Nexus One Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Count me in as a spoiled princess. I like a guy who wants to make me happy. Cos I'm a pretty giving person and I hate the thought of throwing that away on a guy who's selfish and undeserving. OP, most of the guys on here are bitter and sad. I still stand on what I say. Am I understanding you both correctly? So you're saying that if a man and woman, who have roughly equal incomes, split bills 50/50, then the guy is selfish and bitter? He should actually be paying for all of it and then he's no longer selfish and bitter? Because taking the context into account that's what you both seem to be saying.
Duckduckgoose Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 me me me me,what do u give aside from breast and vagina? Isn't breast and vagina enough? If you don't like it go find a gay man and put your dick in his ass J/k of course. Not all women act like entitled princesses. I get pissy if someone pays too much for me. I will INSIST to pay for the next night out. I also don't want them holding my damn door:rolleyes:
Gypsy_Soul Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Good luck finding your doormat. Thanks, and if he ever starts sounding like you, I'll know I'm doing something wrong and he'll need a good spanking!
Knittress Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 It's about the emotional quality of being generous with yourself. It's gestures of esteem and goodwill. You give a little, you get a little. It's a dance of flirtation. It's romance. Guys on here who talk about shoving drinks at a woman like quarters down a slot machine... well, they just don't know a thing. Of course they lose. It's a rigged game they're playing.
Gypsy_Soul Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 It's about the emotional quality of being generous with yourself. It's gestures of esteem and goodwill. You give a little, you get a little. It's a dance of flirtation. It's romance. Guys on here who talk about shoving drinks at a woman like quarters down a slot machine... well, they just don't know a thing. Of course they lose. It's a rigged game they're playing. This! Thanks!
musemaj11 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Not all women act like entitled princesses. I get pissy if someone pays too much for me. I will INSIST to pay for the next night out. Thats all I ask from a woman. I want someone who appreciates my generosity and eager to return the generosity. Its called mutual appreciation. Men, I believe a person's behavior during dating period is a foreshadow of his/her behavior in a marriage and a divorce. A woman who feels that she is entitled to everything you have before marriage is going to be the woman who takes everything you have in a marriage and a divorce.
Woggle Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 What exactly should a woman do for a man who is willing to spoil her? I know relationships should not be about tit for tat but what exactly does she give him?
musemaj11 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Thanks, and if he ever starts sounding like you, I'll know I'm doing something wrong and he'll need a good spanking! Any man deserves a spanking just for wanting to be with you in the first place.
Untouchable_Fire Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 It's about the emotional quality of being generous with yourself. It's gestures of esteem and goodwill. You give a little, you get a little. It's a dance of flirtation. It's romance. Guys on here who talk about shoving drinks at a woman like quarters down a slot machine... well, they just don't know a thing. Of course they lose. It's a rigged game they're playing. This is just the crap you tell yourself to ignore what it's really about. Power and Dominance. Those who can't and won't pay for themselves will never be more than second class.
musemaj11 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 All the women in this thread are a massive disappointment. What does it say if a guy has to buy you? As I said, most women r no more than children. Their point of view is one way street. Children can't understand what could be the reason that their parents refuse to buy them the toys they want. The same thing with women. They are incapable to understand what could be the reason when men refuse to meet their one-sided romantic fantasies because they are only capable of thinking how something makes them feel, not how it makes the other persons feel. Also women who pay under feminist motivation is just as selfish as women don't pay at all because inherently its still about u not the other person. A truly selfless n generous person pays because she cares about the other person not because she is trying to make a point.
Knittress Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 This is just the crap you tell yourself to ignore what it's really about. Power and Dominance. Those who can't and won't pay for themselves will never be more than second class. Power and Dominance? ::cough:: While I agree that this sounds kinda hot, I'm glad my mind isn't fixed in such hierarchical terms. I'm a woman and I enjoy being treated like a woman. I am soft-hearted, playful and don't like aggressive or cold behavior - most men appreciate this about me. Those that don't.... whatevs. This has nothing to do with my abilities or aptitudes. I don't have to act like a man in order to take care of myself - that's what I like about feminism.
musemaj11 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 As much as I hate most women for expecting handouts, I admit that these women do what they do because most men allow it. In Europe, they have true gender equality because all the men expect the women to meet them halfway. I guess European men arent doormats like most American men. So European women learned that they needed to meet the men halfway if they wanted a man. In the end, the practice became the norm and now everyone is happy.
