Is it normal to be this unlucky in love?! Always loving those who don't want me

[Love_is_Pain]

I'm 24 and i know to most thats young but I feel like I've been through alot in the world of love.

 

Since a young age I have always been promiscous (sp?) & have loved LOVE. I had several parent teacher conferences in elementary school for being too boy crazy. In high school I was in a 3 year relationship that ended in a restraining order bc he was abusive. I got over THAT relationship by jumping into another relationship right after which lasted 2 years. Then in my first year of college I slept around alot always looking for love. Had one Friends with Benefits & I always wanted more....didn't get it. Did another FWB but this time it worked out. After 3 months of an official relationship I became pregnant. We moved in together. I was in love with the father of my child but I was very very needy. We were together for about 4 years. He left me a month before we were going to move into a new home. I was a MESS! I was so dependent on him & I was psychologically "effed" up after that. He moved into the new home & I continued to stay living at his parents house (still there) I immediately started dating while struggling with depression & a crap load of other stuff. Dating put me on a high when the attention was on me again. I continued sleeping around & dated ALOT. I put myself in another FWB that lasted a year and a half (just ending 2 weeks ago) During the FWB I had 2 boyfriends that both just up & left me. I'm talking can't get ahold of them...gone like the wind w/ no explanation. Now, I was only with them to get my mind off the FWB but it didn't work. I fell in love with the FWB & I just left him because I need to move on with my life.

 

I'm alot more mature now & realize the mistakes I made in the past. I'm more independent & have my walls up. It's apparent I used Sex as a way to get love & I'm so tired of searching for love. Everyone says I should get out and meet new people because I've been stuck on this one guy for so long. I want too but I'm afraid of repeating my past. I don't want to keep looking and I'm so tired of being heartbroken all the time. It's really hard for me not to become emotionally involved with someone. Where do I begin? What do I do? What advice does anyone have? I feel like Love hates me. Why do I love people who don't want me? What is that about?

[proactivedreamer]

I think I can relate to you, in regards to giving a lot of love and not feeling like I am receiving the same amount in return. I often get lost in my relationships with men and find myself sacrificing a great deal to make it work. I think the key thing to remember when falling in love is not to lose yourself in it. I find myself on the fence right now about falling in love again-although its nice, I sometimes wonder if it's worth the heartbreak if it doesn't work out. I think its a question of whether there is more risk than reward, you know? My most recent ex was of high caliber, he is good-looking,he has a great job, he is well traveled, likable, funny, sweet, independent, he is everything I wanted, and now its over. I don't want it to be but he said we have to move on, so as much as it hurts I can't sit around waiting for him to realize that maybe we should really give it a try. I lost a bit of confidence with this one, and I know I am not ready to meet anyone right now. This break up is still fresh, and I just want to be alone for awhile before I try this love thing out again. I hope that you come to this realization that you are going to be okay and life will be grand if you want it to be. Love will always be around...

[depplover_1980]

Love Is Pain? Wow, your chosen username says it all, huh?

 

I have 2 questions for to answer:

 

1. Can you tell me your best attributes?

 

2. What are your personal ambitions?

[Love_is_Pain]

Love Is Pain? Wow, your chosen username says it all, huh?

 

I have 2 questions for to answer:

 

1. Can you tell me your best attributes?

 

2. What are your personal ambitions?

 

Yeah, I guess I relate love with pain. I wish I didn't have to have such a negative viewpoint on that.

 

1. I guess my best attributes would be that I am extremely ambitious and a go getter. I am also very commited when I am in a relationship-loyal and loving. I'm very easy going and suppportive. I've experienced a lot and got the party/club scene out of my system a while ago. So I can enjoy myself without having to get wild.

 

My worst features would be that I have trust issues and do get jealous. In the past I was needy and naggy but I learned that pushes people away so I have learned to express myself correctly.

 

2. My own personal ambitions are too succesfully work in the film industry with a stable job as a makeup artist. I work alot but nothing with a steady income. I manage 10 kiosks in 5 malls, driving around mall to mall. I also work as a freelance makeup artist , just graduated cosmetology school and teach classes at a makeup school. My focus has been my career but at the end of the day all I want is someone to call and be by my side. I have a child. I have baggage. I have no time but I make time for the ones I care about most. I have always felt happiest in a relationship. Where do I start? What should I do? Where am I wrong?