rajcs25 Posted February 28, 2011 Posted February 28, 2011 Twist and Turns, This and That, Lots of Things going on. Ups and Downs Ok, I want everyone to read this and provide me Input with Heart and Mind so that i make Correct Decision in Life by using Heart and Mind both.. I knew my Girlfriend from 6 Months. We decided that we will get married early this year. In January i told her i need some time. She gave me ultimatum that i should marry her or she will go see other guys. There were few Red Flags in Relationships. At that time, she was not even willing to discuss things and was rushing too much. Do it or else...... She was escaping from important issues. We Broke up in January I called her on Valentine's day, but by that time she had started looking for guys as her biological clock is ticking as we both are in 30's and she was on a date with one of those guys. Of Course she does not love him. Thurday night she called me to say thanks about something small, i just forwarded her landlords' email to me asking her for rent .. I called back saturday morning and she was going to go to movie with one of those guys. I had a miserable day. After miserable day she met me in night after she was done meeting with that guy and the whole day yesterday we were together discussing how we can make things work out She has improved from earlier, as now she is listening to my concerns and not showing her back which she was doing earlier. But lot of things needs to be fixed. But again she brings up every few minutes that i need to make decision faster Folks, How to tackle this the best way. I know there are red flags, but there always be red flags or not in some or other relationship. Yes it could be that 5 months from now i find someone great i can be happy with. But this is my 3rd Girlfriend. I already had 2 Breakup's in the past and things went in wrong direction. One of them i was married briefly and than divorced. Things could be wrong in my thinking too. And at the same time, yes there are quite some big redflags with this girl. I want time from her. She does not even look like a beauty queen but i dont know how she managed to talk with 4 guys and 2 already proposed in 1 month. He wants to get married fast. I am going nuts on what to do. I am not able to get any direction. How do i ask her for genuine time to make this work. Whats the best way to have her stop doing what she is doing rushing and give me time. And whats the best way for me to proceed and what to do Folks, anyone of you who get time, please read and respond to me and advise me as i need all your help to make a decision. I have to make decision, but i believe you'all have several experiences and can suggest me things and may be it could lead to a solution for my worries Thank you everyone
Author rajcs25 Posted February 28, 2011 Author Posted February 28, 2011 Folks, Any help would be greatly appreciated
2sunny Posted February 28, 2011 Posted February 28, 2011 she's a controlling bit*h. if you want a life of sheer hell with a woman that calls ALL the shots - then marry her. she wants what she wants and she's gonna get it - doesn't matter if it's you or someone else = she's gonna get it no matter what! feel special now? i don't think so! there will be NO peace and/or serenity when you ALLOW any woman to force her will on you - ever! there's no balance if you allow her to treat you like a doormat - which is what she actually shopping for. two choices = sign up for a life of hell - or RUN! i suggest RUN! don't even look back.
Author rajcs25 Posted February 28, 2011 Author Posted February 28, 2011 It makes sense what you are saying. But why i go back in that direction In this month of NC, i tried to do many things, but felt more needed than earlier now. i dont know what to do. I may not find aperfect woman. But one day even i will be in her situation, giving ultimatums to women, marry me or else i will have to move forward as my biological clock is also ticking and i am getting depressed after years of drama with relationships i dont know what to do she's a controlling bit*h. if you want a life of sheer hell with a woman that calls ALL the shots - then marry her. she wants what she wants and she's gonna get it - doesn't matter if it's you or someone else = she's gonna get it no matter what! feel special now? i don't think so! there will be NO peace and/or serenity when you ALLOW any woman to force her will on you - ever! there's no balance if you allow her to treat you like a doormat - which is what she actually shopping for. two choices = sign up for a life of hell - or RUN! i suggest RUN! don't even look back.
Mcnulty Posted February 28, 2011 Posted February 28, 2011 If someone was holding a shotgun at my head with a 5 second timer, I'd run like hell! She's trying other guys...desperation if you ask me...is she late 30's? If not, why the panic in her part? She has to respect you her partner and your wishes, that's what relationships are about, mutual respect, yes? Don't be held to ransom if you're not ready, think about you in all of this.
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