LittleTiger Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Jane100, I'm in the UK and if a guy asked me out and then asked me to pay half and told me it was going to cost me £60 I'd back out - that's way too much. You can get a great meal for two, where I live, for £60 including a couple of drinks each. I'd happily spend £30 on a good night out with someone who's company I enjoyed. However - if it was supposed to be a date I'd be unimpressed with his 'style'. Suggesting going dutch, in my view, is not about the money. It's about the man's attitude towards the woman and it feeds 'friendship' not romance. If a man can't afford the date he's suggesting he should find somewhere less expensive. I'm one of the cheapest dates around because I'm just as happy taking the dog for a walk as I am going out for a romantic meal. A date should be about getting to know someone, not about trying to impress them. Carhill is right when he talks about compatibility. If a guy suggests an ice-cream and a stroll on the beach as a date and the girl thinks he's cheap - the relationship is doomed. The same goes for a girl who expects the guy to pay and is then asked to go dutch.
waynebrady Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Men who give to please his woman deserve to be loved, cherished, adored, given affection and attention. It goes both ways, it's not one-sided....STEVE Women need to learn how to treat men as well. That's why everyone is all screwed up. Reading your and posts from every other woman it sure doesn't seem that way. What exactly is it that you women give back anyway? Affection? Can't be that because women never initiate affection, but I suppose the man should be lucky if he was just allowed to hug you for 1 second. Love? Can't be that either, because it's a well known fact that the man loves the woman more than vice versa. It has been confirmed by women such as yourself that you do infact want the man to love you more than you love him. But I have accepted that as a part of nature, it's biology, women aren't capable of feeling as strongly about a man as vice versa. Attention? In what way? Him giving YOU attention doesn't equate to you giving him attention. Women don't give any attention to their man, who does the calling? texting? does all the romantic things? It sure ain't ever the woman. No matter how many times you women say it isn't one sided, I only need to read your posts to see that it is infact one sided and it certenley doesn't go both ways.
waynebrady Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 For the record, I'm British and I would like to pay. It's a shame it isn't as common here as in the states. Especcially considering us British and europeans pretty much invented that practise anyway. The idea that the man should pay for the date did not originally come from the US. Yet they seem to be the one who does it mostly, which I applaud. Some men seem to have the idea that men who pay for dates and give expensive gifts are door-mats. I disagree. If I pay it shows that I have the upper-hand financially. Women have the upper-hand in everything else, so I see me paying as an advantage for me.
Untouchable_Fire Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Power and Dominance? ::cough:: While I agree that this sounds kinda hot, I'm glad my mind isn't fixed in such hierarchical terms. I'm a woman and I enjoy being treated like a woman. I am soft-hearted, playful and don't like aggressive or cold behavior - most men appreciate this about me. Those that don't.... whatevs. This has nothing to do with my abilities or aptitudes. I don't have to act like a man in order to take care of myself - that's what I like about feminism. If your definition of being treated like a woman HAS to include having things paid for you... what does that imply about you? Personally, I don't define femininity as the inability to pay for meals. It's the positive traits you list above that I value in a woman, and I don't feel it should be required to pay $$$ to experience them. In fact by putting a price on it... the whole thing stops being special and instead just becomes another transaction.
waynebrady Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 As much as I hate most women for expecting handouts, I admit that these women do what they do because most men allow it. In Europe, they have true gender equality because all the men expect the women to meet them halfway. I guess European men arent doormats like most American men. So European women learned that they needed to meet the men halfway if they wanted a man. In the end, the practice became the norm and now everyone is happy. I have always had the impression that American women are alot more "princessy" than British women. They except the man to give and give without getting anything back, I just had to read GorgeousGirl's posts to see that. I think British women are more down to earth, loving and affectionate than American women. I don't know about the rest of europe though.
