pandagirl Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Out of curiosity, for those on OKC, what is the frequency at which you get contacted? I've heard that women get hundreds of messages a week, but I am a woman... and that is not the case for me. haha. I probably get msged about an average of twice a day.
Hules Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 I'm a guy iv'e only gotten into the online dating thing a few weeks ago. Ive been getting about one girl a day messaging me and about 50% response rate from girls I message. Though getting girls to talk off the website on skype/phone has been a bit of a challenge (I don't like talking through text prefer phone conversations or meeting in person) Been talking to one girl on skype for the last week, seem to have a lot in common going to ask her out for coffee tonight when I talk to her . Might be my first date from online dating Overall i'm pretty happy with the responses iv'e been getting considering I hear a lot of guys complaining they cant even get girls to respond to them let alone have girls messaging them.
EasyHeart Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 YIKES!!! I'm a guy, and I wrote a profile on OKC a few months ago because I was bored and I had seen OKC reference quite a bit on this forum. So I figured I'd see what it's like to write a profile. I didn't contact anyone because, frankly, I didn't find very many attractive women (except one, who was really gorgeous -- and an ex-girlfriend! ). But I've gotten about two dozen messages from women, some of which were lame, but most of which were just plain crude and gross. Ewww! Now I'm afraid to go back to that site!
tigressA Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Counting IMs and e-mails, 3-4 times a week on average. This is with the guy sending the initial message without any prompting from me. When I am proactive and send out messages, I have around a 90% response rate.
Anxiety Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 I'm thinking about putting a profile on OKC when I'm ready. But I was wondering, how often do women message men? Is it like out in public where woman just sit around waiting for men to come to them?
Author pandagirl Posted February 6, 2011 Author Posted February 6, 2011 YIKES!!! I'm a guy, and I wrote a profile on OKC a few months ago because I was bored and I had seen OKC reference quite a bit on this forum. So I figured I'd see what it's like to write a profile. I didn't contact anyone because, frankly, I didn't find very many attractive women (except one, who was really gorgeous -- and an ex-girlfriend! ). But I've gotten about two dozen messages from women, some of which were lame, but most of which were just plain crude and gross. Ewww! Now I'm afraid to go back to that site! Maybe you live in a small town? I live in a big city, and there are a lot of attractive men and women on OKC from what I see.
Author pandagirl Posted February 6, 2011 Author Posted February 6, 2011 I'm thinking about putting a profile on OKC when I'm ready. But I was wondering, how often do women message men? Is it like out in public where woman just sit around waiting for men to come to them? I message men if only both their profile and picture is extremely appealing to me.
somedude81 Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 I put a profile up on OKC about a year ago and I've gotten zero messages. I live in a pretty big city (not LA)
Crazy Magnet Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 My profile says I'm in a relationship and I average about 4 new msgs per day so that's like 28 per week I guess. I'm not sure if people don't read or what. I even have a blurb in the looking for thing that says something about only looking for friends b/c I'm in an R. Peace talks (lol) with my BF have resumed so I guess I'll give it some time and see how things go.
EasyHeart Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Maybe you live in a small town? I live in a big city, and there are a lot of attractive men and women on OKC from what I see.Nope, I'm in the city. I think we're the 15th largest metro area or thereabouts.
Author pandagirl Posted February 6, 2011 Author Posted February 6, 2011 My profile says I'm in a relationship and I average about 4 new msgs per day so that's like 28 per week I guess. I'm not sure if people don't read or what. I even have a blurb in the looking for thing that says something about only looking for friends b/c I'm in an R. Peace talks (lol) with my BF have resumed so I guess I'll give it some time and see how things go. Wow, you must be smokin' hot! haha. Also, there are probably a lot of people on these sites who are looking to cheat, which is why people don't pay attention to your relationship status. Nope, I'm in the city. I think we're the 15th largest metro area or thereabouts. Hmm... maybe you just live in an area with unattractive people? haha.
Leeway Harris Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 I am a man who lives in a big city, and I just have to say that I find OkCupid utterly mystifying. First of all, a disproportionate number of the women on that site are lawyers, executives, or at least educators with Master's degrees. Even in New York, how is this possible? There have to be women here with normal, boring jobs that "only" have HS diplomas or Bachelor's degrees! Is every last one of them already married? Second of all, I am totally invisible on that site. And I truly don't know why. It's EXTREMELY rare that I get a first contact from a woman, and when I do, if I respond, she immediately disappears. The women I initiate contact with almost never write back, and I really don't think I'm aiming out of my league here. For example, if she's more educated than me, or if she looks like a model, I tend to not bother with a message, because I figure she gets millions of them and I can't make myself heard above the noise. Even so, it's like I don't exist. I would love for someone to tell me what's going on here, because unless I have seriously overestimated my own attractiveness (and I don't think I have) I can't begin to guess why I can't get any attention on OkCupid.
