yellowhibiscus Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 So....I've been seeing this guy for about a month and a half. We both agreed to take it slow and not rush into things because we both just got out of a relationship and didn't want to have a rebound. Things have been going pretty well and I decided to have the "talk" with him about how much I liked him and that I wasn't interested in seeing anyone else. He told me he wasn't interested in seeing anyone else, that I'm an amazing girl, and that he isn't going anywhere. HOWEVER, my friend texts me tonight saying that she saw him HOLDING HANDS with his ex girlfriend. I send him a text asking him if things are really over and he says yes...I told him that he was seen holding hands with her. He told me that yes, they went out to eat as friends but they were not holding hands. He says it is not what I am thinking at all. He then sends me a text saying that it was a bad idea anyways and that she flipped out at him there. I really started to care for this guy. We had a great night last night, we had dinner, watched a movie...thought things were wonderful. Now I don't know what to think!!!!
Lilmisus Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 So....I've been seeing this guy for about a month and a half. We both agreed to take it slow and not rush into things because we both just got out of a relationship and didn't want to have a rebound. Things have been going pretty well and I decided to have the "talk" with him about how much I liked him and that I wasn't interested in seeing anyone else. He told me he wasn't interested in seeing anyone else, that I'm an amazing girl, and that he isn't going anywhere. HOWEVER, my friend texts me tonight saying that she saw him HOLDING HANDS with his ex girlfriend. I send him a text asking him if things are really over and he says yes...I told him that he was seen holding hands with her. He told me that yes, they went out to eat as friends but they were not holding hands. He says it is not what I am thinking at all. He then sends me a text saying that it was a bad idea anyways and that she flipped out at him there. I really started to care for this guy. We had a great night last night, we had dinner, watched a movie...thought things were wonderful. Now I don't know what to think!!!! First off, you need to talk to him face to face about this. Having this sort of conversation via text is never a good idea, since he can easily lie or manipulate the story, or you could misread something he says. Although his business with his ex is his business and it's not a good idea to pry for details he isn't willing to give, you need to ask him what's going on with her. Why he was out with her, and why he didn't choose to tell you about it, you had to hear it from a friend, since you guys are working on becoming serious with one another. Ask him what's going on, and if he still has feelings for her (which, he most likely does, even if it's only slight feelings). Don't attack him in any way shape or form though, since that will only make him defensive and pull away from you. Just have an open conversation, and listen with an open ear to all he has to say. Once you get the honest answers out of him, and you know for sure what's going on, can you really know what to think. If I were in your position I would assume that my friend was telling the truth about the hand holding business, and I would question if I really wanted to be with a guy who was willing to publicly hold hands with his "ex" girlfriend.
Recommended Posts