pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 So, I've been kind of bummed about being "rejected" by this new guy I've been dating, because I just told him I have herpes. (I'll get over it.) Anyway, his online dating profile says he is my age. But, I found his profile on an old social-networking site, and on that, it says his age is two years older than indicated on the dating site??? This profile also says he graduated from college in 1998, which backs up this idea, since I graduated college in 2000. WTF? Was he lying??
tigressA Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Any way you slice it, there's clearly a disparity--he has been lying. People who lie about something like their age, IMO, have no qualms with lying about anything else. You dodged a bullet.
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 Any way you slice it, there's clearly a disparity--he has been lying. People who lie about something like their age, IMO, have no qualms with lying about anything else. You dodged a bullet. I also found his MySpace profile that says the same thing -- two years older. I'm not jumping to conclusions, am I? Who lies about their age on Friendster and MySpace, especially when these are old profiles from years ago? There's no reason to lie about your age when you're in your 20s. I remember asking him when he moved to NY, and he said 1999. And I was like, "Wait, we're the same age, weren't you still in college in 2000?" I remember him looking sort of blank and then said: "Well, I'm one of those people who went to college early." Lies. His profile says he graduated from college in 1998. I cannot believe this! Here I was being painfully honest about something very personal -- revealing I have a STD -- and he's been lying about his age??? How long would he think he could keep up this charade? I'm disgusted.
Duckduckgoose Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 In this case herpes saved the day! Otherwise he would have probably lied more about other things! This is a good example for people who date... they need to check the DL of the person they date as proof of age.
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 Why on earth would you lie about your age by TWO YEARS? That's make NO sense to me.
Lilmisus Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 So, I've been kind of bummed about being "rejected" by this new guy I've been dating, because I just told him I have herpes. (I'll get over it.) Anyway, his online dating profile says he is my age. But, I found his profile on an old social-networking site, and on that, it says his age is two years older than indicated on the dating site??? This profile also says he graduated from college in 1998, which backs up this idea, since I graduated college in 2000. WTF? Was he lying?? I'm wondering which social-networking site it was? Was it Myspace or something of the likes where it tells you the last time that they logged on? If it was Myspace, I remember how years ago, most people did lie about their age, regardless of if they were teenagers in high school, in their twenties, or old men/women. There was one guy who I was interested in years ago, and apparently he had created a couple of accounts, and both said different ages (one was his actual age, another two years older). What for, I don't know, but he's been long gone so it doesn't even matter now. My point is, is that he may not have lied to YOU about his age (and even if he did, he's done and gone now, so it doesn't even matter anymore) he may have just lied on there for some reason at the time. Or another option to consider is someone else made it for him and put his age different than it actually was on accident and he never got around to changing it, which happens more times than you'd think. But, I don't know what site you were talking of, so I can't be sure if this does apply to you or not. Regardless, kiss this loser goodbye and don't waste another moment worrying or looking him up online for whatever reason. He lied either now or then and that should be just another reason to not give him another thought.
dressing up Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 I'm not defending him but could it be that he skipped some grades to go to college early?
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 I'm wondering which social-networking site it was? Was it Myspace or something of the likes where it tells you the last time that they logged on? If it was Myspace, I remember how years ago, most people did lie about their age, regardless of if they were teenagers in high school, in their twenties, or old men/women. There was one guy who I was interested in years ago, and apparently he had created a couple of accounts, and both said different ages (one was his actual age, another two years older). What for, I don't know, but he's been long gone so it doesn't even matter now. My point is, is that he may not have lied to YOU about his age (and even if he did, he's done and gone now, so it doesn't even matter anymore) he may have just lied on there for some reason at the time. Or another option to consider is someone else made it for him and put his age different than it actually was on accident and he never got around to changing it, which happens more times than you'd think. But, I don't know what site you were talking of, so I can't be sure if this does apply to you or not. Regardless, kiss this loser goodbye and don't waste another moment worrying or looking him up online for whatever reason. He lied either now or then and that should be just another reason to not give him another thought. It was MySpace and Friendster. Plus, as I stated before, one of these profiles stated that he graduated college two years earlier than me. That's the biggest proof I have.
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 I'm not defending him but could it be that he skipped some grades to go to college early? That is possible, but that doesn't make up for the age discrepancy. If he skipped some grades, we'd have to be the same age.
tigressA Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 In this case herpes saved the day! Otherwise he would have probably lied more about other things! This is a good example for people who date... they need to check the DL of the person they date as proof of age. I do this every single time I'm out with someone new, without fail. I start in on mentioning something like embarrassing photos (and pretty much everyone thinks their license photo is embarrassing) and they'll mention theirs. I'll ask to see it and then I sneak a peek at the birth date. If there's a disparity, I don't go out with them again. I haven't gone out with anyone yet who lied about their age to me, but there was one guy I had a fling with months ago who recently rejoined the site we had met on and listed his age as 2 years younger. Classy.
