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Officer: women can avoid being a victim of sexual assault by not dressing slutty


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Posted
You realize you didnt answer my question

 

Passed the age of 15, my daughter will be responsible for her clothing choices. How's that?

 

I've worn miniskirts and tank tops and would laugh in the face of men who thought it meant they could treat me like ****: that's because my parents taught me I deserve respect no matter what.

Posted
I would educate my daughter that she is responsible for herself and that she deserves respect in all situaiton. I would tell her to leave ASAP any time she doesn't feel safe in a situation or with someone. I would tell her to avoid being alone with a drunken guy, as studies have shown that a man's alcohol level is the biggest predictor of rape. I would tell her that rape is the rapist's crime, not the victim's fault.

 

And that is exactly what girls need to learn. Telling them "don't dress slutty or you'll be raped!" isn't going to keep them safe. They'll think they're fine as long as their skirt is long enough and their neckline is high enough, and the truth is that they won't be.

 

It's such a red herring. I could walk down the street buck naked with a man on my arm, and nothing would happen to me, except maybe loud comments and catcalls. I could wear long pants and a baggy sweater and walk home alone at night and find myself in serious danger. I could be totally covered up and let a male acquaintance into my apartment and suddenly find myself the victim of sexual assault.

 

And I absolutely agree 100% with you, Kamille, that we need to be teaching our sons, as well. Being sexually assaulted isn't like being struck by lightning: it's not something that just happens to some people by accident. Another thinking human being has to decide to rape and go through with it. Why not also focus on the ones doing the raping?

Posted

While so-called law enforcement will say anything to pass the buck, and always give out precautions for Any crime ..

 

The fact remains that from school age up, girls/women in our country, dress to look 'sexy' - incl enhancements.

 

It's like, save the outrage.

Posted
As part of a list of many things to watch out for if on that list is "mind your attire is certain situations"... yes, I would welcome that is reasonable advice.

 

No I would not feel like I'm being blamed...No I wouldn't feel like they are taking up for the assailant...I would take it as advice that I can use to keep myself a bit safer.

 

 

This thread is turning out exactly as I thought it would

 

Rape would continue because its not about sexual attraction so much as it is attaining power. So the result of telling a victim they should wear more clothes than they saw fit to leave the house in - the more fabric will get added as a deterrent. It is not the job of the populace to restrict themselves from detection by the worst element of our society. If it was we wouldn't have law enforcement at all. Their entire purpose is to ensure the safety of the masses. Telling us to handle it will not eliminate rape. Telling someone to put on more clothes and stop making you have to do your job will only result in that advise being applied till we all wear sacks from head to toe and guess what? Raped because our eyes were too enticing.:rolleyes: If you can't be arsed to do your job as a law enforcer without getting ****ty with victims for being victimized you should not be in law enforement period.

 

Do I expect I'd get more attention than I care to if I paraded down to the grocery store in a string bikini? Absolutely! But even a friggin bathing suit specifically covers those parts of your body you do not wish others to access without your permission. No one would ever ask for permission if we had some system in place where wearing particular items was some unspoken social signal that we want others to put their hands on us. You're suggesting we take the political approach of Islam and punish the victim, restrict and punish any potential victims as though we are some unruly car that keeps unlocking the doors when its owner leaves it parked somewhere.

 

When a cop signs up to serve and protect, they are agreeing to protect everyone, not just the people less likely to be targeted.

Posted
I never made that claim in my post; it's your projection. It's a rape myth that the appearance and sexual background of the victims somehow incites a perpetrator to rape. To sexually assault someone, even having been the victim of sexual abuse themselves, still is a choice. It's in no way a legitimate defense.

 

people say stupid crap

 

 

 

O'Malley:

 

You don't seem to know how this website works yet. You (and only you) put your (and only your) words and thoughts down in print which then remain in place as clear evidence of your words and thoughts.

 

You very clearly stated earlier:

 

Appearance or sexual background does not somehow trigger an individual to rape.

 

 

I merely drew attention to the fact that you are absolutely and indisputably incorrect in your statement as written earlier.

