jwl Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 maybe i trying to find reasons not to break up with him and walk away but, i know i love him but, after 5 years together his doesn´t seem to be ready for a family i am scared because he is 11 years older than me, and i want to start a family, and i am afraid that when is is ready he might be too old.. i the youngest at my family and i know what it feels when you father is too old for games, and stuff, i don´t want that for my family, i am 26, soon to be 27.. we have a great relation, yes he is a little to grumpy sometimes, and i am a mess, but we have been thru so much, when we start he was married at that time, during our first year he went over the divorce and we split, then i got pregnat and he didn´t want the child i was so stu... i got an abortion, i tought i was over him, but we remain together.. but he still wouldn´t commit, we keep spliting and going back together, two years ago i had another abortion, after that i dated another guys but never felt the way i felt with him, we love the same things, now i feel different with myself now i know what i want, and i want to start a family .. we had a great year, we are planning vacations,and we spend so much time together. i think he should be ready by now, he has always been so romantic, last valentine´s he sent as usual, flowers, cards etc, what if he won´t ever be ready for us to start what we always planned? am i wasting my time? as i said i have met a lot of guys but no one as smart, toughtfull, caring, romantic, as he .. Link to post Share on other sites
Duckduckgoose Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 Ask him why he won't get married. Very directly. If you don't like the answer then don't marry him, leave him. He is not all that and a bag of chips as you say if he will not marry you and that is what you want. Also, please consider getting on BC pills. Abortions are very hard on your body and if you keep having them by the time you do want kids there will either be major complications or you won't be able to become pregnant at all. Link to post Share on other sites
IfiKnewThen Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 i am going to echo duckduckgoose. he doesn't sound smart, thoughtful, caring and romantic as you say. i am sure he possesses some of those qualities but they sound pretty thin. does he seem smart to almost let you go by not compromising and truly caring about what you want? is it so romantic for him not to consider that you want a family? hes gummy. you're on and off again. you guys already sound like you could use a counselor. (not that i like counselors ). but the point is..there is trouble in paradise...so you guys really need to work it out and ask yourselves what you can live with and what you can live without. you dont seem like a good fit right now. i know you havent met anyone yet you felt is "like him"..or better..so that makes it harder to end it with him. but that doesnt mean you never will meet someone who is a better fit for you. Link to post Share on other sites
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