yellowhibiscus Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 I really, really, really hate dating! It has been 4 months since my last relationship which was a 2 year thing. I'm horrible at dating and I hate the superficial crap you have to put up with at the beginning. I met someone amazing and everything was super (we talked everyday, I met his dad and friends) but now I find out that he isn't ready for a serious relationship and I know he is seeing other girls. I know he has every right to (and so do I), I just hate all of the gray areas. I can't even come to see anyone else because I am just ga-ga over this guy and I feel like I would be betraying my feelings. Well that's my rant! Does it get easier??
2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Hate when you go on a date and you know instantly you are n't really into them and have to sit and be polite for a bit before exiting. I met a girl and said I had to go after the first drink, I thought she should have noticed I wasn't into her but she was like do you want to go to another place - had to say no sorry but nice meeting you and that. I hate having to do that to people but better doing it now than 3 months down the road! 2011
SingVoice Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 I hate dating too. It's a pain in the ass. And the thing about online dating that I always say is a pain is that you never know how many other people they are talking to. So it's easy for them to just "meet someone else."
2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 I hate dating too. It's a pain in the ass. And the thing about online dating that I always say is a pain is that you never know how many other people they are talking to. So it's easy for them to just "meet someone else." True they could be stringing you along for "fun" and make you think that they are interested when they are on the other hand setting up a shagging session with mr superstud lol! 2011
runner Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 i would say so, but only if you shift your perspective on it. if you go into it with this urgent need to be in a relationship then you may end up feeling burnt more often than not. instead, focus on what makes you happy now, as a single person, and date new people simply for the fun of it, without expectation. and yes i realise how this (the shift) is all easier said than done; but think about it. another idea from the OP worth thinking about is not getting attached too soon with new people. you never really know where things will go, or how people truly are, until you both give it time.
jane100 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 i would say so, but only if you shift your perspective on it. if you go into it with this urgent need to be in a relationship then you may end up feeling burnt more often than not. instead, focus on what makes you happy now, as a single person, and date new people simply for the fun of it, without expectation. and yes i realise how this (the shift) is all easier said than done; but think about it. Yep, easier said than done, but I agree its the only way to go. This is essential when you have to deal with SO many flakies, especially online. You know guys who sent you good emails and sound really interesting and then disappear without trace a few days or a week later. The thing is not to take it personally, probably everyone suffers from it - am I right?? Someone tell me???!!!! The next hardest part for me is making the what happens after you meet someone you are interested in. Although I have looked at LS a while now, read a few books, even the rather monotonous Game for a male point of view, my growing position is Just Be Yourself, people will either like it or not .....
runner Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Yep, easier said than done, but I agree its the only way to go. This is essential when you have to deal with SO many flakies, especially online. You know guys who sent you good emails and sound really interesting and then disappear without trace a few days or a week later. The thing is not to take it personally, probably everyone suffers from it - am I right?? Someone tell me???!!!! yep it's crucial not to take these things too personally. people have their problems and issues, and it's important not to take on thier burdens as your own; especially if you don't really know them all that well, just met, and dont' even have a relationship. sounds obvious what i just said, but apparently not obvious enough for some people. The next hardest part for me is making the what happens after you meet someone you are interested in. go with the flow. and if that flow ceases, then shift your attention. Although I have looked at LS a while now, read a few books, even the rather monotonous Game for a male point of view, my growing position is Just Be Yourself, people will either like it or not ..... yep, another crucial element is preserving your sense of self, and not allowing other people to so easily compromise that. and by 'be yourself', in the dating world i would take that a bit further by saying, "be your best self"; you can let your hair down a bit after you've decided to be in a relationship something else for the OP- go find this film if you can: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsNVBTCquuo&feature=fvsr the main character and her 'happy-go-lucky' attitude is brilliant and embodies a lot of what i'm talking about here
runner Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Thank you Runner. no worries- just putting it out there. /best
Author yellowhibiscus Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 yep it's crucial not to take these things too personally. people have their problems and issues, and it's important not to take on thier burdens as your own; especially if you don't really know them all that well, just met, and dont' even have a relationship. sounds obvious what i just said, but apparently not obvious enough for some people. go with the flow. and if that flow ceases, then shift your attention. yep, another crucial element is preserving your sense of self, and not allowing other people to so easily compromise that. and by 'be yourself', in the dating world i would take that a bit further by saying, "be your best self"; you can let your hair down a bit after you've decided to be in a relationship something else for the OP- go find this film if you can: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SsNVBTCquuo&feature=fvsr the main character and her 'happy-go-lucky' attitude is brilliant and embodies a lot of what i'm talking about here Thanks! I guess I'm just getting discouraged...this guy is really awesome but it could be too good to be true. I liked the video and liked that they played Lily Allen
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