 

The offering of completely new statements doesn't do anything to erase the false statement which is already on record in such a way that it could only have originated from you.

 

And in case you are unaware, the so-called "victim" is not the one doing the "rape(ing)".

 

Furthermore, your more recent statements relating now to "victims" of rape are similarly inaccurate as well.

 

Only a fool believes that rape victims are chosen randomly as might be the jurors in the jury pool available for the trials of their accused rapists. Yeah, maybe your voter registration numbers or your Driver's License numbers decide whether you're going to become a victim of rape.

 

Others in this thread have talked about how to educate their sons and daughters about rape.

 

Well how about you STOP sexually abusing those sons and daughters!!!!

 

How about you STOP looking the other way when your spouses/parents/siblings/in-laws/babysitters/clergy/new boyfriends are sexually abusing those sons and daughters!!!!

 

It is without question that people who have been sexually abused as young children are exponentially more likely to become victims of adult rape than are those who have never before been sexually abused. Who anywhere could dispute such a reality?

 

 

Well, excepting O'Malley:

 

It's a rape myth that the appearance and sexual background of the victims somehow incites a perpetrator to rape.

 

people say stupid crap

 

 

Er, wait, maybe O'Malley is going to tell us that the phrase "sexual background" doesn't include having been violated/penetrated prior to the age of 10 or so.

  • Author
Posted
Rape would continue because its not about sexual attraction so much as it is attaining power. So the result of telling a victim they should wear more clothes than they saw fit to leave the house in - the more fabric will get added as a deterrent. It is not the job of the populace to restrict themselves from detection by the worst element of our society. If it was we wouldn't have law enforcement at all. Their entire purpose is to ensure the safety of the masses. Telling us to handle it will not eliminate rape. Telling someone to put on more clothes and stop making you have to do your job will only result in that advise being applied till we all wear sacks from head to toe and guess what? Raped because our eyes were too enticing.:rolleyes: If you can't be arsed to do your job as a law enforcer without getting ****ty with victims for being victimized you should not be in law enforement period.

 

Do I expect I'd get more attention than I care to if I paraded down to the grocery store in a string bikini? Absolutely! But even a friggin bathing suit specifically covers those parts of your body you do not wish others to access without your permission. No one would ever ask for permission if we had some system in place where wearing particular items was some unspoken social signal that we want others to put their hands on us. You're suggesting we take the political approach of Islam and punish the victim, restrict and punish any potential victims as though we are some unruly car that keeps unlocking the doors when its owner leaves it parked somewhere.

 

When a cop signs up to serve and protect, they are agreeing to protect everyone, not just the people less likely to be targeted.

 

~sigh~ :rolleyes:

Posted
~sigh~ :rolleyes:

 

~be an ass about someone having a different opinion than your own~ :rolleyes:

 

Just be glad being glib isn't raptastic cause your ass would so be sore by now. :p

Posted
I really think there could be a happy medium between these two views.

 

Whenever ANYONE commits a crime, of whatever type, it is always a criminal's fault. It is never the victim's fault, no matter what they do.

 

That said, no one has a problem with advising people to lock the doors of their houses when they leave to reduce the chance that they will be robbed. No one says that that is blaming the victim of robberies.

 

People commit rape for a variety of reasons--we do ourselves a disservice when we try to simplify issues like this and make them black-and-white to fit a political ideology or an academic theory. Yes, probably most rapes are about power, are premeditated, and have little to do with how the victim dresses on a given day. But, I think it's going too far to say that that is always the case, that it never happens that a rape occurs spontaneously, or that a rapist never selects a victim he doesn't know based on what she's wearing.

 

If a rich guy flashes tons of gold jewelry while walking alone on the streets of Detroit at night, and gets robbed, would people really have a problem saying that he did something foolish? Would they talk about how anyone who robs him must've been planning to rob him anyway? Is there never any idea of a “crime of opportunity”?

