aeion Posted March 9, 2011 Posted March 9, 2011 So Ive liked this girl for about 2 years, the only reason i never asked her out before was because i had a gf during that time. Anywho, so i finally wrk up the courage and we ended up having a really nice dinner. didnt kiss that night. Second date was valentines day, and again we had a great time together. Finally kissed her goodnight. Keep in mind that she and i see each other quite often because of school. And at this point i start to show a lil affection in public (i.e working her back to her dorm and kissing her on the cheek. She shys away... I ask her if that wasnt cool and she replies that dating is just new to her so she isnt used to that. Third date: Just a casual movie, afterward asked her the "so when ppl ask what we are doing what do i tell them" question. She says "dating". Now a couple days later i hit her up and tell her that i really had a great time friday. She replies she wanted to clarify what she meant by dating: she beleives that its happening a lil too fast and that we need to talk more before she nows how she feels about me. I tell her that i never assumed we were "together" (which is true) just that i thought she wanted to keep seeing me. She replies ok cool, im glad we are on the same page. Later that night i ended up running into her for class and i give her a hug goodbye, but she stopped and looked like she wanted to kiss... didnt happen (still kicking myself this morning) Im just really confused.... I understand where she is coming from, but at the same time... 3 dates and one kiss is hardly moving fast to me. Im willing to take this as slow as she wants but she never really initiates anything. I always hit her up first to talk for example. .So im feeling a lil discouraged to keep asking her out when she couldnt even tell me that she likes me... I dont know, i really like her but im not feeling the affection in return... but shes down to still date? any advice? i have NO IDEA HOW TO PROCEED
Cee Posted March 9, 2011 Posted March 9, 2011 My gut is telling me that this is a courtship situation, where you have to take things slow. That she needs to be worked up the point where she'll be really into you. I suggest activity dates, rather than traditional dates. Going on little adventures will build common ground. If she's into geeky stuff, then go to comic book stores or go buy t-shirts. Go window shopping and joke around. If she's into the outdoors, go hiking, beach combing, rock climbing, canoeing, etc. I'd like to plug laser tag, go karts, and amusement parks as excellent activity dates. (At least, I love that stuff). Since you are college students, you probably don't leave campus much and have little money. Your adventures might be exploring a building or section of campus. Or going to an exhibition or concert. Or go to parties and dance. The list is endless. I would make this as enjoyable for you as possible. Even if you get friendzoned, you have had fun and gotten a lot of dating practice.
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