carhill Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Seriously, why even agree to going out and give out your #, and then not follow through? Social lubricity. I liked refurb's response. Simple. Balanced. Respectful. Mindful of one's personal boundaries. Try it for a couple months and widen your focus. Proactively decide not to pursue a particular woman because of how you feel and have no regrets. If you don't like the interaction, don't interact again. As refurb said, *adjust your expectations*, both of the women *and* of yourself. Good luck
Mrlonelyone Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Of course, that's IRL and not on social networks dating forums. Yeah online dating and forums have to be considered a sort of 4th or 5th dimension of "real life" now. Everyone in the developed world and most of the developing world has a real world 3D self... and a online shadow self. That "shadow" can be getting hit on 24 X 7 X 365. That online self can meet people from around the world...in the form of a dating profile.
Author irc333 Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 Well, this explains a lot, when I called her, she was responding in the form of texting...I don't have texting capabilities, so I never got the text. LOL
Mrlonelyone Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 See a completely innocent explanation...much like my first post on this. Sometimes people just need to cut eachother some freaking slack in the dating game huh? lol.
Mrlonelyone Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Is she mute? carhill Allot of younger people now treat making a phone call as being something their lame old parents do. If anything they may consider text to be more intimate.
carhill Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 (edited) 'Hi, bla, bla, bla, please return my call at your earliest convenience' Me, I save intimacy for the bedroom; texts are electrons, kind of like this post. I can envision a Youtube parody of two youngun's making love through their Crackberry's Edited February 26, 2011 by carhill
Author irc333 Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 No, she couldn't call, because the venue was noisy. Is she mute? Allot of younger people now treat making a phone call as being something their lame old parents do. If anything they may consider text to be more intimate. She's hardly young, in fact, she's in her 40's. But she's a mom of teenagers, they probably got her hooked. lol
somedude81 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Me, I save intimacy for the bedroom; texts are electrons, kind of like this post. I can envision a Youtube parody of two youngun's making love through their Crackberry's
Mrlonelyone Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 'Hi, bla, bla, bla, please return my call at your earliest convenience' Me, I save intimacy for the bedroom; texts are electrons, kind of like this post. I can envision a Youtube parody of two youngun's making love through their Crackberry's Here's how you do that today. Tell the woman to set her crackberry to vibrate..... put it in the front of her pants and send text, after text, after text.... You get the idea.
carhill Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 (edited) 'There is a well-known and documented connection between sex and violence' OP, glad it worked out, so far, but I gotta tell you I've called enough people in the middle of rock concerts to know it has nothing to do with the ability of the phone to function. I call BS on that one. As to the rest, good luck Tell the woman to set her crackberry to vibrate..... put it in the front of her pants and send text, after text, after text.... You get the idea. Ah, so that's why I enjoy the 'missed call' alerts so much Edited February 26, 2011 by carhill
Author irc333 Posted February 26, 2011 Author Posted February 26, 2011 Well, she contacted me back...we're meeting tonight (but she messaged me, not call me) I guess it doesnt make a bit a diff. these days. These are the way of things. 'There is a well-known and documented connection between sex and violence' OP, glad it worked out, so far, but I gotta tell you I've called enough people in the middle of rock concerts to know it has nothing to do with the ability of the phone to function. I call BS on that one. As to the rest, good luck Ah, so that's why I enjoy the 'missed call' alerts so much
Cee Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Glad things worked out and you have a date tonight. Enjoy.
Mrlonelyone Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 I'm glad this worked out for you. Sometimes not just walking away at the first bump pays off.
Titania22 Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Well, this explains a lot, when I called her, she was responding in the form of texting...I don't have texting capabilities, so I never got the text. LOL Seriously you don't have texting capabilities. How do you even live?
fishtaco Posted February 26, 2011 Posted February 26, 2011 Well the moral of the story in this one is don't jump the gun and have some patience. When people want to reach you, eventually they will. But this doesn't change the fact that women will NOT stop doing "this". It happens, all the time. You (as in us men) have to learn to deal with it.
