Girl left me, for another guy, guy doesnt want her, came running back. WHAT DO I DO?

[popoy]

Hi, just to make things clear, i posted this link a few days back, and since then, everything flipped, greatly.

It made another kind of issue, thus me making another thread, hope it is ok for girls here.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t264549/

 

so after the incident in the above link, this happened :

 

 

alright, it turns out, the guy she's inlove with, likes someone else. not her.

 

So after knowing that, and after dumping me, and after sending me those real goodbye emails, and after saying that despite all I've done, she just can't fall in love with me, or she just wants us to be friends,,,

 

she called me, i answered, and she was there on the other line, crying so hard, saying her 'sorry', saying she regret her decision so much, and she will not be able to find someone else like me. and asking for another chance.

 

that call was so emotional. I was just blank, I didn't say much. I was just saying like, "so that's it, you're just gonna ask me back. it's that easy for you.."

 

she was just crying..

 

then, still, i didn't contact her, well because, i still feel mad.

 

now it's valentines day, and she sent me a text message, asking for a dinner date, and saying she'll be waiting for me whether i'll come or not. and if I don't come, then that's it for her, she'll conclude that i don't want her anymore, and she'll not bother me ever.

 

Now, i need some advice guys, will i go?

What do i have to do? what do i have to say?

-Because it's kind'a irritating that she's the one giving "ultimatums", like, if you don't come, i'll be gone forever. that's just sh*t.

-and i don't want her to think anymore that one call from her, and i'll come running right back to her again, because that's how i've been before to her. always coming back despite her pushing me away.

-and of course, i still like her much. i just want to change the way she treats me like someone she could throw away, and pick up again if nobody else is paying attention to her.

[mo mo]

run. run away. run fast and run hard.

 

Not only is she trying to get sympathy from you, she's actually PRESSURING you. You are thinking that this is your last chance if you want to be with her on V-day, but you have to remember that she's the one that messed up.

 

Sounds like she's either manipulating you or an emotional mess (probably a bit of both)

 

run run run run run run run run run run run run run

[january2011]

I second mo mo. She left you for another guy and only came back because he didn't want her.

 

If you get back together, in my experience, it's unlikely that you'll ever feel secure about the relationship and that she won't leave you again when someone else catches her eye.

 

You're in a position of power. She's trying to hard-sell you into believing that her limited-time offer is sincere and worth a lot more than it really is. Ignore the glitzy brochure and walk away.

[Grinning Maniac]

Ignore her. She's not really dedicated to you. If she was, she wouldn't have left you for another guy. Do you really want to be someone's back up option?

 

Let her sit at that table alone.

[Ay Diesel T]

Properly tell her you're not interested, and that she should lose your number.

[mo mo]

Properly tell her you're not interested, and that she should lose your number.

 

Yea, you should definitely be mature about it. Hopefully that will teach her something.

[somedude81]

Eh, since I've been a bit bitter about women recently I'll suggest something that nobody else said.

 

Make her beg. Use her up.

 

Just be ready to cut her off at a moments notice.

[Eddie Edirol]

Keep ignoring her. She SAYS she will give you an ultimatum, but she will keep calling. Or maybe she really wont, but if she doesnt, she doesnt want you that badly, and she just wants a safety net so she wont be by herself. Let her be by herself and feel the burn of failure. But you still dont want her back, she'll just dump you for the next guy. She wasnt sure that the guy she really wanted was into her, and she jumped the gun by dumping you, she will do it again. Whatever made her lose her attraction to you will still be there, if you know what it is, dont take her back.

 

But heres what you do, use the power you have now to heal yourself. It should make you feel better that shes grovelling now, feel better with it before she gives up.

[daphne]

She's a douchebag. A manipulative one at that. I personally wouldn't do a thing. She needs a wakeup call on her behavior. I find the best way to do that is not to tell someone off but just to walk away quietly.

 

If she had sincerely felt like she had made a mistake (which she doesn't, trust me) she would have thought it through before contacting you. She wouldn't be desperately trying to get you back. She's doing that so she can save face with teh other guy. Nothing do do with you really, other than she needs an ego stroking.

 

And as for dinner tonight, that was incredibly manipulative. She's like a used car salesman that's trying to sell you a lemon by suggesting teh take back. It won't be available after 9pm tonight. Well, it's still a lemon. Do you care how long it's available?

 

I gotta think this girl is really young to be pulling this nonsense. Whether you really like her or not, you have to have some integrity and realize that she treated you poorly before and is continuing to do so. It's not worth getting someone back who would. If you take her back under these conditions, you are in essence giving her the green light to continue. If so, good luck. You'll need it.

[phineas]

She knows what she did & knows what she is doing.

Ignoring her shows her you know it also.

 

Make sure you are not home on V-day. go out with some friends.

You know, in case she stops by.

 

She doesn't get V-day special treatment from you for acting badly.

 

Like everyone says, she will just do it again.

You weren't good enough for her & now that nobody wants her you are?

 

.

[Jazzari]

Everyone else pretty much said it all. But I'll add my 2 cents as well: Ditch this girl. She just wants you to make her feel better until the next guy rolls around that she wants.

 

The mature route would be to text her back with the short "no thanks" message and let her know its over. Just don't get dragged into a dialog with her about it. Say its over, then cut her off.

 

Of course, the mean side of me says not to say anything. Let her go to the restaurant and wait til hell freezes over. A hard smack of reality upside the head would be good for her.

[OldSkool]

I would tell her that I respect myself too much to ever be someone's second choice.

[iJester]

Use her for sex while you look for someone else. Just keep your distance emotionally.

[Woggle]

Tell her she had her chance and she doesn't get another one. The minute the other guy wants her she will dump you in a heartbeat.

[milkmaterial]

i would go if its a free dinner and after that tell her u fell in love w/ someone else. order a lot too..desserts galore.