ctx2 Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Ugg, i've made the commitment to NC, but I feel like i'm losing it! I constantly look at his FB and even though we're not friends, I can look at his friends and see if any have been added, not to mention I drove by his home tonight which made things worse because he wasn't there at 10:30pm. I have become the dreaded stalker! I'm serious, I feel like i'm losing control because looking at the timeline, it's clear there's another girl involved and it all makes so much sense. Yes, I shouldn't care cuz he's a loser, yes, I should be mad forget him and move on, but i'm literally obsessing, because I just want to catch him with her and tell him what a douche he is! I can't believe that i've resorted to this and I feel it's because I knew all along that he wouldn't change from the past. He was caught last time and this time, he didn't want me to know and said he just doubted he could go to the next level with me when he was trying to hide the fact that he started the new semester with a new interest who he got to know over a weekend at a conference and when I gave him an out, he took it and now they are starting things and she's completely unaware of everything. Thoughts? I know I can decide not to do these things, but right now, i'm so focused on NC that I feel I could go nuts if I don't do the rest. I have really hit a low point in my life.
D78 Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Ugg, i've made the commitment to NC, but I feel like i'm losing it! I constantly look at his FB and even though we're not friends, I can look at his friends and see if any have been added, not to mention I drove by his home tonight which made things worse because he wasn't there at 10:30pm. I have become the dreaded stalker!... Umm... you haven't even started NC yet. NC requires no looking at his FB, no driving by his house, no trying to run into him in public, etc. You have to try to delete him from your life so you can recover. It's hard as hell, but after the first day you will begin to feel better. ... Yes, I shouldn't care cuz he's a loser, yes, I should be mad forget him and move on, but i'm literally obsessing, because I just want to catch him with her and tell him what a douche he is!... Well, you care, so there's no need to beat yourself up about it. With time, you'll get over that. If you're sure he cheated or left you for someone else, don't give him any more of your time or energy by trying to actually catch them. There's no point. Telling him he's a douche may make you feel temporarily better, but in the long run it will do nothing to help you heal. He won't believe you anyways. You will just humiliate yourself in front of him and his new girl. Focus on yourself right now, not him. ... I have really hit a low point in my life. The good news is that it's uphill from here. STOP STALKING HIM! You're better than that. Good luck.
Author ctx2 Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 Umm... you haven't even started NC yet. NC requires no looking at his FB, no driving by his house, no trying to run into him in public, etc. You have to try to delete him from your life so you can recover. It's hard as hell, but after the first day you will begin to feel better. Well, you care, so there's no need to beat yourself up about it. With time, you'll get over that. If you're sure he cheated or left you for someone else, don't give him any more of your time or energy by trying to actually catch them. There's no point. Telling him he's a douche may make you feel temporarily better, but in the long run it will do nothing to help you heal. He won't believe you anyways. You will just humiliate yourself in front of him and his new girl. Focus on yourself right now, not him. The good news is that it's uphill from here. STOP STALKING HIM! You're better than that. Good luck. Well, poo, I thought I was NC, cuz there have no been no calls or texts for 48 hours, so starting now, I will quit the FB stuff and house stuff. I will stop obsessing over his schedule and I will focus on me. This is going to be so difficult, but I am going to do it. Tomorrow morning will be a new day and I am going to work my rear off to stick to all the way NC! I've done okay with erasing messages, pics, and such and i'll just have to remove him from everything else! Thanks for the support.
D78 Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 You're half-way to NC. At first, you have to work on it every minute of the day. After a while, it will become second nature and you can get over him. Just post to LS when you feel like yelling at him. If I can do it, you can do it!
Author ctx2 Posted February 21, 2011 Author Posted February 21, 2011 I have today off since I work for the government!!! I woke up thinking that today is the day i'm not going to watch FB, drive by, text, phone, etc. (i've been doing the text/phone thing for about 36 hours, but i'm starting everything else today. It's hard, I can't stop thinking about it and I find myself wanting to at least peek on FB, but I am staying vigilant. Instead, i'm about to get outta bed, shower, have lunch with friends, check out some gardening items, go to practice, and jog! So, yes, I am going to keep myself sooooo busy that I can't sit here and obsess. Wish me luck and i'll keep you updated!
Recommended Posts