SS21 Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 I've been having an off and on again relationship during the last three months with a young widow whose husband died a year ago. She's a beautiful girl who has a good heart and really sees a lot in me. Unfortunately, she's also pretty demanding and can be demeaning when she doesn't get her way, has had some issues controlling her drinking, and hasn't been very respectful of my time away from her. We have a lot of things in common, share a lot of the same goals in life and I really have felt sorry for what she's been through, so I just simply haven't been strong enough to resist the temptation to come back to her even though I've tried to end our romantic relationship a few times already. It's really been tough because I've tried maintaining a friendship with her when we haven't dated, since she hasn't really made very many friends since moving here (Her husband died not long after they moved here, so she's spent more time in depression here than getting out and meeting people.). Still when we get together as friends, she always wants to try things romantically again, and I usually give way. I have to admit, I've plain handled this situation horribly. Unfortunately I told her I would try dating one more time this week, which I absolutely shouldn't have done, and this weekend was just another reminder for me why I simply need to move on and end things for good (bad drinking night Friday night, another stupid argument on Saturday). Unfortunately, tomorrow's Valentine's Day. We're planning on having a movie date, but I just plain don't want to be romantic with her and lead things further on. For whatever reason, even though we had another argument Saturday, she still thinks things are good and she just sent me another text saying how much she misses me. I know if I drop another bomb about breaking up again for good . . . I just don't know. I'm just plain hurting and horribly confused. She's a nice girl who deserves a lot better than the treatment I'm giving her and has already gone through enough in her life, but this isn't a healthy relationship for me at all. Should I just go ahead and break it off today even with Valentine's tomorrow? I just hate that there's no good way to handle this at all.
gator12 Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 Breaking it off is better than leading her on. She's been through alot, but dragging this out will only hurt the both of you even more. -Gator
Author SS21 Posted February 13, 2011 Author Posted February 13, 2011 (edited) Thanks Gator. I guess the other thing that's holding me back from calling it off, since I have tried to break this off a few times already, she keeps giving me a hard time about how I've never given her a full enough of an opportunity to make things work. She keeps telling me how I keep running away at the first sign of trouble, and I do find myself questioning whether I have given this a full opportunity. And like I said too, she's got a great heart and there's a lot I find attractive about her. But stuff like I described just keeps happening seemingly every week, and I just can't stand it anymore and haven't been able to stand it for a long while. I know she probably feels insecure around me, for good reason . . . after all her husband died and I haven't been a stable relationship partner for her, which has probably led to some of our blowups, but it's gotten old. Like I said, I've handled the situation horribly. She just keeps wanting to try, and when I do decide to give it another try, I just want it to end. Edited February 13, 2011 by SS21
Recommended Posts