EasyHeart Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Hmm... maybe you just live in an area with unattractive people? haha.Could be! I'm not complaining, mind you. I'm just making an observation. I meet plenty of attractive women in real life; I just wasn't impressed with what I saw at OKC. (I like of some of the articles on OKC, though) My profile says I'm in a relationship and I average about 4 new msgs per day so that's like 28 per week I guess. I'm not sure if people don't read or what. I even have a blurb in the looking for thing that says something about only looking for friends b/c I'm in an R. Well, in fairness, you are kind of a crazy magnet. . . .
ivalm Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Out of curiosity, for those on OKC, what is the frequency at which you get contacted? I've heard that women get hundreds of messages a week, but I am a woman... and that is not the case for me. haha. I probably get msged about an average of twice a day. So in December I had OKC up for 3 weeks and I got 2 first messages for (extremely) unattractive girls. I also used to average perhaps 2-3 views per day and a 30% reply rate.. Now I have been up for 5 days and I got 0 first messages and of 5 messages I sent I got 0 replies.. trying to rework my profile because perhaps it is now very unattractive I don't know what's up and the OKC profile help forum is pretty unhelpful..
SmileFace Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 So in December I had OKC up for 3 weeks and I got 2 first messages for (extremely) unattractive girls. I also used to average perhaps 2-3 views per day and a 30% reply rate.. Now I have been up for 5 days and I got 0 first messages and of 5 messages I sent I got 0 replies.. trying to rework my profile because perhaps it is now very unattractive I don't know what's up and the OKC profile help forum is pretty unhelpful.. Yeah, the OKC forum is more for laughs than anything else. The only advice I got from there was ... don't wear skinny jeans and sarcasm doesn't read well online ..lol When I first started OKC .. I was averaging around 3-5 messages a week. This is after being on for more than two weeks. Since the first two weeks I was recieving 5-6 a day. Only because I was a new face. After being on the site for a while - having talked to most of the guys in my area at least once my contact rate seemed to fall big time but I do have a good turn around rate when I do actually message guys.Be aware I disabled my OKC account in November. So who knows how it is now.
mo mo Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Yeah, the OKC forum is more for laughs than anything else. The only advice I got from there was ... don't wear skinny jeans and sarcasm doesn't read well online ..lol When I first started OKC .. I was averaging around 3-5 messages a week. This is after being on for more than two weeks. Since the first two weeks I was recieving 5-6 a day. Only because I was a new face. After being on the site for a while - having talked to most of the guys in my area at least once my contact rate seemed to fall big time but I do have a good turn around rate when I do actually message guys.Be aware I disabled my OKC account in November. So who knows how it is now. Dude, you should be meeting new guys all the time. Doesn't Gotham City have a people factory? Between the Joker, Two-Face, the Red Hood, Bane, Zasz, and Batman's other villains, they have killed millions of people, yet the city remains densely populated. There has to be a people factory in there.
SmileFace Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Dude, you should be meeting new guys all the time. Doesn't Gotham City have a people factory? Between the Joker, Two-Face, the Red Hood, Bane, Zasz, and Batman's other villains, they have killed millions of people, yet the city remains densely populated. There has to be a people factory in there. Yeah but they are all background people. Just fullers. They don't say much ... lol
Nexus One Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 There has to be a people factory in there. It's called women. *hides*
Star Gazer Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 When I was on OKC, I received about 7 messages per day.
SmileFace Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 It's called women. *hides* Well technically...lol
Crazy Magnet Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 I did a little "statistical analysis" of my own. I get about 4 msgs per day but I get around 30 views a day. So apparently only 4 of the 30 can't read. But that's still MANY more views than messages. I also get a lot of people adding me to their favorites but I don't know how that works so I'm not sure what good that does them.
Leeway Harris Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 I also get a lot of people adding me to their favorites but I don't know how that works so I'm not sure what good that does them. That's probably people who are a little shy about writing, but want to get your attention somehow, thinking maybe you'll favorite them back, or be so impressed with their profile you'll just have to message them first. But they didn't read your profile carefully enough to see that you're in a relationship, so of course it does them no good at all.
deebeechrisyo Posted February 6, 2011 Posted February 6, 2011 Dude, you should be meeting new guys all the time. Doesn't Gotham City have a people factory? Between the Joker, Two-Face, the Red Hood, Bane, Zasz, and Batman's other villains, they have killed millions of people, yet the city remains densely populated. There has to be a people factory in there. I believe Bane is one of the major villains in the next Batman movie, coming out in 2012. I didn't realize that he was such a major character in the comics. They portrayed him as a dumb brute in Batman and Robin (not sure why I'm even referencing this atrocity), but in the comics he rivaled Bruce Wayne's intellect and played the major rival in one of the biggest arcs of that series. And yes I totally went off on a tangent on this thread!
TryingToMoveOn Posted February 7, 2011 Posted February 7, 2011 As a guy who's had a profile on the site for over a year ... I get unsolicited messages maybe 1x/month.
Macaw Posted February 7, 2011 Posted February 7, 2011 I'm a guy there and being not so lucky as well, but then again I did it more for the learning experience than put any serious amount of work into it. I'll be honest and say that I click on just about any girl profile that seems remotely interesting and pops up on the match search (about 20 or so profiles every time I visit) so it doesn't come as a surprise when I hear women saying they get 30 visitors a day.
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