Author irc333 Posted February 27, 2011 Author Posted February 27, 2011 I dunno, there's no need for texting, texting is just a el cheapo minor upgrade to talking on the phone actually. It's no major, impressive acheivement in communication. I see it as a gimmick, nothing more....kind of like screen in screen T.V. function, it's "cute", but not all that great or something to write home about. It's not that much of a step-up from a cell phone call. You can also take a phone call more seriously than a text message. Seriously you don't have texting capabilities. How do you even live?
Titania22 Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 I dunno, there's no need for texting, texting is just a el cheapo minor upgrade to talking on the phone actually. It's no major, impressive acheivement in communication. I see it as a gimmick, nothing more....kind of like screen in screen T.V. function, it's "cute", but not all that great or something to write home about. It's not that much of a step-up from a cell phone call. You can also take a phone call more seriously than a text message. It's easy to run out of phone credit with calls, very hard to do it with texting, and you can think through your responses carefully with texting, a phone call is right there, if you forget to say something too bad, if you get tongue tied its obvious. And when you ring someone and they happen to be busy, and you say 'don't worry I can talk to you later' and they say 'no just tell me what it is', it is very pressuring. When you recieve a text if you are in the middle of something it can wait, but you answer a phone call, and you are expected to be paying full attention and inthe communication zone at a moment warning, despite whatever is going on in your real life at the time. I could go on, but the message is clear phone communication is generally a recipe for trouble for me. If a text message conversation is complex, I will general call then to provide clarification, but otherwise texting is better because it gives time to order thoughts.
Author irc333 Posted February 27, 2011 Author Posted February 27, 2011 It's easy to run out of phone credit with calls For me, not at all, I only have 450 mins a month, I hardly go through them. A phone call is right there, if you forget to say something too bad, if you get tongue tied its obvious. I don't care if it's obvious. If you forget to say something, call back and tell them what you forgot. And when you ring someone and they happen to be busy, and you say 'don't worry I can talk to you later' and they say 'no just tell me what it is', it is very pressuring. My friends don't force expect me rush in a conversation when they're busy, if they are busy, they let it go to voice mail,or they say what you just told me, and I say, "Oh okay, talk to you later" *click* When you recieve a text if you are in the middle of something it can wait, but you answer a phone call, and you are expected to be paying full attention and inthe communication zone at a moment warning, despite whatever is going on in your real life at the time. Umm....that's what voicemail is for, let it go to voicemail. I could go on, but the message is clear phone communication is generally a recipe for trouble for me. I suppose that's the key here, it's means trouble for YOU and not for me. Your plan works for you, and MY plan works for me.... In actuality that's why they have cell phone "plans", the purpose of plans is to accomodate whatever fits the needs of the customer.
Titania22 Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 If you forget to say something, call back and tell them what you forgot. My friends don't force expect me rush in a conversation when they're busy, if they are busy, they let it go to voice mail,or they say what you just told me, and I say, "Oh okay, talk to you later" *click* Ok, just to be clear though, we aren't talking about friends, we are talking about people we are hoping to get sex from. And yes 'don't force expect me rush in a conversation when they're busy' happened to me less than 2wks ago, and 'call back and tell them what you forgot', gets taken the wrong way by guys all the time. But I get it texting doesn't always work great either, and you have found what works for you, but don't expect some girl you date to have as much phone credit. ANd it gets really crap when I have to use my daughters phone and then he messages her rather than me with kinky sex stuff. Look phones are trouble every which way you look. And I am sorry I am going off, but you probably know from the other thread I am crazy horny and frustrated right now, and wondering what the point is of having a guy for sex, if I can't have sex when I need it. *crying*
