maddii Posted February 25, 2011 Posted February 25, 2011 I think I'm doing pretty well since I've gone NC, although, I do still hold out hope that we will be together in the future, I'm just scared that if we don't end up together, then it's not meant to be etc, but what if I don't find somebody else who's as right for me as he was? I'm 21, and he's the first person I've had real feelings for, and gotten close to, so it's not as if I connect with people that often, so I guess I'm worried now (and yes, I'll probably read back in a few years and think how naive I was) that I won't get him back, but I won't find somebody better either, that I'll have to settle for someone who doesn't have all the qualities he had.. The only thing wrong between us was the fact that he's too immature and wasn't ready for a relationship, and didn't know how to deal with it, so it's not as if I can say 'oh I don't want someone like him', because I do, just, when he's ready.. but now I have this worry, which I never had before I met him, about being alone in the future.. Does anybody have any advice.. I know I'm probably just being stupid, but that's how I've been feeling since we stopped speaking, it honestly feels as if not speaking to him and being with him is the wrong thing, but I know it wouldn't work out right now..
smudge21 Posted February 25, 2011 Posted February 25, 2011 You're doing what every single one of us does - thinking that your ex was the only one and that they'll never be anyone better... we all do it and it's so hard to get them off that pedestal you put them on. Right now you're seeing only the good times as you still have such strong feelings for them. Within time, those feelings will fade and you will see it more openly and honestly. Then and only then will you realise that he wasn't the one and that the one is still out there waiting to be found. For now, just allow yourself to accept these feelings, they're perfectly natural and part of the healing process. Eventually you'll be in a better place, but give it time.
Author maddii Posted February 25, 2011 Author Posted February 25, 2011 Thank you, I can definately see more clearly now that there were bad things, compared to 6 weeks ago, but they still don't seem to outweigh the good because all of the bad things correlate to his immaturity.. which, I think, is what's making it so hard to accept that it may never work because it feels like its just a matter of waiting until he does mature a bit more and is willing to be in a relationship..
Recommended Posts