Sugarkane Posted March 9, 2011 Posted March 9, 2011 I've been seeing a friend of a coworker during the summer. We both had bad breakups last year, so I had finally met someone else that knew what I had been through. I knew that he eventually had to go back home interstate at the end. He is doing further study. So I thought that would be the end of it. But then he contacted me, saying that he wants me to fly over to see him. I thought he was joking to begin with. But it was no joke. It has been a few weeks since he left. He keeps nagging me to move in with him. I've never moved let alone interstate or lived with someone before, so it would be a big thing for me. He doesn't seem to understand this. I feel torn what to do. He's not the usual type that I go for. I think we lack chemistry. Nobodys ever asked me to move in with them before. I don't know if I want to do it, coz I'm unhappy with my life. I feel like I need more time. He's given me a altimatum to book a flight by the end of the week. Or he'll go NC. Any advice?
Author Sugarkane Posted March 9, 2011 Author Posted March 9, 2011 Being dumped and insulted by text last year, by my ex, hasn't made me that ositive about another relationship again.
Renewed Posted March 9, 2011 Posted March 9, 2011 How long have you guys been together? Did you talk about moving in together before he moved? Do you love him?
Beeotch Posted March 9, 2011 Posted March 9, 2011 This doesn't sound like a good situation and you've said it....lack chemistry, not your type, wants you to move in, you're not sure. I'd say: say NO and keep it moving. He may be hurting and rebounding and just wants a quick fix and to fast forward this relationship into something more serious than it should be at this point. Many people do that after a break up, find someone new and rush to make it official and move in and all this but after a while the fog clears and they realize the truth that they hurriedly jumped into this new relationship as a bandaid....then things fall apart. Seen it with the ex, the guy I am currently "talking to" told me he did that with his ex and regretted it, and countless other people do it. If someone loved/cared about you and wasn't basing things off of selfish emotions they would not be forcing such issues. You sound annoyed with him and not at all inlove or happy....trust yourself and let him move on. I am sure you won't regret it. You already KNOW the truth. Heal yourself and give him the space to heal himself for real and don't allow him to use you or compromise yourself against your better judgment. When you're ready you will find another man, build a relationship, and do things in a way that works for you and supports your well being versus this fly-by-night-ultimatum type scenario.
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