blind_otter Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I guess when you're living in "the swamp" you wouldn't know eh? Lol. Hard to get is basically a woman who isn't easy to land. She could either be classy, or playing stupid games. Depends on the woman. the swamp, come ON man. Gay goaters! I mean go gators. Games, schmames. I think everyone is doing the best they can with the tools they have available. It's just that it's scary to be vulnerable. All those hoops are basically the psychological version of ineffectually fluttering your hands in front of your face to get a bug away from you. Defense mechanisms are a beyotch.
zengirl Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Men want a woman who is an emotional challenge, and doesn't give away the whole store on the 1st date, just as women want that from men. It allows a person to see if someone wants to be with THAT PERSON for who he/she is, or if they just fall for the "idea" of anybody they can date. Giving away the whole emotional shebang too quickly is a mistake too many women make, and it's why they are advised to "Play hard to get." Playing too hard to get is just bad implementation of a good idea; it's creating a game out of emotional health, and that's lame. Emotionally healthy people are a little hard to get, because they don't invest immediately, want to know a person before committing or falling for them, and have their own **** together and their own lives going on. So, being 'hard to get' in a healthy way is fine. Playing games with it usually escapes the point. It's a crutch to keep you unhealthy, and if you stay unhealthy, the insecurity and issues will seep in eventually. Also, you'll likely be too extreme, and people won't realize when you're genuinely interested and where you're coming from, as a person.
Ay Diesel T Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 the swamp, come ON man. Gay goaters! I mean go gators. Games, schmames. I think everyone is doing the best they can with the tools they have available. It's just that it's scary to be vulnerable. All those hoops are basically the psychological version of ineffectually fluttering your hands in front of your face to get a bug away from you. Defense mechanisms are a beyotch. BOOOOO GATORS! Lol, actually I have alot of love for UF, go partying up there once a year. It's great. Yeah it's scary being vulnerable, but I don't think it makes you vulnerable if you're straight forward, no?
Woggle Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 It's their loss. If a woman wants to play stupid games then move on. Why is it of concern to you if somebody wants to play childish games with you?
Disillusioned Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Helllloooo, people... this is the 21st Century!!!!! If you play HTG, you better remember that all a guy has to do is go on FB or Tw1tter and tell everyone, "don't waste your time on her, she's not interested!" Then the damage will be done, unless you live some bizarre sort of Wonder Woman/Diana Prince double life. But I don't let it get me down... I see plenty of posts by women complaining that they can't meet any decent guys. Guess why? A decent guy is never going to bother going to the usual meat markets because they're a waste of his time, and he sure isn't going to stalk you to one of these places just so you can give him the slip. He's too busy living well. YOU have to go out and pick HIM.
sayitasitis Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Just talked to some female friends. They keep losing out. They play hard to get like a man worth having is gonna stick around. It's funny how they try to bluff these guys then when they move on they feel like they have totally missed out. Maybe you shouldn't play SO hard to get then lmao. What happened to male persistence? If they really like you, they would do whatever to get you, no?
Avaa Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 What happened to male persistence? If they really like you, they would do whatever to get you, no? From experience-yes
blind_otter Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 BOOOOO GATORS! Lol, actually I have alot of love for UF, go partying up there once a year. It's great. Yeah it's scary being vulnerable, but I don't think it makes you vulnerable if you're straight forward, no? I guess it depends if you put yourself out there with expectations or not. And honestly, some people can't handle straight forward anything. I swear the last few guys I have met have had worse PMS than I do.
sayitasitis Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 From experience-yes That means those that don't persist, you wouldn't want too, right?
Ay Diesel T Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I guess it depends if you put yourself out there with expectations or not. And honestly, some people can't handle straight forward anything. I swear the last few guys I have met have had worse PMS than I do. You've got bad PMS? Hard to tell, that's a cute and friendly smile in your avatar. Straight forward is the way to go, it gets rid of all the confusion.
Woggle Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 What happened to male persistence? If they really like you, they would do whatever to get you, no? This is called stalking and there are laws against it. Men go to jail over this kind of thing. I like the kind of woman where yes means yes and no means no. If she says no and really means yes that is just too bad. Luckily I have a straightforward woman where I never have to guess what is on her mind.
sayitasitis Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 This is called stalking and there are laws against it. Men go to jail over this kind of thing. I like the kind of woman where yes means yes and no means no. If she says no and really means yes that is just too bad. Luckily I have a straightforward woman where I never have to guess what is on her mind. I don't mean you should stalk her. But do more than just go date someone else immediately after a bit of resistence.
