Bateman Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 1 month NC and making a lot of progress until BAM! Last night I had a dream she was begging me to come back. She told me everything I wanted to hear (She was also naked) then we were fine. Woke up and then reality set in. I feel like this set me back a couple of weeks....dammit.
brokenticker Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 I know how you feel.. The dreams are the worst... Ive dreamt most nights.. She said she has made a mistake and she wants me back.. I also dreamt about one of her exs.. who lives in a different country now! that he is now with her... The subconsious does terrible things to you! But Im guessing over time it will pass... Keep up with the No Contact.. Im only on day 12 of no contact.. and its her birthday today.. a few short months ago on my birthday we had the perfect day together.. now im left hollow! But I know with no contact I will heal.. and maybe one day the dream of her getting back with me will come true.. could be the same for you
Author Bateman Posted February 23, 2011 Author Posted February 23, 2011 Sorry to hear that bro. It's like my brain is trying to work out the issues I'm trying not to think about everyday. Good luck with NC. It gets easier because you get used to them not being in your life anymore which helps you let go.
flow15 Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 I feel for you.. I dream about my ex every night and it sucks so much. Its been a month since he ended it and nearly a month NC... and he is still on my mind nearly every second of the day, and then at night I dream of him. Its like I can't escape!! Dreams are the worst, I wake up feeling sick because it feels so real that they were there, when the reality is that they're not. I guess with time, the less they are on our minds the less they will crop up in our dreams. Try to keep your mind occupied with other things as hard as it is...
makelemonade1974 Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 1 month NC and making a lot of progress until BAM! Last night I had a dream she was begging me to come back. She told me everything I wanted to hear (She was also naked) then we were fine. Woke up and then reality set in. I feel like this set me back a couple of weeks....dammit. Not fair! I want MY ex to be naked in my dreams. Lol, I just want my ex to be naked.
brokenticker Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 Sorry to hear that bro. It's like my brain is trying to work out the issues I'm trying not to think about everyday. Good luck with NC. It gets easier because you get used to them not being in your life anymore which helps you let go. Thanks... I think No contact is working.. ive never been in a proper meaningful relationship before.. so ive never had to use it.. But i think im at the eye of the storm at the moment.. all seems to ok.. i have those numb feelings still.. but the upset isnt there anymore... Im worried that the longer it goes with no contact reality will hit and ill go back to how i was at the start.. completly off my food.. an emotional wreck etc.. etc.. Then ill start to heal.. i really hope im wrong haha
Author Bateman Posted February 23, 2011 Author Posted February 23, 2011 Thanks... I think No contact is working.. ive never been in a proper meaningful relationship before.. so ive never had to use it.. But i think im at the eye of the storm at the moment.. all seems to ok.. i have those numb feelings still.. but the upset isnt there anymore... Im worried that the longer it goes with no contact reality will hit and ill go back to how i was at the start.. completly off my food.. an emotional wreck etc.. etc.. Then ill start to heal.. i really hope im wrong haha That being said, if you do hit rock bottom again at least you will kind of know how to deal with it and it will be easier. It happened to me when I decided to stay friends with my ex. Still in love but it was one-sided and I had to go complete NC again. This time though I got a little bit of closure because I laid it all on the line and told her how I felt. Spilled my guts to her but without the hope of getting her back. It's the only way I was really able to let go. I felt fine for a little while but now I think I'm falling off the wagon again. haha. I won't fold though. Too many steps forward.
Author Bateman Posted February 23, 2011 Author Posted February 23, 2011 Not fair! I want MY ex to be naked in my dreams. Lol, I just want my ex to be naked. It was so vivid too! I remembered every part of that woman's body. haha!
willpower Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 Not fair! I want MY ex to be naked in my dreams. Lol, I just want my ex to be naked. Really be careful what you wish for - I used to have this dream where I walked down the stairs and she was banging another man on the sofa. No chance of getting back to sleep after it. All I can say is that the dreams do go - 3 and a half months on I no longer have her in my dreams. I was really bad to begin with, pretty much had a week of no sleep. Just keep going, understand you'll feel like exploding for a while and try and channel that emotional energy into doing things. As Noah and the Whale wrote "you know in a year, its gonna be better". Never give up hope - something new and amazing is out there if you can muster the strength to keep going.
broken-and-lost Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 i feel for you bro i'm the same keep myself under control through the days and bang...... ****ing hate going to bed as i know she is going to be there waiting for me only to wake up and she not ****ing hurts every morning
Duckduckgoose Posted February 23, 2011 Posted February 23, 2011 Its been about 3 months since my stbxH left and at first I dreamed about him a lot, now not so much. Perhaps once in the past month. Would wake up feeling like I got hit by a wrecking ball. I dream about my exbfs sometimes too. One of them a lot, and we carry on conversations and everything. In one dream where my stbxH had just finished being a jerk to me, that exbf came around and put his arm around me and stuff. Its weird because I haven't had contact with that exbf since 2006.
Author Bateman Posted February 23, 2011 Author Posted February 23, 2011 Dreams seem to be the only uncontrollable aspect of going through a break up. You can force yourself to go into NC, you can physically remove things that remind you of them, we even know how to release endorphins to make us feel better, but NO NO NO, when we go to sleep and let our subconscious take over, it won't make us forget! The first night of my breakup, I had the worst nightmare. I still remember it, it was like a horror movie. I can't mention the things that were in this dream. Too violent. I didn't even know I could ever fathom these things. The ex wasn't in it though. Weird.
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