popoy Posted February 10, 2011 Posted February 10, 2011 Hi i'm a guy and I kind'a need to know how women think about my situation. Okay, here's the case, I have this girl and we've known each other for years. I kind of, courting her to be my girlfriend, but in the same setting, we're in a "mutual understanding" stage. Basically, we like each other, without the commitment. She even calls me happiness (in her facebook posts,lol), and i'm pretty sure she likes me a lot. Her co-workers notice the special kind of glow she have, which again im sure, because of me. (confident huh? ) So, everything is so good between us, but she's just waiting for the right moment to make me her bf. (That's her thing.) We're sweet and everything. I could feel that maybe she's inlove with me. Everything's fine between us. BUT, she has this biggest crush on an officemate. and we've been honest to each other about everything. She even told me that she's really interested about her officemate and she feels butterflies in her stomach when talking to him. Sucks for me, but it's no big deal to me. I told her to carry on. I wouldn't mind. Because that's how confident I am in what we have. (Of course, i have a strong basis on this confidence i'm feeling. I could really tell she likes me a lot because I know her) We've been very fine for a month or more. THEN, all of a sudden, she texted me, saying, "I'm sorry, there's something wrong with me. I'm sorry. really i'm sorry. But Ive fallen for someone else." etc. She fell inlove with the guy! and she's asking me to meet her to explain her feelings. i didn't reply yet. It's like yesterday, we're so into each other, then the next, she fell in love with someone else, what the F is that???? Could somebody explain this to me please? and do i have to meet her? I don't think it'll change what's happening right now.
Jazzari Posted February 10, 2011 Posted February 10, 2011 Girls who are in love don't wait for the right moment to make a committment. Nor do they talk to you about other men. I think she loved you as a friend. But that's all. Sorry. You don't have to meet her if you don't want. Entirely up to you. She's going to want to remain friends so you need to decide how you want to handle that.
Author popoy Posted February 10, 2011 Author Posted February 10, 2011 Girls who are in love don't wait for the right moment to make a committment. Nor do they talk to you about other men. I think she loved you as a friend. But that's all. Sorry. You don't have to meet her if you don't want. Entirely up to you. She's going to want to remain friends so you need to decide how you want to handle that. Thanks jazzari. yeah, before she wants us to be friends only. but i told her, we were never friends. because that's the truth in our reality. it's either we have something or we don't talk to each other at all. that's it. right now, she gave it a shot for us to be a couple, thus my courtship. and oh yeah, she's a family person, big time family person. she wants first to introduce a guy to her family, get her family's response, and decides whether she'll be committing to that guy. and she tends to be infatuated at most of the times. maybe this is one of those times.
Author popoy Posted February 13, 2011 Author Posted February 13, 2011 alright, it turns out, the guy she's inlove with, likes someone else. not her. So after knowing that, and after dumping me, and after sending me those real goodbye emails, and after saying that despite all I've done, she just can't fall in love with me, or she just wants us to be friends,,, she called me, i answered, and she was there on the other line, crying so hard, saying her 'sorry', saying she regret her decision so much, and she will not be able to find someone else like me. and asking for another chance. that call was so emotional. I was just blank, I didn't say much. I was just saying like, "so that's it, you're just gonna ask me back. it's that easy for you.." she was just crying.. then, still, i didn't contact her, well because, i still feel mad. now it's valentines day, and she sent me a text message, asking for a dinner date, and saying she'll be waiting for me whether i'll come or not. and if I don't come, then that's it for her, she'll conclude that i don't want her anymore, and she'll not bother me ever. Now, i need some advice guys, will i go? What do i have to do? what do i have to say? -Because it's kind'a irritating that she's the one giving "ultimatums", like, if you don't come, i'll be gone forever. that's just sh*t. -and i don't want her to think anymore that one call from her, and i'll come running right back to her again, because that's how i've been before to her. always coming back despite her pushing me away. -and of course, i still like her much. i just want to change the way she treats me like someone she could throw away, and pick up again if nobody else is paying attention to her.
spackle Posted February 13, 2011 Posted February 13, 2011 yes it's an ultimatum and she shouldn't have done it and maybe a test. I think most ultimatums come from a prove you love/want/need me attitude. Maybe she realises she's a dumbass maybe she's after attention. if you want to give it a shot tell her you're busy but you should go out another night. Then you're calling the shots.
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