i dont think no contact actually brings them back?

[roman_pavluchenko]

Ive been thinking about no contact for a while...and decided to do it, and have been doing it for about 2 weeks, she dumped me 3 weeks ago and i occasionally see her in a social setting but avoid her. Now my last girlfriend and i went out for 8 months and in that time we really liked eachother, but ended up breaking up because we just fell out of love, it was mutual, no pain involved. I still saw her at school, although i avoided her, i dont know why she just started to annoy me for some reason and a month later i get this massive message from her telling me about all the good times we had together and that she wanted to be best friends again, i was pretty suprised and just agreed, but i never really talked to her again, but by going no contact (without knowing it) she came back to me. Now after my girlfriend dumped me, it was different because i still wanted to be with her, but within a week of being broken up with her i stared thinking of my ex, who i dated for 8 months. I ended up adding her on facebook and we talked for a little while just asking how eachother is and what our ambitions are for next year, but after that i havent thought about her again. My point is, if someone your trying to get back starts dating someone else and you think this is a good thing because they may realise you were better than their current partner, and they fall apart and your ex is suddenly back in contact with you, i dont think its a good idea to show any sign of hope that they'll come back to you, because they're probably just looking for someone to talk to? thats how i see it anyways. Basically i saw myself as the dumper, because i was the one who said i think we should end it, we were best friends before dating, after she sent me the message i hadnt talked to her for about 1 year and 1/2, and losing my other girlfriend made me think about my ex and contact her, but i had no intentions of getting her back, i just wanted to see how she was, if she didnt reply, i wouldnt think twice about it, but at one stage we were in love. Now i feel its kind of the same situation but im in a different position, i was best friends with this girl, we started dating, she breaks my heart. I decide to go no contact with her, but i dont think she ever actually "loved" me, so i highly doubt there is any chance she'll come back to me.

Edited February 24, 2011 by roman_pavluchenko