GreenPolicy Posted March 7, 2011 Posted March 7, 2011 1. Don't ever go into a relationship expecting things to work out. A woman can leave at any time, even if you're fundamentally a good boyfriend and treat her right. She might not communicate any problems/dissatisfaction she has, and you might not have any prior warning. So always be mindful that the decision to stay with a person is renewed every day, and don't ever take it for granted. It could end at any time. 2. The common reasons guys get dumped are lack of ambition, smothering/clinging/needy/doormat behavior, or neglectful/comfortable behavior. 3. Don't ever discuss marriage or engagement until you've been with somebody for at least a year. In the 1-2 year range, then you can start talking about it. At that point you SHOULD be evaluating your partner for a long-term match. Before then, you run the risk of raising expectations that are never met. 4. Don't ever put all your happiness eggs in a relationship basket. If you do that and a woman leaves, you have precious little to fall back on. You must always have a life outside of your partner. You can't expect another person to complete you, just complement you. You can't ask another person to be responsible for your happiness, only add to it. When you have a life that is not dependent on having a SO, then a breakup will never shatter you because you have plenty to fall back on and sustain you. Not only that, but having an independent life makes you more attractive to a woman. 5. Be grateful that you have the opportunity to pick up the pieces and move on. There are a lot of people out there that would trade their problems for yours in a heartbeat. 6. Don't ever base your self worth on what another person says, thinks or does. 7. A big heart can lead to a big hurt. But don't ever let go of that big heart. Don't let grief turn your heart to dust where you become unfeeling and uncaring. 8. Relationships are risks. When you decide to trust another person, you are putting yourself in a vulnerable position. Your partner could wind up hurting you. But you have no choice but to commit 100 percent and give the relationship your best shot. Nothing ventured leads to nothing gained. 9. Don't ignore red flags.When you encounter them, run before you fall in love. 10. Whatever you did to get them you must continue to do to keep them.
brokendreamz Posted March 7, 2011 Posted March 7, 2011 Bloody hell mate. Did you write that for me? I wish you'd given it to me a couple of years ago! Number 4 is especially poinient at the moment. Ever heard the sun screen song? I reckon you should release this as a single! Perfect advice, got any more? Please??
Stilicho Posted March 7, 2011 Posted March 7, 2011 damn, all around great thread. especially this 1. Don't ever go into a relationship expecting things to work out. A woman can leave at any time, even if you're fundamentally a good boyfriend and treat her right. She might not communicate any problems/dissatisfaction she has, and you might not have any prior warning. So always be mindful that the decision to stay with a person is renewed every day, and don't ever take it for granted. It could end at any time. such a great point. i wonder how many of us have been victims of our s.o's lack of communication, and therefore relationship breakdown.
Layzie89 Posted March 7, 2011 Posted March 7, 2011 Words of wisdom well received brother. Thanks for this GP.
happiness0421 Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 7. A big heart can lead to a big hurt. But don't ever let go of that big heart. Don't let grief turn your heart to dust where you become unfeeling and uncaring. 8. Relationships are risks. When you decide to trust another person, you are putting yourself in a vulnerable position. Your partner could wind up hurting you. But you have no choice but to commit 100 percent and give the relationship your best shot. Nothing ventured leads to nothing gained. Great post; thank you so much. #7 and 8 are so true...it is easy to give up and not want to give 100% the next time you find yourself in a relationship, but you have to. Relationships are some of the hugest risks you will ever take in life. Even after the heartbreak of them being over, though, you still need to carry on and keep that 'big heart'!
silvermane187 Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 Perfectly sums up what I've learned in the past 6 months.
Fufu Posted May 2, 2011 Posted May 2, 2011 Love this, this relates well to female dumpees as well. I adore this, Don't ever put all your happiness eggs in a relationship basket.
Vitai Slade Posted May 4, 2011 Posted May 4, 2011 I wish I would have known #2 just a couple months ago. I was clingy and smothering with no great aspirations or ambitions. :/
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