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Have we been caught but nobody is telling him yet?


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Posted

Okay, MM and I are part of the same social circle. A few weeks after his brother had us all over for a party, he actually told MM that he was getting questions about us from his wife's friends (the brother's wife). We've been trying to figure out what we might have done to look odd to anyone there, since we were totally casual, as we always are unless we are behind closed doors...we're both extremely cautious.

 

Today, nearly two months later, his brother's wife posted this: "a wise (something) doesn't (something) with another (something's) (something). I can't help but wonder if we were somehow actually caught, though me and MM aren't together often and I haven't seen this woman since that event. Our communication is entirely password-protected and there is no chance that anyone saw anything. His wife hasn't let on that anything is off between them.

 

Am I reading too much into this?

Posted

Sounds like somebody saw something. That FB post might not be about you given the time that's gone by, but someone saw you two exchange a look or picked up on a vibe or saw you two emerge seperately from a similar location when you exchanged a quick kiss or hug or whatever....but then, part of the whole affair thing is that you could get caught right? 9 times out of 10 ppl do get caught...either that or someone fesses up - no telling which comes first. But it does sound like someone saw something and now there's been talk to fuel the fire that was started by it.

Posted
Am I reading too much into this?

 

hopefully not

Posted

Why are you two still sneaking around? It is obvious neither one of you respect your marriage or your partner.

 

Be happy that it is out in the open. Now you two can stop sneaking around, stop lying and stop controlling your respective marriages by all the lying you two do.

 

I would think you would be very happy that it is all coming out. Isn't that what you want - to be with the MM?

Posted

I once worked in a small office where two of the people were having an affair--both were married (but not to each other obviously :sick:). It was so obvious even though they were trying not to make it obvious at work. It wasn't like they were accidentally touching each other or talking to each more than normal for an office environment. When d-day hit I remember the girl/OW saying, "I don't know how people knew here at (company name). We made sure we acted normal here." Duh, it was so obvious to the rest of us in the office.

 

Point is, people always figure it out...those casual, objective observers.

 

Think about it...AP/MP are often mentioning the sparks and the incredible connection they feel with their affair partner. Anyone with an ounce of relationship experience themselves is going to see that "incredible connection" from an outside perspective--something about body language, glances, tone of voice, etc. gives it away.

 

Carrie, if you're done with the A, then hopefully it will all die down.

Posted

I agree with FO; why do you care? Why are you afraid of getting caught?

Posted

People aren't stupid and can pick up on certain energy, glances and looks between you two.

 

Don't be surprised if they all know or are very suspicious.

Posted

It seems to me that you want people to find out. You are only engaged; he is married, he has the most to lose. So you want his wife to find out but not to have to be the one to tell her? These are rather small incidences to me, I think people may suspect/talk but not actually know (I don't think the FB thing was about you two at all-- just sounds like paranoia on your part to me), but you are reading into it because part of you wants people to find out. Just my take on it... to me it sounds like a lot of invented drama. If you want to be with him, just tell your fiance. Either way, tell your fiance. :) Good luck.

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