 

Can we not then also admit that a woman who walks around in “slutty” dress in the same rather extreme situation has done something foolish? Yes, in a perfect world both of these people would be completely safe. But, we are doing these two people a strong disservice when we insist based on a political idealistic viewpoint or an academic theory that they should be able to do what they are doing without anyone suggesting otherwise. Yes, in an ideal world that is true. But given the world we live in anyone who really cares about helping these people would suggest that maybe they should be a little more careful. Anyone who tells these two people that they are fine doing what they are doing is not interested in helping these people, but interested in promoting a political viewpoint only.

 

Please do not read this as I am somehow suggesting that all women should dress in burquas, or not dress sexy, or whatever. Just be reasonable. Everything that a person does is a spectrum of risk and reward, and it is reasonable to take reasonable risks. If a woman goes to a party with friends and dresses “slutty” the risk that she will bring on a rape is very very small—kind of like the risk of getting struck by lightning from carrying an umbrella. If she does the same thing at a drunken college party, alone, with no one she knows around, she is taking a somewhat larger risk. Again, in an ideal world that would not be true. But, we do harm to that woman when we try to make the actual world fit political ideals and not warn her that she is taking more of a risk than she maybe should.

 

Scott

 

It definitely increases the risk, yes. I agree with your analogy. However, my issue is with the title, 'Women can AVOID being a victim of rape by not dressing slutty', etc. Would you say that it is appropriate to say that we can all AVOID being victims of robberies by not showing our wealth in any way?

Posted

This is another example of an extreme view of male sexuality. "All men are pigs, they can't control themselves!"

 

Umm...no.

 

Real men can control themselves. It's the weak men who can't, and the sick men who can't. And those are the ones that should be held accountable. Not the woman, who is free to dress however she pleases.

  • Author
Posted (edited)
~be an ass about someone having a different opinion than your own~ :rolleyes:

 

 

Its not that you have a different opinion... its the conclusions you arrive at as a result of my opinions.... its mind boggling. I don't even know where you get them from.

 

Just be glad being glib isn't raptastic cause your ass would so be sore by now. :p

 

:confused:

Edited by StoneCold
Posted
Its not that you have a different opinion... its the conclusions you arrive at as a result of my opinions.... its mind boggling. I don't even know where you get them from.

:confused:

 

From paying taxes that pay law enforcement salaries. I expect to see a return.

 

Tell you what, when and if you get raped, you can go right ahead and look at what you did leading up to that experience for reason. Upon deciding its your fault you can just forgo reporting the crime.

 

I find the laws concerning rape and assault to be quite clear and wear what I want as there is no clause in these laws wherein certain attire makes anyone justified in ignoring them. I will report it and expect it to be taken seriously by those employed in part by me to handle such matters.

 

A cop stands up and craps out a statement like this one did and he tells anyone with a mind to rape that he will see their reasoning and make light of their action.

Posted
Rape has nothing to do with how a woman dresses. A woman should be able to dress light on a hot day without worrying if she is going to be raped or not. Rape is about power not sex anyway. It's not about how horny a man is.

 

I beg to differ, exactly what purpose would rape serve if sex was not involved? IF a man wants mere power over us then all he needs to do is hit us or steal from us, this comment makes no sense and I hear it all too often. Rape is ABOUT SEX the majority of the time, otherwise nobody would do it.

Posted (edited)

It is without question that people who have been sexually abused as young children are exponentially more likely to become victims of adult rape than are those who have never before been sexually abused. Who anywhere could dispute such a reality?

 

I absolutely agree with the above statement: however, you are misinterpreting my earlier posts. I wasn't making any conjecture about sexual abuse in a victim's background in my earlier posts. A rapist who previously was a victim of sexual abuse is still responsible for his choice to sexually abuse others -- that's what I was discussing.

 

I was discussing two particular rape myths, where the victim's sexual history (the number of sexual partners she/he had or whether she/he had previously had casual sex) and 'provocative' or 'slutty' appearance have been used as a justification of the rapist's behavior by law enforcement, by prosecutors, and by defense counsel. The officer was notifying women that not dressing 'slutty' would help lower their chances of being raped; repeated studies have disproven this rape myth. There are rape shield laws precisely because the above were used as justifications that the victim couldn't have been raped, because she/he had been sexually active in certain ways or had worn 'provocative' clothing.

