. We didn't sleep together, but we had a very intimate evening. I felt like i was beginning to fall for her after that night. We both made it very clear that we liked one another very much and made loose plans to hang out the following Sunday, the day before V-Day. That week, we texted back and forth a lot and talked early on in the week. I had called her on Thursday and she texted back saying she was out with friends and she would call me later, we ended up texting back and forth late at night. The next morning she sent a text apologizing for flaking on calling me because she'd fallen asleep. I told her I'd call her that evening to set up plans for Sunday. I called her twice that night and left a voicemail and then waited til about 6 on Saturday when I sent her a text telling her I'd be around 2-ish Sunday and to let me know if it wouldn't work. She texted back saying Sunday wouldn't work, I asked why and received a message back saying that things are complicated with her right now, she really likes me, thinks i'm great but is trying to recover from a weird year and doesn't want to drag me into. She likes me, but needs time to herself before she screws up another relationship and she apologized saying that she didn't want to hurt me, even though she imagines she did (which she did). I told her that I understood and if she wanted to take things slow or have me wait, I'd be totally willing. I waited for about 5 days and then she called me to apologize, basically just reiterating what she had texted and then, what sounded regretfully, suggested that we should be friends. I know, the dreaded "F-Word." I'm no stranger to it, but from the way she sounded, I really have not wanted to give up hope on this girl because she's everything I've ever wanted and I know that she likes me. I talked to our mutual friend, and apparently she had an uncomfortable living situation with this guy she was living with in DC who I guess had feelings for her and made her feel really uncomfortable, up until she moved out. That and I believe she had gotten out of a long-term relationship in the past year. The week following, I hadn't heard/talked to her. I sent her a couple friendly text messages, received responses, and then in last text message I sent, I ended with asking her "how've you been?" I never received a response. It's been about 2 weeks since that message. I've gone out on a couple of different dates with girls, but I'm constantly thinking about this girl. I really don't know what to do. I'd like to think I could transition to being friends with her, but I still have really strong feelings for her (even though she did dump me 2 days before valentine's day....who does that, especially when they like a person?) that and I've tried doing the transition from dating to friends before and I usually just end up getting hurt more in the end. My friends think I'm nuts for having hope. It's been over a month since I've seen her and all I keep thinking about every day is the last time I saw her. I'm really curious about what other people might have to say. I know it might be over, but I really don't want to just give up so easily. Should I try and enter a friendly conversation with her and see if she may have any feelings still or should I delete her from my phone and my Facebook and do what I can to just move on?
Confusedalways Posted March 11, 2011 Posted March 11, 2011 time to give it up. I feel so bad for you, but clearly- she is not interested in you, at least on a romantic level. I'm not sure how being her friend would benefit you. You sound like a nice guy- move on and find someone who will treat you right, return your phonecalls and stop with the games. I'm continually baffled by the number of women I read on here that seem to go out with a man a few times and then claim to have a complicated life, issues, etc. It's like, why bother going out in the first place? I digress- your friends are right. This chick is hopeless. I'm sorry.
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