Roadlesstaken Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Ok, got the idea to start this thread from Cee. What are the reasons that you have heard for not texting/calling from someone you have dated, met etc? The one that I have heard the most is "I have been busy". Ok we have all been busy, but busy 24/7 for 6 days straight? Yeah right.
Duckduckgoose Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 He's just not that into you. Its so stupidly easy to contact people nowadays if he wanted to talk to you he would.
Author Roadlesstaken Posted February 15, 2011 Author Posted February 15, 2011 He's just not that into you. Its so stupidly easy to contact people nowadays if he wanted to talk to you he would. Exactly. I got the message when I didn't receive a call or text.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Modern phones come equipped with speeddial... Then there are the " smartphones"- 4g capability with messaging convenience. So unless they're really not all that tech savvy and surviving on 2g phones with terrible messaging functions, I don't see how anyone can excuse themselves from replying- unless they're really just avoiding you in the first place?
LifesBeachy Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 I've gotten the busy excuse... OR I've gotten them dancing around an answer and never actually giving any excuse. I've sent delayed replies when I've been backed up on things or burnt out mentally.. I want to make sure I give a formal reply and document my reason though.. I find it so rude when people just give me the truncated "I was busy..." I figure since their life is oh-so-backed up, I better step out of their way. One guy told me he was in the mountains and didn't really have signal. Really? Funny considering he posted to his Twitter. FROM his PHONE saying he was on top of a MOUNTAIN! He could have easily sent me the same message...but after I found this tidbit out, I was pretty fumed.
phineas Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Women play the "busy" game with me all the time. it's annoying so if she is taking 10 mins to respond to a text when she just sent me one I basically put my phone down & carry on with what i'm doing. I can't be bothered to stop what i'm doing every 10 mins. to play text games with a woman. But, worst case i'll get back to them next day if I wanted to talk to them.
Cee Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 The most audacious busy texts I got from a guy I dated right before my current boyfriend. I talked about this is the other thread, but I'll spell it out for hilarity. After 10 days of NC (and 2 weeks after our 2nd/final date), he texts on a Saturday night at 10:30 pm. "Hey, I've been busy helping my parents pack up for their trip to Florida. How is your weekend" What did he expect me to say? "So sorry to hear how busy you have been. Helping your parents for TWO weeks. Should I drop everything and come by?" I ignored the text. Then a week later on a Friday night, I was walking home from a party and walked by him. At that point, I had nothing to say to him so I pretended not to see him. He texted me two days later... "On my way to Bermuda today. Pretty much tied up loose ends yesterday cuz gone for 10 days. Friday, saw you walking down street and a bit surprised." This guy is a piece of work. Obviously, I ignored him. I hope he finally gets the hint that I want nothing to do with him.
waynebrady Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 He's just not that into you. Its so stupidly easy to contact people nowadays if he wanted to talk to you he would. Women certenley don't agree, if they wanted to talk to the guy... they'd wait and play games as usual. Or is it simply that women do not even want to talk to the guy? If so why does it bother you so much if the man don't text/call?
waynebrady Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Women play the "busy" game with me all the time. it's annoying so if she is taking 10 mins to respond to a text when she just sent me one I basically put my phone down & carry on with what i'm doing. I can't be bothered to stop what i'm doing every 10 mins. to play text games with a woman. But, worst case i'll get back to them next day if I wanted to talk to them. Women play the busy game and act like that with virtually all men though... meh, what can ya do about it though. Might as well roll with it and act like a desperate man who worships the woman and will do everything just to hear her voice... Thats how women like men to be, aslong as it's just an act and you don't really worship the woman(like she wants) theres no harm done.
Leeway Harris Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 I'm always ultra-surprised when I do hear back from someone. To me, fading out is normal behavior. I thought that's just how people did things nowadays. So I neither ask for, nor do I offer any excuses for not responding to texts or phonecalls. I wasn't aware they were needed.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 I'm always ultra-surprised when I do hear back from someone. To me, fading out is normal behavior. I thought that's just how people did things nowadays. So I neither ask for, nor do I offer any excuses for not responding to texts or phonecalls. I wasn't aware they were needed. Fading out is common in " dating' but it doesn't mean it should be tolerated. An I like the way you think. No action is the perfect action in response to a flake.
harmfulsweetz Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 It's normally I've been busy or something. I figure...if you're too busy to send a text saying you're busy, or whatever, perhaps they're not available for a relationship. Relationships take time and effort, and if someone hasn't those/or can't be bothered to make time to send a simple text, then they don't have time for an R. I have a tendency to forget to text people immediately back, I normally get back to them at some point, but I know if it were someone I was truly bothered about, I'd text them immediately. If it is someone I'm so/so about I'll leave it til later. I'm not saying the time frame in which a person gets back to you is an indicator of interest, often it is, a person that takes longer, (of course there could be valid reason for it) often isn't all that excited about you. That's just how I am I guess, and just my opinion.
jane100 Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Thing is, why ask? Why bother to listen to "reasons, excuses, whatever"? If people call, they call. If they don't they don't. Why waste a second of your life considering it further?
sjpdc Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 ok, here is my take on the whole thing, ive had some experience with this, as someone said before, it is so very easy to get back to someone, everyone has cellphones and texting has become the almost default form of communication, i have never given much beleif to excuses for not returning a call or a text, ive heard them all, such as my battery was dead, a real winner is when they say they were charging their phone.. a phone does work when charging, or saying i was in a valley and had bad service. people do have things going on and cant always get back to someone fast, people work, they sometimes have kids to attend to, family issues and what not, some people are just nortorious for being slow to respond, i have found that when you are used to someone being quite fast at responding and that always responds within a certain amount of time it is when that changes you need to wonder.. i found out that a girl i was seeing when she would say that her phone was dead it really meant she was with another guy, and another gal said she went to bed early.. fact was she was with another guy, (she may not have been lying about the going to bed early, haha). basically through experiences i have found that a persons phone etiquite says ALOT about a person, listen to your gut instict about things.. if a guy/girl you are interested in or currently seeing suddenly changes his/her phone etiquite and throws out excuses i strongly suggest taking a step back, make them come to you, if they are into you they will call, but be strong, dont give in to the temptation to call/text them if they havent responded to the last one. if you must try again at least wait a couple days, dont make it look like youre sitting on the phone waiting
tami-chan Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 " to engage you at that time would have been the worse thing I could have done" :rolleyes:!
Ay Diesel T Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 This one girl was ghost for like days on end, told me she was busy. Managed to set up a date then she flaked right before, said she was tired, and said to get a rain check. I laughed, then put a capital B next to her name in my phone for "bitch". I don't contact her anymore.
jane100 Posted February 27, 2011 Posted February 27, 2011 I'm always ultra-surprised when I do hear back from someone. To me, fading out is normal behavior. I thought that's just how people did things nowadays. So I neither ask for, nor do I offer any excuses for not responding to texts or phonecalls. I wasn't aware they were needed. I missed this one earlier. It is my view entirely, its so common, not just at the very beginning, even when things seem to be getting somewhere. Mind you, I think it used to happen in the past too - e.g. a man would just stop calling you on your landline. But I think people tended to have more confrontations in the past about it nonetheless. I feel a certain "ennui" about it now when things suddenly go quiet / dead. I am not sure the reason.
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