Josh17 Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 I have finally done it. I have successfully pushed my wife right out of my life. Now my gaming time is limitless. . . WHAT HAVE I DONE i have pushed her away for 3 years now and ignored her to play an online video game. Now she wants a separation and says she doesnt love me like she used to. Can anyone even blame her? no. My son.. another casuality of my gaming addiction. A future that includes a broken home is almost a sure thing for him. Why couldnt i have given up that stupid game before it ruined my family and life. How do i show her how sorry i am and how much i love her? She says she wants a separation to give her a chance to miss me again. I cant help but feel that my life is over.
gator12 Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 Don't even think about her right now. Your first step right now is dealing with your problem. Fix that first, in whatever way you can; then you can move on to saving your relationship with your wife. Right now throw away the game, cancel all subscriptions. If you don't have the strength to do it then get someone else too. You have a problem and it is time to tackle it. Your wife will never want you back until you've changed and the only way is to tackle this problem head on. Choose now, your life or a game -Gator
Author Josh17 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Posted February 15, 2011 I quit the game about a week ago, i put the acct up for sale. this changed nothing. She wanted me to leave but i really had nowhere to go at that time so i ended up staying for another few days. Nothing got better. She made it clear that she was still upset with me and said i was trying to act like nothing happened. Today i decided i should leave and give her the time she asked for. She seemed relieved. We do have a son together and this is getting very complicated. What should i do? Do u think she is done with me? Its valentines day and she wouldnt wear her wedding ring even the heart necklace i bought her. Im just sick with this mess ive made for myself and my family...
Author Josh17 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Posted February 15, 2011 Can anyone give me some ideas on how to show her she is still the love of my life and how to rekindle our love we used to share for one another? i havent been able to sleep or eat right since this happened a week ago and i feel like the longer this goes on the farther she slips away form me =(((
Hlep Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 You definitely need to address the addiction. You should seek out a support group or a psychologist if your video game addiction is that bad. You really need to do that for your wife and kid man. I think admitting you have a problem, and that your responsible is a good first step you've taken. Now you have to do something about it. I suggest doing a google search on it, reading up, and actively searching out help.
Author Josh17 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Posted February 15, 2011 The thing is, after it was put out on the table like that,(my gaming addiction) I quit w/o hesitation. i have no urge to play. i hate the game now and wouldnt play it if u paid me. all i want is my family back and another chance at our marraige =(
Author Josh17 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Posted February 15, 2011 (edited) Its valentines day and she doesnt want anything to do with me =( i feel so lost and just want her to say things will get better between us! Is there anything i can do besides quit the game and never play or never ever allow myself to ignore my wife like i have again(if im even given the chance)??? Edited February 15, 2011 by Josh17
milkmaterial Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 (edited) its just a video game, at least ur at home and not out looking at scantily clad women in a lingerie bar. imo, let her get into your game. ALSo stop being a complete noob and play like 4-6 hrs 3x a week, not 10 hrs 5 days of a week. u have a life, get some exercise, go out with your wife, plan some trips. dont let other pixels dictate to you what time u should get on and what time to get off. its your life, your wife and kid = reality. u quit about a week ago hmm. that is similar to= u quit about 1 day ago. dont fool urself. shes probably afraid ur going back to the old style as soon as she accepts u. Edited February 15, 2011 by milkmaterial
marqueemoon4 Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 (edited) I made the same mistake... I played online video games ALOT and chose it over spending time with my wife and son. I basically withdrew from her because I could never get my basic needs from her. I've completely stopped playing games since things got ugly in August, but its too late, D is on its way. I'm curious Josh.. what game were/are you addicted to? WoW? Edited February 15, 2011 by marqueemoon4
depplover_1980 Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 It's early days Josh, you need not panic yet... You will need to prove that you are tackling your previous addiction head on, even speak to a support group - you need to explore why you were so into the gaming. There was something missing in your life for you to have become addicted and you need to explore this with a counsellor. Stop over simplifying it, with 'it was only a game, i've stopped now etc' as this will irritate your wife. This was obviously a huge problem and shut down the communication between you so you will have to prove you've quit long term. Give her space for now whilst working on yourself, then keep softly approaching her to talk with you. All is definately not lost at this stage but you need to fully appreciate the impact your behaviour has made.
Author Josh17 Posted February 15, 2011 Author Posted February 15, 2011 The game I was addicted to was world of warcraft. Thank you very much for your feedback. I moved out and am staying at a friends for awhile. I left today. Last night she said that even though we r separated I am still her best friend. Is that a pre-friend card she is pulling? Or reassurance that things might still be ok?
JasonRules Posted February 15, 2011 Posted February 15, 2011 I never can understand how men in the US can become addicted to video games, whereas in Europe that's never really the case. Anyway, you need to quit cold turkey and seek counseling. You obviously have an obsessive compulsive personality. As for your wife, if she loves you and sees you have healed yourself then she might want to give it another shot, but right now you should just let her go. Marriage is like a flower. If you don't water it, nurture it, feed it, give it sunlight it will wither away and die.
depplover_1980 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Hi Jas, Gaming addiction exists here in the UK too! A couple of years ago here in Nottingham a guy was stabbed to death by an enemy on WoW from Germany - the man tracked him down, travelled across cos he'd beat him online!! Crazy.
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 Wow that's scary, Depplover! Had never heard of anything like that. Video game addiction is like any other addiction. I watched a tv series on a group that specializes in curing these addictions, but I don't know how common it is. However, you have to go to therapy. Just throwing the game out won't do it. You'll still crave the addiction.
milkmaterial Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 (edited) gaming addiction is prevalent everywhere (not just in the US), imo, blizzard games are the most addicting. ive heard girlfriends tell me their husbands play it too much, and that it is a "marriage killer". (this is from europe) yeah i suggest u write ur wife a long letter, telling her that u have realized your mistakes and would love a second chance with her to prove your worth. its not as if u slept w/ 10 women sheesh. just hope u didnt promise her before that you would quit, and you still came back. imo, ive quit smoking but it was hard to quit the game. Edited February 16, 2011 by milkmaterial
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