hixz Posted February 9, 2011 Posted February 9, 2011 (edited) I wont bore you with all the details, I'll try to keep this brief. I was with a girl for nearly 3 months from nov - beginning of jan. it's not a hugely long time but so so so much happened between us in that time and we got so close. things happened so so damn fast, like literally, no dating, just seeing each other all the time, like every day. we got along so so well and she told me some really deep thing that had really really messed with her in the past.. (physical abuse from parents as well as so much bullying)... i was so so shocked she had trusted me to tell me all it, but we did have a ridiculously open approach with each other from the get go. over the months it was amazing, but we started to just kinda fall apart.. she really wanted a guy who was a strong figure... and that was totally me.. but when she told me all that stuff i just like sank.. i didnt ever want to do anything to hurt her, and wanted so badly for her to just be happy. she lost all attraction for me.. the reason... it was like we were just friends... i agreed with this entirely, but just wished so badly i could have done things differently so i could still be with her. that was around jan 10th, until the end of jan we didnt see each other. and i tried not to contact her because i hurt a lot and desperately wanted to move on. we've had some contact, messages and facebook. she was interested in what i was doing and shared a joke or 2. on feb 1st i was out with friends.. and guess what..i suddenly saw her there. i had been kinda flirting with another girl for the evening... i've been trying so hard to go out there and just get on with me life, and i know she had been doing the same.. from like nearly right after we broke up. my ex at the end of the night came and talked to me.. and basically.. she just said how she didnt realise she still felt that way about me. she stayed at mine, we didn't have sex.. but we did get realy inemate.. it felt so normal and seems we'd both really really missed it. that was last week.. since then I've been thrown right back to where i was on jan 10th... im all over her... i utterly utterly want a second chance. she just said she doesn't know what she wants, and i told her how hard it was for me, as i felt i was just beginnign to get over how i felt for her then that had happened... i think ive really pissed her off.. ive send her a whole load of dumb messages and told her i just need to know what she wants... I've basically let loose all of my feelings and utterly let my guard down, i must look so pathetic to her. obviously people can't 'just know'... and i feel like such a fool, it's like this was my 1 big chance and i've gone and ruined it... I feel like such a kid and so pathetic, not a guy she can actually feel attracted to. Edited February 9, 2011 by hixz
kidz81012 Posted February 9, 2011 Posted February 9, 2011 You feel like an idiot.I was married for 20 years and now my husband has cheated 3 times more fool me for staying and believing after the fist time.What a dick I was even thinking of staying as we have so much history but now he says he is confused and has feelings for her.What am i meant to stay around and wait for his decision or what.What a joke! I feel so stupid.I was also abused and **** when I was a kid and it was very hard for me to trust and we have been together since I was 17. i thoiught he was the one but I know now I was wrong.There must be someone out there for everyone.Dont beat yourself up time is short and our memorys longer.You will find someone to love youy for who you are.I promise time heals all.I hope.
depplover_1980 Posted February 9, 2011 Posted February 9, 2011 You won't be the first or the last to pour your feelings out but it will be the last time you make this error - we have all made this mistake at some point. But all is not lost, you make up the ground now by leaving her well alone and picking back up your life in a dignified manner. The only way you could spend time with her again is if she calls and apologises for mistreating you, otherwise it is a new life for you. A nervous proposition after such a speedy love affair I know, but also excitement that one day this will happen again to you but next time you'll be wiser and stronger from this experience.
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