SoCalWingman Posted March 28, 2004 Posted March 28, 2004 My name is Tom and I'm a 19 year old guy from SoCal. I recently met this amazing girl who is a few years older than me and she has 2 kids. One is a toddler and the other is a few months old. We hit it the night we met at a friend's poker game. That night ended in a kiss and some extra cash we'd won, but our mutual friends tell me that she is currently living with the father of the kids and that he is an overprotective psycho. They are not together, as she is just living there for the free room. If he were to find out that we wanted to have a relationship with each other, he would probably kick her out. I have no problem with the fact that she has kids and I really want this to work, but I don't know whether we should be secretive or public. Please offer any advise, the sooner the better!!!! Thanks.
Arabess Posted March 28, 2004 Posted March 28, 2004 Until she moved OUT of her current living arrangement, I wouldn't see her again period. As long as she is living with him and he is controlling her life, they are still a couple....even if just emotionally. However, she may move out if another guy offers her a better place to live. In short, she is taking no responsibilty for her own life. She is coasting thru. I don't know if I would consider someone like that as much of an asset. I knew a girl like that who worked with me for awhile. I think she went thru 3 guys in one year....confusing the hell out of her 2 year old. She just couldn't seem to grow up enough to find her own way. She needed a daddy figure pulling her thru.....so she migrated from guy to guy. I always wondered if she really loved any of them or was just trying to upgrade her living arrangements. I'd be careful SCW.....this one may not be worth it. In the end, you could amount to not much more than a stepping stone.
priscilla Posted March 28, 2004 Posted March 28, 2004 I agree, move on. There is no way this would work if she is living with him. Can't she live with her folks? Anyway, this guy could be potentially dangerous if he is an "overprotective psycho". And, do you really want an instant family at 19? Find someone who is unattached and no kids.
morrigan Posted March 28, 2004 Posted March 28, 2004 She may be a great girl, but until she moves out of her ex's house and makes a life for herself, don't date her. Financial situations can be tough at times, but to date her now would be getting yourself involved in the day to day issues her and the ex have. If the guy is violent, it's not going to be a safe spot to be in.
Fritz Posted March 28, 2004 Posted March 28, 2004 Doesn't sound like much of an "ex" boyfriend to me. Move on..unless you want an instant family.
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