Versus Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 hey y'all. me and my ex have been dating for almost 5 months. i know it doesn't sound a lot, but we were VERY serious and intensive.. everything was going great, tho i never trusted him 100%. but i never trust any man. i used to go through his phone and facebook messages whenever he wasn't around.. just to make sure he wasn't cheating or flirting with others. however, after 3 months i found out he lied to me about his age. he was older than what he claimed he was. i got very mad, and left him. then we got back after 3 weeks of separation. more than a month after we got back together, we went on a romantic vacation overseas. it was perfect! then, at some point, he was very obsessed with his phone. so i went through his msgs again (obviously he didn't see that) - and saw that he was flirting with some other chick more than a month! she used to send him pictures of her (which he deleted), he told her they were "sexy" (!!!), and she even came over to his house when i was overseas! i couldn't take it - and had a fight with him @ hotel room. i told him that he was a lier, and that i shouldve dumped him @ first time he had lied to me!! i felt SO stupid n betrayed.. he didn't say much.. obv he denied the whole thing, said it looked bad - but it wasn't as bad as it might look. asked for forgiveness, but i couldn't stand him and his voice! we got back to our country, i took all of my stuff from his place and left. he texted me 2 days after saying "who the hell are you to go through my msgs?! you're not my wife!". suddenly he changed his attitude.. he became the one who was allegedly "betrayed". then he started saying **** that i wasn't faithful too! WTF?! i couldn't stand what he was doing so i called him 2 hours later. he didn't answer, and texted me that "i'm very mad.. i think we should take some days off from each other". so, i've waited for his phone call.. NOTHING! 4 days after - i just packed all of his stuff in a bag (including the gifts he had bought me) - and put it in his lobby. still - no contact from his side. called him almost 3 weeks later - NO ANSWER AGAIN! WEIRD THINGS THAT HAPPENED SINCE THEN: 1) our first "meeting" happened just one week after (1 month after the breakup)! he was in a club with his friends and girls. my friends told me he was there, so i dressed up and showed up. he saw me - and left the club 10 minutes after i arrived!!! of course i ignored him and didn't say anything to him! 2) on my birthday (2 months after the breakup) he suddenly showed up with his friend in MY FAVORITE PLACE (he never comes there.. and he knows that's my place)! we arrived together.. ignoring again. i came with like 30 friends. i was the center of the attention. his friend followed me to the toilets and try to have a small talk. i was nice to him, but not too much. 3) 1 week after, some weird guy shows up on my facebook, trying to hit on me.. apparently he works @ same building with my ex. he starts talking to me, and when we get to my ex, he's like "oh! i know him.. i've just hooked him up with that SUPER hot, intelligent, cute chick! it's been going amazing between them!!". and i've never even asked about it! and then, he stopped talking to me. 4) ex starts to go out to my clubs like every week! i don't get to see me, cause God plans it like this but my girls tell me they see him sitting on the bar with a bitter face, bored, with some random chicks he won't even talk to. 5) the last one! hahah.. my best friend sees him in a restaurant (i know he hates that friend of mine). anyhow, he started talking to her and was very friendly! asks her "how was it in France with Versus (me)?". she was like "amazing.. how do you know about it?!" so he said he saw pictures somewhere on facebook. then he told her "i see Versus a lot lately.. you know. i'd be glad if that would happen less..". ?!?!?! SO, i don't know if i choose to look at all these as signals.. cause if he really loves me and cares for me - how come he isn't contact me at all!? do you think he's interested in me, or is it all coincidence??? it's been 4 moths since the breakup.. i miss him. we shared love and emotions. i was his first love since a long time.. thank you!
Eddie Edirol Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 He doesnt contact you because he knows better. He doesnt want to be back with you. He doesnt care for you and certainly never loved you. His actions make that obvious. He cheated on you because he wasnt that into you in the first place, and was still flirting with some other women while he was with you. You need to do what you know you should do, which is stop worrying about what he's doing, and you dont return to someone who cheated on you, especially within 5 months of dating. Youre in the clubs all the time, go find someone new. You are choosing to look at those things as signals, theyre not, youre searching for reasons to get back with him so you can stop missing him, but you know you shouldnt even be thinking about getting back with him. If you want him back, you have to make the move, he wont do it. He doesnt have to. But know this, he cheated on you before because you werent all that to him, he will cheat on you again. So unles you enjoy drama, stay away.
carhill Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 Accept that this relationship is over and take some time to be alone and rebuild your trust in *yourself* so you can be with a trustworthy man in the future, 100%. Good luck
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