sweetblubrry Posted February 28, 2011 Posted February 28, 2011 Even shorter… please I need advice Story: Broke up 4 weeks ago. Great relationship, no fights or major issues. Together for 7 months and we work together. Break up was a bunch of lame excuses (friends say I’m different, blah, blah) and it came out of nowhere. He was bawling and I don't even think he knew why he was doing it but just because he felt like he had to. Did NC for 4 weeks straight away besides the times where I saw him at work and would casually say Hi and walk away. A week ago Sunday I worked with him. I was friendly but distant and he kept coming up to talk to me. I was short with him and went back to what I was doing. He asked me about interviews, job prospects and was genuinely concerned (I guess got from fb). After 3 1/2 weeks of no talking, he is all the sudden so concerned with my life? The next day I ran into him after work and he sat down next to me on the bus. He was again being friendly. asked me when I was moving.... I said 2 months and he's like if you need help moving just call me and I will help. What the heck? So I asked him if we could talk about what happened a month ago. But more for myself because I felt like I never really got an answer. He completely opened up to me. Does feel happy with himself or his life (career-wise). Feels like a failure. I found out from a friend that he tells everyone he graduated college when he really didn't. He feels so ashamed that he dropped out. He also brought up how he just doesn’t trust anyone…. friends, family, relationships, coworkers, etc. He said he has no idea he just doesn’t. He is also unable to let anyone in… because he is afraid of getting hurt. He is one of those types that says he doesn't care what others think... but I think he is terrified of judgement. He is so scared at work of others judging him cause he broke up with me. Found out he is seeing a therapist and started seeing one when we were together. Other issues came up… I realized he has never said no to me in our relationship… he just can’t do it for some reason and ends up with double plans and has to lie and make up an excuse. It’s mental, really. Told him I've accepted his faults and imperfections, and I am not his past exes who hurt him by spreading rumors and lies (he was really hurt by this). His friends care and worry about him and he dismisses it saying they are wasting their time when they could be concerned about other things. I asked him if he clears this up, would he consider a second chance someday? He said no ones ever given him a second chance and he doesn’t want to promise anything cause he doesn’t know what will happen in the future regarding where he will be. We parted, but he initiated a hug and hugged me closely for a good 20 seconds. The next day, worked together again. OMG. He was SO friendly and flirty with me. Felt like when we first started dating again. He literally followed me around at work and tried talked to me every chance he got. Even others noticed this! He would joke around and be annoying to me like a little kid who has a crush. We would have playful arguments. I just don't get it. His behavior confuses me so much. Someone even asked me if we were back together! I don’t know what to do but I am still not contacting him. No texts/calls yet but he reaches out to me at work. I still love him and I don’t know what I should do. I want to support him but I also don’t want to be too much of a friend because that will hurt me. WHAT IS BEST IN THIS SITUATION IF I WANT HIM BACK EVENTUALLY?? I feel that NC will hurt because obviously he needs support. But I also don't want to be hurt.
Author sweetblubrry Posted February 28, 2011 Author Posted February 28, 2011 ???? Someone please help. I've posted 4 times now.
Author sweetblubrry Posted March 2, 2011 Author Posted March 2, 2011 Well it has been 5 days since that flirtacious day at work and no contact. Ugh why are guys so confusing? I'm lost....
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