justletgox51 Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 So, tomorrow is my ex-boyfriend's birthday of 11 months. We see each other every once in a week (we go to school together although he's in grade 11 and I'm still in grade 10), but we pretend as if we no longer exist in each others' lives and avoid each other as much as possible. It hurts but what can I do? However, I remember when I had MSN, which was around 3 weeks ago (I uninstalled it after a week because I couldn't handle seeing him online and not initiating a conversation with me) I im-ed him and said, "Hello." Truth behold: He never replied but told my best friend that it was too early to talk or to become friends. In addition to that, he has already blocked and deleted me on Facebook, on my birthday which was 2 months ago because I started spamming my FB statuses about how he kissed me and acted like we were still a couple on my birthday. I did that because I was pissed off and hurt since he did play with my emotions for a whole week after we broke up. (If you want to know my break up story I already posted it here.) Anyway, ever since Christmas day (another story I posted here) I quickly stopped talking to him because I didn't want to chase him anymore. I gave up. SO, my question is... Should I greet him tomorrow? Mind you that I have no Facebook, MSN, I can't call anyone on my cell phone unless they are my best friends or family emergencies, and I can't text on my cellphone because my family did not provide me with a plan for it. Therefore, I can text via 'textplus' an app on itouch. But still, I'm 50/50 on this because I want to greet him via textplus or tell someone I said 'happy birthday' for him. But if I just randomly approach him in the hallways or call him on my home phone-- I just know my feelings will come rushing back, and I might even hold him up and talk about the past (it happened when I called to greet him a "Merry Christmas" since it was supposed to be our one year. Plus, I don't want to ruin his birthday with my greeting because I don't want it to end up like what happened on my birthday. I want him to have a happy birthday and I'm positive he just won't even care about whether or not I'd greet him. Any advices? And what did you guys do when your ex's had their birthdays? I would greet him via text, but I'm the type of person that would break down with the no replies, especially coming from him when he might just reply with, "thanks." HELP?!?!
raincheck Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 dont send him anything. you already said yourself, he won't care. not to mention that you'll feel horrible if he doesn't reply or replies with "thanks". you want more from him than he is willing to give-- just accept that your feelings and longings are not returned (an unpleasant fact of life) and let it go. put him out of your mind as best as you can, and try not to make all your todays about your yesterdays. focus on moving forward, not backwards
Author justletgox51 Posted February 13, 2011 Author Posted February 13, 2011 Yeah I think I won't and you're right, I really should move forward. But thank you for the advice
Username37 Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 Glad to see some younger people here (I'm a senior) Don't say anything. I greeted my ex happy birthday and she pretty much was trying to use me as an emotional tampon haha NC
Author justletgox51 Posted February 14, 2011 Author Posted February 14, 2011 Yeah, I think I won't but in my head I'd sometimes think, "Maybe it's not such a bad idea... I should just text (via textplus since I can delete the conversation and he won't be able to reply) him a "Hey, it's [my name here]. Happy birthday." But then I'd think of the things he did and he may not even care whether or not I greet him and stuff. It's just all of my friends think I should just be plain and simple to greet him. What do you mean by trying to use you as an emotional tampon? LOL, I'm so sorry! xD
Username37 Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 What do you mean by trying to use you as an emotional tampon? LOL, I'm so sorry! xD By that I mean I'll would've been totally friend zoned and she would crawl to me when she has problems. Basically, she'll use me until someone else comes along. I learned that from Loveshack back in June haha
Author justletgox51 Posted February 14, 2011 Author Posted February 14, 2011 Ohhhhhhh, I get what you mean now. How are things now between you two?
Username37 Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 Ohhhhhhh, I get what you mean now. How are things now between you two? Well. She hooked up with someone at her friends party 3 weeks after our breakup and 5 other guys over the summer. She now has a boyfriend that she's been with since September. She told me "I'm not gonna date in college. I'm gonna focus on school" We don't talk obviously. But I see her all the time and it's pretty apparent that she's trying to avoid me. Like she's afraid or something
Graceful Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 justy, It sounds like you made up your mind to dismiss the idea of contacting him, but just in case you're on the fence today, I wanted to send you some strength and tell you: DO NOT CONTACT HIM. It's just not appropriate. I know it's hard not to do something that you feel is friendly and nice, because I'm the same way. But right now, it's more important to take care of your heart, than extending yourself to someone who probably doesn't care. Just isn't worth it. Too risky. And even if he did thank you. So where does that leave you? No where you want to be!!! Take care of YOU. p.s. I got a Happy Birthday message from my ex on my birthday a while after our breakup (he broke up with me) and it meant NOTHING to me. I just thought he was operating on guilt and it actually made me feel bad.
Author justletgox51 Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 hello Well, guess what? I didn't contact him at all yesterday. I had so many chances to greet him because we passed each other a lot at school, though it was either I was with someone or he was with someone. Though, I did a terrible stupid mistake because last night (a few more hours before he is officially 17), I hacked my best friend's FB account and checked over my ex's profile. It was terrible because I kept reading the greetings he received and thinking to myself, "Wow... I could have greeted you but you deleted and blocked me on Facebook." And I also looked at his profile pictures to be left with nothing but only pictures of himself, and a picture with a grade younger than me. In addition to that, on his twitter (my friend showed me his twitter because apparently she got deleted from his bbm and panicked :S ) it said stuff about, "Should I ask her to be my Valentine?" And it just broke my heart... ugh.
Author justletgox51 Posted February 16, 2011 Author Posted February 16, 2011 @Username: awww man, seriously?! D: I have to admit, a lot of girls say that and we girls tend to break those promises... But wow, that's just... Immature and stupid on her side. Who broke up with who?
Username37 Posted February 16, 2011 Posted February 16, 2011 @Username: awww man, seriously?! D: I have to admit, a lot of girls say that and we girls tend to break those promises... But wow, that's just... Immature and stupid on her side. Who broke up with who? Yep. All of this chaos started with a cake And she dumped me. OVER THE PHONE
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