stallion1987 Posted February 28, 2011 Posted February 28, 2011 Well just recently my girlfriend broke up with me after 10 months. And I do not know why this has happened and what to do next. We met at the end of college and immediately fell for each other. Well we graduated and decided to continue the relationship after we went to our respective home towns. We live two hours apart. At the beginning of the relationship, we seen each other a lot. It was great too, we did all kinds of stuff together and really loved each other. But then we both got jobs and only seen each other on the weekends. We could talk about anything and be comfortable about it. She has been in more relationships that me but she said she has never met anyone like me and this is the best relationship she has ever been in. From talking to her, her past relationships were not very good (verbal abuse, being cheated on). So everything is going good up until about a month or so ago. She started acting different towards me. She seemed like something was bothering her or that she was bothered by me talking to her. This would happen while we are apart (through texts, phone calls, etc.) but when we got together everything seemed great. She loved our time together and would feel good about it for awhile. Then we wouldn't see each other for a week or so and she would revert back to that same behavior. Well eventually I had to ask her what was bothering her and she spilled her guts that she didn't feel like we used to. That she doesn't think our relationship is where it should be at 10 months. She said that she feels herself being mean towards me and resenting me for no reason. She says that something is different but she cant explain what that is. So after some lengthy phone conversations and text messages she has told me that she has had this feeling for the month or so. I did notice some difference in her behavior but only when we are apart. Also, she broke up with me over the phone but said she didn't want to. She was keeping this stuff inside and couldnt take it any longer. She said that she would feel good when together because I was so great but then fight herself about it. She also said that she loves me and that I am the greatest guy she has ever been around but cant keep doing this because she thinks she will hurt me. She said that spark we had before isn't there and does not think that will change. She has said that she does feel it when together and then it does away again. I have tried suggesting working on our relationship to try to make it work. I tell her that we had nine great months together and that we should work to get back to that point. But she refuses to hear me. I bring up the tremendous times we had and she just wont listen to me. I even suggested taking a break but she wouldn't have it. So now I don't know what to do. Give her space, even though she didn't ask for it or do I continue to talk to her about this. Some other points about our relationship: We hadn't had sex since January because of the circumstances of the distance (not a choice). The sex is always great and passionate. She has even told me that she loves that passionate feeling. I feel like she is missing that intimacy and that is affecting her feelings about us and our relationship. She wears her emotions on her sleeve and I can always tell when something is wrong. Example:Two days before we broke up, she calls me six times that day just to chat. I can tell she is happy, she is cheerful and wants to talk, even if its just minor mundane things about what we are doing. So I feel good about our relationship on this day. Fast forward to the next day and she acts moody towards me as soon as she wakes up. She is distant and I can tell she is feeling that resentment towards me again. This is caused by no fault of my own (and she even told me this, she does not know why it happens) So, in conclusion I try to ask her about all of those good times, about a few days ago when she loves to talk to me. I try to tell her that something is definitely different and that we should try to fix it but she refuses (and I know logic doesn't work in these situations). So now I am stuck and conflicted as to what to do. I have told my friends all this and some suggest just giving her some space because they believe that she will come around and realize that this is a mistake. While others say I should keep talking to her in order to keep myself in her life and thinking about me. I need some advice....is it the distance that is killing us? What should be my next course of action?
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