Woggle Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I don't mean you should stalk her. But do more than just go date someone else immediately after a bit of resistence. That is what I would do if I were single. I have zero tolerance for stupid games. This is not high school anymore.
blind_otter Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 You've got bad PMS? Hard to tell, that's a cute and friendly smile in your avatar. Straight forward is the way to go, it gets rid of all the confusion. Ugh. I guess I just had a bad experience with a guy who was a little manipulative, and he had the ability to make me feel like a false sense of intimacy. I'm very straight forward, but what can you do when you're dealing with someone who feels like they have to maneuver through the world manipulating other people to get what they want? Oh, and thanks for the compliment, nice pecs.
sayitasitis Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I don't mean playing games. But sometimes it takes a while before a girl decides the guy is someone she wants to know more.
phineas Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Men want a woman who is an emotional challenge, and doesn't give away the whole store on the 1st date, just as women want that from men. It allows a person to see if someone wants to be with THAT PERSON for who he/she is, or if they just fall for the "idea" of anybody they can date. Giving away the whole emotional shebang too quickly is a mistake too many women make, and it's why they are advised to "Play hard to get." Playing too hard to get is just bad implementation of a good idea; it's creating a game out of emotional health, and that's lame. Emotionally healthy people are a little hard to get, because they don't invest immediately, want to know a person before committing or falling for them, and have their own **** together and their own lives going on. So, being 'hard to get' in a healthy way is fine. Playing games with it usually escapes the point. It's a crutch to keep you unhealthy, and if you stay unhealthy, the insecurity and issues will seep in eventually. Also, you'll likely be too extreme, and people won't realize when you're genuinely interested and where you're coming from, as a person. This is how I "date". I call you up, I ask you out. The answer is either "yes" or "no" I consider anything other than "yes" to be a "no". if there is no alternative offered I move on. period. Playing hard to get or just not interested? don't care. At this point in my life i look at the list of crap I gotta do inside my house before spring & the list of crap I gotta do outside my house once spring comes & I honestly just don't have time to waste on women playing games. It's a major turn off to me.
Mrlonelyone Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I don't mean playing games. But sometimes it takes a while before a girl decides the guy is someone she wants to know more. The thing is some women play hard to get as in giving out mixed signals. Coming on with one hand and shoeing you away with another. What is a man supposed to do with that?
Ay Diesel T Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Ugh. I guess I just had a bad experience with a guy who was a little manipulative, and he had the ability to make me feel like a false sense of intimacy. I'm very straight forward, but what can you do when you're dealing with someone who feels like they have to maneuver through the world manipulating other people to get what they want? Oh, and thanks for the compliment, nice pecs. I hear ya. What if you're very convincing but not to the point where you want to use that, to use people? Lol. Is charm manipulative in your eyes? Best thing to do with a manipulator is strip them of their power, leave them with nothing to manipulate. Being straight forward will always prevent mixed communication though. But sometimes, being straight forward can be seen as too blunt, and sometimes, manipulative. What can ya do? I often have issues with insecure people more than manipulators. Manipulators work off of chance. If I feel like I'm being manipulated, the chance isn't even taken. But then again, this is all conditional. So much complication in the dating world lol. If only there were more straight forward people in the world. And thank you...on my pecs lol. Surprised you use that terminology. You work out yourself? Your face looks very slim, and you're glowing in your avatar. And that shirt is very tasteful. Nice.
phineas Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I don't mean playing games. But sometimes it takes a while before a girl decides the guy is someone she wants to know more. and how are you going to get to know him if you don't spend any time with him (a date)? That is why we ask you out. To get to know you.
sayitasitis Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 and how are you going to get to know him if you don't spend any time with him (a date)? That is why we ask you out. To get to know you. Oh, I don't mean giving mixed signals. But I've had experiences that while I was taking a while to know whether I like a guy, the guy jumped ship and went out with others. What's a girl supposed to do?
Woggle Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 This is how I "date". I call you up, I ask you out. The answer is either "yes" or "no" I consider anything other than "yes" to be a "no". if there is no alternative offered I move on. period. Playing hard to get or just not interested? don't care. At this point in my life i look at the list of crap I gotta do inside my house before spring & the list of crap I gotta do outside my house once spring comes & I honestly just don't have time to waste on women playing games. It's a major turn off to me. Exactly. Adults should date like adults and if a woman or man in some cases is still stuck on childish games then next them.
blind_otter Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I often have issues with insecure people more than manipulators. I just had an ah-ha moment, thank you. I hate it when anyone presents themselves in one way and then can't maintain the facade and get all wet noodley on me. And thank you...on my pecs lol. Surprised you use that terminology. You work out yourself? Your face looks very slim, and you're glowing in your avatar. And that shirt is very tasteful. Nice. It's a dress. My mother got it for me. Everything fashionable that I own was a gift from her. She's intimidatingly fashionable and accessorized.
Ay Diesel T Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I just had an ah-ha moment, thank you. I hate it when anyone presents themselves in one way and then can't maintain the facade and get all wet noodley on me. It's a dress. My mother got it for me. Everything fashionable that I own was a gift from her. She's intimidatingly fashionable and accessorized. The woman that can handle my honesty is the woman I'll give my heart to lol. You seem pretty grounded, what draws you to these boards? Must give mom a kiss on the cheek for me next time you see her, she passed on more than a good sense of fashion.
phineas Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 Oh, I don't mean giving mixed signals. But I've had experiences that while I was taking a while to know whether I like a guy, the guy jumped ship and went out with others. What's a girl supposed to do? I don't understand. What does taking a while mean? At any point in the process did you turn him down for a date?
sayitasitis Posted February 21, 2011 Posted February 21, 2011 I don't understand. What does taking a while mean? At any point in the process did you turn him down for a date? Actually I didn't. Maybe it was some vibe that I gave out, like I wasn't interested or not interested enough for him. I don't know. So I gathered that most guys don't persist enough.
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