gf gone for good.

[monkeynuts]

right things are finally over with my ex. only been together around 5 months but met online and fell inlove with eachother. 1h 45m distance between us so we spent every weekend together, went away for a short break and I even spent 9 days on the trot round hers. so our bond grew very deep.

anyhow from the beginning trust issues came up on both sides. Before we even met she was insecure with me though it didnt put me off.

anyhow went through a bad time over christmas. i admitted i looked through her itemised bill. she had to have an abortion due to her illness so a very very rough time for us both.

anyhow worked through that and met up again though ended up arguing. anyhow to get to the chase I looked on her facebook behind her back and she had messaged her ex. I went over to hers to get my stuff and end it. she was very upset and didnt want it to be. decided to go on a break for abit and let the air settle.

anyhow after I said NO contact for few days she texts me the next night...at this stage i already regret breaking up and gather things will sort themselves out.....how wrong was I.

Since then she has completely changed. one miute she will be happy to text/talk the next she wouldnt be.

she would say she didnt know if she wanted to be with me as too much had happened. said she didnt want to see me etc, admitted she was really down and felt depressed.

one day I finished work early and said Id come up to see her, got told NO. but the guy iam i was so worried about her I drove all the way up only to be contronted with an angry person telling me I dont listen.

over the two weeks its been crazy. she may text me but not as much, not really showing an interest in me. when I phone her she gets funny and constantly says Im pushing her.

My friends family say just walk away and let her do the chasing...but because Im inlove with her I thought I was right and done my own thing.

her birthday came, bought her flowers as a surprise and she was over the moon, phoned me up in work (which she hadnt done in over a month) started calling me my pet name again and texted all night

thought great thigns are looking up.

then i so say pushed the subject of meeting up and she went back to how she was. that night she was nasty to me, told me she never wanted to see me again or ever be with me again. it hurt so much to hear her say this.

So next dya I was a mess, deleted her as a friend on facebook and went out with my friends. that night she text me saying oh she noticed i deleted her off facebook and thats my choice. she hopes ill be happy and more or less bye. signed with her pet name for me and sayin she will now be gone forever.

sent a few more messages and by the end she said it isnt easy to wlak away but she cant be with me right now so has to let me go???? I was like what....explain.

told me she couldnt but would meet me the following friday...I was like

slept on it and text her agreeing a time and place.

didnt text/talk over the weekend until sunday night. spent over an hour on hte phone and it felt good again. spoke on monday again things were good.

trouble sent me a email telling me she is this that and the other. also someone on a fake account on facebook sent her friends messages asking about her. we were both anoyed and kinda freaked out as to who the hell it would be.

anyhow she wasnt in hte best of moods that night but I brought up about friday and she said well yes i havent said im not meeting u.

got a phonecall from her yesterday more or less accusing me of being the person on facebook. I pointed out that the questions this 'FAKE PERSON' was asking for one I knew all the asnwers....secondly why would I do it considering how things were between us. and why on earth would i when the messages were sent to her best friend and this guy she use to date.

anyhow more or less said another reason she was ringin was to sya forget about friday. to much '****' had happened and she never wants to get back with me. never wants to see me again and wants me to leave her alone

anyhow phoned her up last night as i wanted to get some things of my chest...not nasty things but to point out that I wasnt this ******* she thought I was. that I too just had trust issues and after everything over xmas I just needed her to be there for me. and be patient with me as i was dealing with the emotional side of it aswell. anyhow at first she was aggressive, saying I couldnt change her mind so no matter what it wouldnt work.

More or less poured my heart out to her, she calmed down alot. I explained that I was selfish, i did listen to everything she said and that I did care for her. she said if we were together I wouldnt of bought her flowers for her birthday (its like yes I would)

she owns two dogs who I loved to bits, I use to walk them, buy them toys,food and even help build there room. yet got accused of not bothering with her dogs.

she mroe or less aid I never listen, I only think about myself and only do what I want. that its all my fault we are in the situation we are in now. yes she lied and made a mistake by texting that guy, but Ive made more mistakes. and she can never trust me again.

It hurt alot as other the last few weeks she has played me for a complete fool. my family and friends said to me to just leave her alone but I didnt listen.

we got off the phone last night after I said how I felt...she left it that we would speak soon. text her sayin i missed her and sorry how everything had turnt out.

got a text bk saying night (then my pet name) with a x on the end.

kinda thought I might of gotten through to her.

phoned her in work today and straight away its 'why are you ringin me' i told you nothing would change my mind'

I said to her what was the text about and saying we would speak soon. told her it had got my hopes up and got a mouthful of 'well lets delete eachothers number and never ring text again' said to her how is it so easy for u to walk away...said its not but she will deal with it.

I told her she knew what I wanted as i told her as soon as we broke up, yet she has just stringed me along (or that what it feels like)

havent spoken to her since. Im at a complete lost as to what to think here people.

I made stupid mistakes yes, Im human I cant help it. but so did she. I feeling so many emotions its unreal. hurt/betrayed/fool/angry/sad/upset the list goes on.

Im sorry for such a long message but i need to vent somewhere. my mind is a complete state and I miss this girl so much. even after everything in my head we could of got through it. but obviously she never felt as strong towards me as i did her.

My mum and sister know everything as ive spoken to them about it. thye have said to me she seems very immature for her age of 25. that Im better off without her and to move on. but crikey its hard. when you spend fri-mon with someone solid to suddenly lose them and not have any contact atall sucks.

havent felt this poo in a long long time. cant focus on stuff. my mind always wonders to her.

to be told hurtful things by someone you love so much is an experience i dont think you can explain. On the night we agreed to go on a break (i ended it) she poured her heart out to me....that was jsut under 4 weeks ago....now she is like this. i kind of feel like i was sucked in and it was all lies because if i ever ment that much to her how can she turn her back on me?

God this feels crap.... a few people has said ot me she will contact me in the future....but i doubt it....i dont even know if Id want to now.

 

help

[JasonRules]

You guys aren't compatible, plus you don't trust each other. Who looks at itemized bills anyway?

 

Move on...