Author irc333 Posted February 27, 2011 Author Posted February 27, 2011 Ok, just to be clear though, we aren't talking about friends, we are talking about people we are hoping to get sex from. I could care less, it doesn't make a lick of difference to me....friends or "people we are hoping to get sex from", to me, it's neither here nor there. And yes 'don't force expect me rush in a conversation when they're busy' happened to me less than 2wks ago, and 'call back and tell them what you forgot', gets taken the wrong way by guys all the time. But I get it texting doesn't always work great either, and you have found what works for you, but don't expect some girl you date to have as much phone credit. Okay, if it's going to be THAT much of an inconvenience to a woman who has texting to simply correspond with a man. If it's going to be that "HARD" for her to deal with it. She's something I wouldn't care to know anyways, and would not be someone I would want to have "sex" with anyhow, much less even date. Hell, if it's that much of a problem to anyone, they should consider rethinking their priorities in life. ANd it gets really crap when I have to use my daughters phone and then he messages her rather than me with kinky sex stuff. Huh??!! WTH are you letting your b/f text your daughter's phone, why are you furthering complicating things? Look phones are trouble every which way you look. No, you seem to create the trouble here, lol And I am sorry I am going off, but you probably know from the other thread I am crazy horny and frustrated right now, and wondering what the point is of having a guy for sex, if I can't have sex when I need it. *crying* You went way off the deep end here, thus ends the thread. LOL
Eddie Edirol Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 (edited) IRC, just so you know, if youre gonna continue dating, youre gonna have to jump on the texting bandwagon. You will have to put messaging on your phone and join the new decade. Its not 1998 anymore, too many people decide they are awkward on the phone with someone they dont know well. Most daters text as communication now. If you tell a new woman that you dont text for any reason, its instantly a turn off and a strike against you. You dont want to start off that way. You wont bend them to your calling will, you will just send them away, and you cant afford that since youre not approaching as many women as you should. You dont have to text novels to them, just dont answer them as fast and text them to call you. BTW, you know you dont care if you talk to them, you just want to control the situation, and thats going to sink you. In addition, you have to do better reading of women to see if they are REALLY into you or just giving you their number to get rid of you. Too many women dont want to deal with a guys possible retaliation if she says no, so you have to make sure she is really into you IN PERSON before asking her for her number. Make sure she asks you things about you, thats a clue. Dont just collect numbers just because youre interested, she has to be interested too. You also have to assume that if you call and she doesnt answer the phone that she isnt interested. You leave a message and dont call after that. If you text her and she doesnt answer, you dont text again until she gets back to you. if she doesnt, its her loss, not yours. A woman who is truly interested in you will return your call if you leave a message. If she doesnt, (or doesnt text) you dont worry about it. Since this one didnt call you back, I have a feeling she will flake on you again soon. Many people say "I texted you, didnt you get it?" knowing they are lying, you gave her an out since you dont have messaging on your phone. At least know that she might have lied and agreed to the date to avoid rejecting you again. Edited February 27, 2011 by Eddie Edirol
KuroOnna Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 Women and men both play those stupid games. They cause confusion and chaos. People don't like to be played, so why would you become a player? It makes no sense. You receive what you give. I personally don't understand why games need to be played. Whatever happened to honesty? Screw if it hurts, just tell them the truth and get it over with. Running around skirting around the issue causes deeper problems, and gets us nowhere but in a deeper hole than we began with. Be sincere. Be honest. It's possible to do it with tact, and I understand not wanting to hurt someone, but they will have respect for you if you tell them the truth, rather than for them to find out you lied or ignored them, which is worse. Another thing; people assume far too much. You get that idea in your head, and it sticks so fast that you are convinced that that is the way it is, and get angry when you were wrong, and take it out on the other, telling them it's their fault. So, in other words, you assume something about someone based on face value, and when you are wrong about it (and since you believed it, that means you lied to yourself) they are the ones to blame? I don't understand that either. We were given speech so that we could communicate more effectively. But now people say what they don't mean, twist their words, and make it something different, to the point where we can't trust a person's word anymore. And so many play this game. Why would you want to play a game that is not fun?
wbr4p Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 ive never done this and i know, i catch your drift. shes an idiot, be glad that you didnt waste your time.
Recommended Posts