 

Well how about you STOP sexually abusing those sons and daughters!!!!

 

How about you STOP looking the other way when your spouses/parents/siblings/in-laws/babysitters/clergy/new boyfriends are sexually abusing those sons and daughters!!!!

I think we're both miscommunicating with each other here, and you are reading opinions into my words that I never suggested at all. I'm sorry that this topic is making you so upset, but some of us on here have been victims of sexual assault. Personal attacks aren't warranted. Edited by O'Malley
  • Author
Posted
From paying taxes that pay law enforcement salaries. I expect to see a return.

 

Yeah you know what you're right... I want to see a return. they were hired to be cops not politicians. I want real cops....you want paper cops. Real cops dont pussy foot around...they inform as it is and they get sh*t done. Paper cops just pander to the media, dance around and get f*ckall done. Oh but thy sure can dance...

 

This happened in the city where I'm from. These days the cops (the upper brass especially) have been catching flack for being too political and not enough serve and protect. This guy was brought in as a specialist in this area...he deals with this DAILY; you think there might be something he might know about this? He was specifically told by his political superiors not to mention this at all. He acknowledges this YET openly defies them. Now WHY would someone openly defy specific orders like that? Do you really think he said that just to rattle some cages? to what end?

 

My take is he got sick and tired of having to play the political games; I have a lot of friends who are cops and they absolutely hate it because it just does nothing but tie everything up. He likely got tired of this because he joined the force to SERVE AND PROTECT not play games...so he said what needed to be said because there IS some truth surrounding this in certain situations....thats the sh*t h deals with every day.... THATS service

 

Tell you what, when and if you get raped, you can go right ahead and look at what you did leading up to that experience for reason.

 

WTF....I'm about this close to giving you a taste of your own medicine but I'll hold my tongue because I know you wouldn't be able to take it

 

I find the laws concerning rape and assault to be quite clear and wear what I want as there is no clause in these laws wherein certain attire makes anyone justified in ignoring them. I will report it and expect it to be taken seriously by those employed in part by me to handle such matters.

 

Apples and oranges

 

A cop stands up and craps out a statement like this one did and he tells anyone with a mind to rape that he will see their reasoning and make light of their action.

 

:confused::eek::rolleyes::confused::eek::confused::confused:

 

 

hahahhahahahaha

Posted (edited)

Real men can control themselves. It's the weak men who can't, and the sick men who can't. And those are the ones that should be held accountable. Not the woman, who is free to dress however she pleases.

 

 

But there ARE weak and sick men out there. Lots of them! Shouting how wrong they are and stating that women can dress however they want does not make them go away.

 

You can only control yourself. You have every right to dress however you want, but you have no control over how others view you.

 

If you walk around wearing a soccer uniform, some people may assume you play soccer. If you dress as a nurse, people may assume that you are one. And if you dress in a revealing manner, some weak or sick dude may think you're a slut. You can't control what the weak or sick dude is thinking about you. Even healthy men think about sex a lot...some men are home right now fantasizing and jerking off to the woman in the checkout line. Keeping it in your head is fine, but there are MANY people that do not have healthy boundaries, are mentally ill or under the influence of a substance.

 

Will dressing conservatively protect you? No. But it can mitigate the risk, IMO.

 

I can't control what others think, but I can take steps to control my safety.

 

It's not about the right or wrong of it...I think most agree that it is wrong to judge someone on their clothes and all agree that a woman is never "asking for it", it's about protecting yourself from the bad people out there.

 

And I do not believe that rape is 100% about power. The chick could be passed out drunk and the guy may just be horny and think he won't get caught. It can be about many things, and I don't see how anyone can say it is 100% about power, because you have not read every rapists mind. People have many different perversions...and in the case of pedophiles, although it may be about power in some way, I really do believe they are physically attracted to children. They have found sites with pedophiles rating the attractiveness of children. If it was all about power than looks would't even be a factor. I agree that power is definitely ONE factor, but to say that a person's physically appearance has no bearing whatsoever when a rapist is choosing his victim is short-sighted, IMO.

