Miss_G Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 I was friends with my ex before we got together. We had a friendship which, in hindsight, was based on fancying one another and falling out because the other was seeing someone else, etc. However, we did hang out and see one another and talk ALL the time. We sort of just 'fell' into be more than friends and 4 years later we now have a one year old child and had just moved into our own home and were talking marriage. I had lost my job due to company liquidation when I was pregnant and could find no more work. I finished University, had our son, cared for him and attempted to return to work. I struggled though and found ex was making out that I just didn't want to work and wanted to live off him. Things became strained, I found his parents intrusive and eventually it all came to ahead and a few times I called things off with him. I always came back to him. Unfortunately, after several horrendous arguements we split and when I tried to make up he didn't want to. He's made a point of this, saying he's sick of grovelling and he's 'hurting'. It's been 6 months since that day but we have been on dates, been intimate and even gone to parties today. There have been incidents I won't go into it but they ruined our chances of getting back together. Since Christmas, ex backed off. When I questioned him he said that he didn't want a relationship with anyone and not just me. He said he was having a 'midlife crisis' and just wanted to be on his own. An incident with his parents led to them losing contact with the baby and ensure this was the case, ex and I started going out with the baby. Things went well, although ex maintained he wanted to be 'just friends'. Eventually, we started getting flirty, he was being a bit 'sexy' and I asked him again if there was 'substance' (ie, wanting to get back or work on things) to which he said "I don't know, I'm still hurting". I asked him only a few days ago and he said he doesn't want to get back together AT THIS MOMENT. However, his parents and I are back on good terms and they are now seeing baby. Ex came and asked if we were going out tomorrow as planned to which I said there was no reason now. He said that it was good for the baby. I told him if there was no reason then I was cutting contact altogether. He was very sad and went very quiet. He was very upbeat when discussing our outing. He asked me to contact him and let him know if he wanted to go together or cut all fully. I don't know what to do. I feel so happy being friends but I do get hurt because I want more. I'm hoping he will change in his feelings. If he really is UNSURE then surely being happy and having fun could change that! I just don't know what to do. I'm so hurt because I don't believe his feelings have gone. I can't see my future without him.
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