Letting Go/Moving On from someone you love.. and whats best.. friends or no friends..

[seanmathews3]

So girlfriend and I broke up a week ago.. long story short, dated for 5 months and had a good relationship.. her story is she kinda felt the feelings plateau and she says she wants things to go back to how they were when we first dated.. it seems a part of her still wants this but something in her head is fighting against herself. we talked about being friends and re building the friendship and working towards something but it'll be that hard..

so im by far started falling in love with her and she is my first love. i keep fighting for her no matter what the situation is.

 

im just wondering how to let someone, you find to be soooo amazing and have such a big part and impact in your life and that person being "your kind of girl" in every single way possible... go. we have a good time hanging out, talking, doing things together, and our sex life is by far amazing.. how do you just let someone like that go? i know i cant change her feelings...

 

my only options are..

 

move on without being friends with as little contact as possible so she realizes what it will be like with me out of the picture.. hoping for something to happen (i see this as she will either like or not like having me out of the picture.. its a gamble either way)

 

or

 

move on, start over and rebuild friendship.. with hope of something happening.. (its just the being friends thing i don't want her to get used to and end up having no hope at all for something. no guy likes the just friends thing)

[turokturok5]

everyone on this forum will encourage you to do NC (no contact) like you said it'l give her the opportunity to live her life without you, and experience what its like. If it sucks, if she feels theres something missing then she'll come back to you, so you have to act like you dont want her as a friend. If you do on the other hand become friends with her, your most likely to become a safety net, for when she can't find another boyfriend or when she needs someone to fall back on after a failed relationship, or you'll stick by her untill she loses all feelings she has for you and forgets you even exist, so personally i would stick with the no friends option. Im going through what you are - torn between those two descisions, im kind of thinking that maybe shes thinking she wants me back, but since i haven't been talking to her, she may think i have moved on, which wants me to take on the friend option. But then again, i need to think about what im thinking, how to sort out myself and figure out what i did wrong in the relationship, instead of putting her first.

[huskers11]

My ex and I are more than likely be friends again sometime because we do have quite a few mutual friends. But right now we definitely are not close to being friends because there is still alot of hurt and anger from the breakup. My suggestion is to give it some time and move on! You need to find you again, the you she was first attracted to! Right now, you are not that person and she isn't the person you fell for either. If you are able to start over as friends and have it lead to lovers again, the opportunity will still be there in a few months. Right now, take this time to evaulate the relationship, forgive yourself/her for the failure of the relationship, and become you again!