Edited by Quiet Storm
Posted
Keeping it in your head is fine, but there are MANY people that do not have healthy boundaries, are mentally ill or under the influence of a substance.

 

This is true, but it still has nothing to do with what a person is wearing.

 

It's not about the right or wrong of it...I think most agree that it is wrong to judge someone on their clothes and all agree that a woman is never "asking for it", it's about protecting yourself from the bad people out there.

 

And the point is that dressing differently is NOT going to protect you.

 

And I do not believe that rape is 100% about power. The chick could be passed out drunk and the guy may just be horny and think he won't get caught.

 

In that case, it wouldn't exactly matter what she's wearing. There could be a sober woman in a bikini next to the passed out fully-clothed drunk one. Which one would the potential rapist go for? The one who can't resist.

 

People have many different perversions...and in the case of pedophiles, although it may be about power in some way, I really do believe they are physically attracted to children. They have found sites with pedophiles rating the attractiveness of children. If it was all about power than looks would't even be a factor.

 

Pedophilia is different from your garden variety rape.

 

I agree that power is definitely ONE factor, but to say that a person's physically appearance has no bearing whatsoever when a rapist is choosing his victim is crazy, IMO.

 

It really doesn't. Again, I could walk down the street in broad daylight naked holding hands with my boyfriend, and no one would try to rape me.

 

Women would be better off if they were taught the importance of situational awareness. Don't walk home alone at night. If you do, avoid dark areas and pay attention to what you're doing: don't fiddle with your smartphone or listen to music. Don't let a man into your home unless you know him well, even if you're just coming home from the first date. Don't end up alone with a drunk man. Don't get completely drunk unless you're in an undoubtedly safe place around people you know well and absolutely trust. Don't accept drinks from strangers.

Posted
I beg to differ, exactly what purpose would rape serve if sex was not involved? IF a man wants mere power over us then all he needs to do is hit us or steal from us, this comment makes no sense and I hear it all too often. Rape is ABOUT SEX the majority of the time, otherwise nobody would do it.

 

Sex is the weapon but men don't rape because they are horny. They rape because it is an act of violence against a woman.

Posted
Sex is the weapon but men don't rape because they are horny. They rape because it is an act of violence against a woman.

 

Or violence against a man.

 

Prison inmates don't rape other inmates because they just can't resist that nice butt in an orange jumpsuit. It's a violent act of domination. Sex is the weapon, and it's a very powerful one. In prisons, specifically, rape establishes a hierarchy in a way that other forms of physical violence (beatings) can't really do. Most people find it more degrading to be raped than beaten up, and that's where the power comes from.

Posted
Yeah you know what you're right... I want to see a return. they were hired to be cops not politicians. I want real cops....you want paper cops. Real cops dont pussy foot around...they inform as it is and they get sh*t done. Paper cops just pander to the media, dance around and get f*ckall done. Oh but thy sure can dance...

 

This happened in the city where I'm from. These days the cops (the upper brass especially) have been catching flack for being too political and not enough serve and protect. This guy was brought in as a specialist in this area...he deals with this DAILY; you think there might be something he might know about this? He was specifically told by his political superiors not to mention this at all. He acknowledges this YET openly defies them. Now WHY would someone openly defy specific orders like that? Do you really think he said that just to rattle some cages? to what end?

 

My take is he got sick and tired of having to play the political games; I have a lot of friends who are cops and they absolutely hate it because it just does nothing but tie everything up. He likely got tired of this because he joined the force to SERVE AND PROTECT not play games...so he said what needed to be said because there IS some truth surrounding this in certain situations....thats the sh*t h deals with every day.... THATS service

 

 

 

WTF....I'm about this close to giving you a taste of your own medicine but I'll hold my tongue because I know you wouldn't be able to take it

 

 

 

Apples and oranges

 

 

 

:confused::eek::rolleyes::confused::eek::confused::confused:

 

 

hahahhahahahaha

 

Pray tell, how is taking a report and bringing in a reported rapist just "being political"?