musemaj11 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 As the great Greek philosopher Aristotle said, "Feminists are silent when the bill arrives." :laugh:
denise_xo Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Hi OP, As others have pointed out, it's common in Europe, including the UK, to go dutch. The set up is quite different from the US. However, I agree with what LittleTiger said on the issue of 'style'. The way he's going about it sounds weird. Is there a particular reason why he wants to do something that's so expensive? Is this a special event of any kind?
oaks Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Jane100, I'm in the UK and if a guy asked me out and then asked me to pay half and told me it was going to cost me £60 I'd back out - that's way too much. You can get a great meal for two, where I live, for £60 including a couple of drinks each. I'd happily spend £30 on a good night out with someone who's company I enjoyed. I agree about the price... a £60 (per person) meal sounds like too much for an early date. Even in London you can easily get a great meal and drinks for £30 per person or less. Of course there are also some great restaurants that'll cost twice that or more, but I also know a place where I can sit down and eat pizza for less than £6.
Purplehaze Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 So is this like a new feminist movement, going dutch? If it is then this changes everything. If you want to be equal to a man then I must give you advice just like I would a man. If you can't afford to date, then don't! If you disagree with something, then negotiate and express your disagreements as to why you can't afford this type of date. Be assertive like a man. Equal!
LittleTiger Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 I also know a place where I can sit down and eat pizza for less than £6. Exactly. If a guy asked me on a date by saying "I know a great little place we can get an awesome pizza - do you fancy coming with me on Saturday....?" I'd accept without hesitation. On the other hand, if he said "I know a fabulous restaurant but it's a bit pricey - we could go there Saturday night if you can pay half" the answer would probably be 'no thanks'..... and it would have nothing to do with the cost of the meal.
PerpetualMotion Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 As much as I hate most women for expecting handouts, I admit that these women do what they do because most men allow it. In Europe, they have true gender equality because all the men expect the women to meet them halfway. I guess European men arent doormats like most American men. So European women learned that they needed to meet the men halfway if they wanted a man. In the end, the practice became the norm and now everyone is happy. European here. Unfortunately, what you say about European men not being doormats isn't true. I'd say that a good number of the married guys I know are doormats and probably some of those that aren't, aren't simply because they are actually married to nice, considerate women. Personally, a woman expecting me to pay, especially during the first few dates, is a turn off. I get the feeling that I'm paying just to get them interested in me. On the other hand, I don't expect my dates to pay for £60 meals per person. After those initial dates, I don't mind paying.
musemaj11 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 I have the feeling that the guy probably doesn't know that she is not that financially capable. After all they barely know each other. Perhaps she looks quite well off from the outside and he just assumed that she is indeed well off.
Gypsy_Soul Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 This whole dutch thing is new to me and a total turn-off. I agree, I guess it's all about different 'dating styles' and what one is compatible with. I would laugh at such a suggestion though. As funny as it may be it is quite sad to me. Well, I've never had a problem with that. Every date the gentleman has been generous in his gestures. When I am on here posting or adding my two cents, I always have plenty dating adventures and experiences to share. I can't say the same for some of the angry and bitter fellows that frequent LS. They usually have something negative to say or complain about. I hope they find dates. I have no need to prove this as it has been done for me and will continue to do so. I have to get ready for my day as I do have a life and dates to enjoy. With all that said there are plenty of men that believe in old-fashioned dating, courting or whatever you want to call it. I have always had the impression that American women are alot more "princessy" than British women. They except the man to give and give without getting anything back, I just had to read GorgeousGirl's posts to see that. I think British women are more down to earth, loving and affectionate than American women. I don't know about the rest of europe though. Yet, you have dating troubles and resort to porn! What a laugh:rolleyes: Okay that was mean, but just keeping it real. Sometimes, I gotta go hard, some men cry more than girls. Waaah.
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