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 I haven't gone out with anyone yet who lied about their age to me, but there was one guy I had a fling with months ago who recently rejoined the site we had met on and listed his age as 2 years younger. Classy. This is what boggles my mind -- why two years?? It is so insignificant!
tigressA Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 This is what boggles my mind -- why two years?? It is so insignificant! In my experience, the guy(s) I've known who have done this at one point or another have lied when they're pushing 30--in the case of the guy I mentioned above, he's turning 29 in the spring. He listed himself as 26. I also noticed that he was looking for women with a minimum age of 20. Perhaps they think they would attract "fresher" prospects by lying about being younger. A couple of years when you're close to 30 makes a pretty big difference for a lot of younger women. I know if I were 20 or 21 I'd prefer a 26-yr-old to a 28- or 29-yr.-old.
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 In my experience, the guy(s) I've known who have done this at one point or another have lied when they're pushing 30--in the case of the guy I mentioned above, he's turning 29 in the spring. He listed himself as 26. I also noticed that he was looking for women with a minimum age of 20. Perhaps they think they would attract "fresher" prospects by lying about being younger. A couple of years when you're close to 30 makes a pretty big difference for a lot of younger women. I know if I were 20 or 21 I'd prefer a 26-yr-old to a 28- or 29-yr.-old. Well, this guy says he is 32, but likely 34. There is no big difference in that! It's so weird, we match up so well on OKCupid, like 95%. He believes in love, says he's looking for someone to have children with, does not believe in cheating -- all signs point to a stand up guy. Could I be wrong? I see he started his online profiles in 2003, which would have made me 26 back then. No reason to make yourself two years younger when you're 26, right?
CoralRain Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 It does seem like such a big difference in being 29 and 30. Even though it is only a year a part. Oh well.
Eeyore79 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Well, this guy says he is 32, but likely 34. There is no big difference in that! 32 is "just over 30" (because people will round down in their minds), whereas 34 is "almost 35 - mid thirties - eek!" (because people will round up in their minds). So the difference between 32-34 is perceived to be more like the difference between 30-35.
mustofbeen Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 I don't see why you making a big deal about it, the main picture is you guys will never go out, it's done deal, let it go, don't worry about something that you'll never figure out, because humans are not mind readers, and others will only guess why he did it, so unless you ask him personally and unless he will tell you the truth, you will never find out why he lied. SO just let it go.
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 I don't see why you making a big deal about it, the main picture is you guys will never go out, it's done deal, let it go, don't worry about something that you'll never figure out, because humans are not mind readers, and others will only guess why he did it, so unless you ask him personally and unless he will tell you the truth, you will never find out why he lied. SO just let it go. The reason I feel so indignant, is because I was extremely honest with him about something very personal. The fact that he lied about something so insignificant as his age... well, it's the principle of the matter.
Author pandagirl Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 32 is "just over 30" (because people will round down in their minds), whereas 34 is "almost 35 - mid thirties - eek!" (because people will round up in their minds). So the difference between 32-34 is perceived to be more like the difference between 30-35. I guess I can see that for younger people, but since I'm 32, there is no difference to me. He has his dating age range set to 26-33.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Dated someone who was 28 at the time- he should be 30 by now but he's posting ads and profiles that lists he's 27. Kind of stupid if you ask me, shows how insecure men are about their age.
carhill Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Hey, PG, good on ya for giving dating another go and kudos for being proactive on the HSV status. Sorry this guy apparently wasn't a good match on a number of levels. Based on a good suggestion in another thread, I've included my accurate age and gender right below my avatar, which is similar to what I included in my last online dating profile. The cheeks might still be as cute but the face has aged a bit
Star Gazer Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Panda, can I ask why you are going and looking up dirt on him after he ended things? Are you trying to look for a personal defect he has (lying) that would explain his decision not to move forward in light of your disclosure about herpes? I understand te desire to make the rejection about "him," but the two issues probably aren't related.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Hey, PG, good on ya for giving dating another go and kudos for being proactive on the HSV status. Sorry this guy apparently wasn't a good match on a number of levels. Based on a good suggestion in another thread, I've included my accurate age and gender right below my avatar, which is similar to what I included in my last online dating profile. The cheeks might still be as cute but the face has aged a bit Carhill I'm surprised you're not a father... you would raise wise daughters and sons.
PeachyPink Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 I joined a forum decades ago, and never updated my age- just forgot about it. It still says I'm 27. Not trying to hide anything, just never updated it because it wasn't really relevant to the forum content.
tigressA Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 (edited) I joined a forum decades ago, and never updated my age- just forgot about it. It still says I'm 27. Not trying to hide anything, just never updated it because it wasn't really relevant to the forum content. On social networking sites like MySpace, and on dating sites, your age updates automatically because you've given them your birth date. This was intentional deception, not a case of absent-mindedness. Edited February 16, 2011 by tigressA
carhill Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Carhill I'm surprised you're not a father... you would raise wise daughters and sons. Hey, I gave it my best shot. Sometimes nature opts certain potentials out of the genetic process. AFAIK, none of the women I dated as a result of meeting online ever lied about their age. I know my exW certainly didn't. TBH, even if they did, and we got on and enjoyed each other, I really wouldn't care. Lying about their marital status, OTOH, is a whole different can of worms. BTST. Of course, that's the perspective of a 51 yo, so YMMV.
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