 

These conclusions you arrive at..... mind boggling.

 

Heads up. I've never been raped and I get that how I conduct myself is some part of the reason I've avoided this. But impersonal rape victims are not exclusively chicks running around in lacy bits and precursory skirts. In fact, a self defense course did warn of a particularly targeted by would be rapists item of clothing but I'm guessing you'd be surprised at what that item was. It wasn't tube tops. It wasn't back seamed stockings or a too short skirt. It was bib overalls. BIB FRIGGIN OVERALLS! It is the most highly targeted item of apparel in rape cases.

And they warned of hot spots to be extra aware of your surrounding when you happened to need to be there. It wasn't night clubs or frat house parties; places where tacky clothing is common and it wasn't dark alleys in seedy neighborhoods either. It was parking garages.

 

So there you are, wedged between two cars in your bib overalls just signaling in big neon lights that you wanna get raped - right? No, you're not thinking about it the way a rapist would. He won't care what she is wearing just as he won't care that she protests.

 

Most rape is date rape. As someone mentioned before, most rape victims know their rapist. Someone who already wants to do with them as they desire, the courting dance in session, and there she is dressed nicer than if she was just popping over to the market. Citing a woman's attire is the thin excuse of an impatient monster pretending to be a man. She could have been wearing anything. Why don't we just advise women everywhere to never go on dates? Shut up and do your job!

 

That cop just wasn't thinking about this ****. When the victim happens to be dressed a bit skimpier that your everyday attire, he is right there with the attitude of "well that's what you get". Pfft. Shut up and do your job!

  • Author
Posted (edited)
Pray tell, how is taking a report and bringing in a reported rapist just "being political"?

 

:confused: So now we are talking about the process of taking a report? oy vey

 

 

 

Heads up. I've never been raped and I get that how I conduct myself is some part of the reason I've avoided this.

Ok so you agree.....whats your point?

 

But impersonal rape victims are not exclusively chicks running around in lacy bits and precursory skirts.

 

Who said that it was??? he didnt...Nobody on this thread is saying that.... again whats your point as it relates to this discussion?

 

 

Most rape is date rape. As someone mentioned before, most rape victims know their rapist.
Most perhaps.. but not all.... apparently you seem to understand this in the 2nd quote above.....so whats your point?

 

That cop just wasn't thinking about this ****.
What makes you so sure of that? You think that was all he had to say?? How do you know it wasn't just part of a long list of talking points but they decided to pile on him for that ONE point?

 

When the victim happens to be dressed a bit skimpier that your everyday attire, he is right there with the attitude of "well that's what you get". Pfft. Shut up and do your job!
LMAO Edited by StoneCold
Posted
:confused: So now we are talking about the process of taking a report? oy vey

 

 

 

 

Ok so you agree.....whats your point?

 

 

 

Who said that it was??? he didnt...Nobody on this thread is saying that.... again whats your point as it relates to this discussion?

 

 

Most perhaps.. but not all.... apparently you seem to understand this in the 2nd quote above.....so whats your point?

 

What makes you so sure of that? You think that was all he had to say?? How do you know it wasn't just part of a long list of talking points but they decided to pile on him for that ONE point?

 

LMAO

 

Not going to bother when you ignore that its bib overalls that get targeted well more than what the cop is saying. When what you say holds no water AND blames the victim, you should just shut up and do your job.

  • Author
Posted (edited)
Not going to bother when you ignore that its bib overalls that get targeted well more than what the cop is saying.

 

That story was used to "substantiate" a point which I addressed...why dont you read?

 

When what you say holds no water

Sure... yet you apparently live by it to some degree as quoted in my previous post.... :rolleyes:

 

Ironic...But this could just be a result of you actually not know what I'm saying at all

 

 

blames the victim, you should just shut up and do your job.

 

No...you THINK it blames the victim...which is a shame for many many reasons

Edited by StoneCold
Posted

It's really a confusing mess.

 

Society would like us to believe that we're "sexually liberated." Are we? If we have to blame women for being women, and having women-ly body parts, aren't we sexually repressed?

 

I am all for sexual liberation, but you can't have the door swing both ways. You can't have women fighting for equal rights in the world and also in the bedroom, and also have the rights of women be unequal to men. It just can't happen.

 

I wear glasses and have long hair and a beard. I also listen to heavy metal and progressive rock. Would some people assume that I'm a drug addict? Yeah, probably. That doesn't erase the fact that I'm completely anti-drug, and have never even so much as smoked a cigarette, let alone done any drugs outside of the prescription kind. I don't even like to drink - had a beer at the concert I went to two nights ago, and while I enjoyed it, I don't crave it.

 

Appearances aren't everything, and just because someone dresses provocatively (in your opinion), doesn't mean they're ready to spread their legs for you or any guy.

Posted

This thread is super interesting and obviously a really hot topic for a lot of people, but I think the real reasons people are getting upset have been somewhat over looked. Many people in the thread have said exactly these things, over and over, but have been mocked for simplification. The officer's statement itself was an over simplification of an obvious extremely complicated issue.

Also I have a problem with the word 'slutty'. What exactly does that mean? At a beach, during a hot summer day, a bikini would never be called slutty by the vast majority of our society. Similarly merely wearing a low cut dress, though it touches the ground, could be condemned as 'slutty' in certain social situations. The broad generalization that one specific way of dressing is 'slutty', which by definition is an adjective used to describe a woman who acts like a whore, is ridiculous.

Basically the police officer's unthinking statement demonstrates two things:

1. it shows this broad underlying idea in our society that a rape victim has somehow brought it upon themselves by either their actions, or manner of dressing. Example 'if only they had resisted the urge to wear 'slutty' clothing, they would have been safe.'

2. Likewise it enforces this bizarre stereotype that men are both unable to control themselves when presented with a woman dressed in an abstractly described 'slutty' fashion, and that they can somehow escape some of the blame for acting on their baser, natural instincts. Example of this is the blonde, female journalist in Egypt who was separated, beaten and raped then blamed for putting herself in a situation where such a thing was bound to happen. The Egyptian men could obviously not control themselves when presented with a blonde women, dressed in a non conservatively (for Egypt) fashion.

 

I agree that the poor guy obviously did not intend to villify women for getting themselves raped, but his in unthinking statement he demonstrated the severe need for more education and more understanding about how in the first place such a statement could possibly be made.

Posted
Rape has nothing to do with how a woman dresses. A woman should be able to dress light on a hot day without worrying if she is going to be raped or not. Rape is about power not sex anyway. It's not about how horny a man is.

 

There is nothing to understand. You know I am not Mr feminist but a woman should not be raped based on how she dresses. Blame the rapists and hold them accountable. Once again this is an example of a society that does not want to blame person who commited the action.

 

Really, Woggle sums it up right here, in these two posts, except I want to add: Men are raped, too. Women are raped in higher numbers, but of course, they aren't the only victims. Children are also raped, and it's not because they're wearing club-wear.

 

To those who talk about "common sense" (i.e. people lock their doors), I agree in teaching women common sense ways to avoid rapists, such as not leaving a drink wide open (always have a friend watch your drink or carry it with your hand near the top in a busy club, etc), staying alert, going out with friends, and taking care not to be alone with men you cannot trust. You can advise these things without faulting victims. People shouldn't have to worry about it, just like I shouldn't have to worry about having my car stolen, but I still lock my car doors. I don't think anyone is against advice that would increase safety, particularly while maintaining their own freedom in the process.

 

This guy wasn't giving safety tips. He was giving justification for the crime. And he was also making the crime more about sex (and sexual attractiveness) than it is. A girl looking attractive and showing skin does not turn a man into a rapist. Almost every study of rape and psychology in every nation, across cultural borders, tells us that. He has no factual basis for his opinions. And it's not about safety. Cloaking it in that does a disservice to freedom, to healthy men (who are more than able to control themselves when they see a sexy woman), to victims of rape, and to safety itself. It's all based on a false idea that has no substantiated reality.

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