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thoughts on this? okay behavior or not?


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Posted

So i went out tonight. A friend of mine came in from out of town. My gf and her friend are already downtown. Me and my friend go downtown and we all meet up. My gf's friend leaves early because she is drunk. My gf and my friend had also been drinking i wasn't however. So on the way back my gf is in the front seat and my friend is in the back. So my gf kisses me good night on the lips. Then she gets out and then my friend gets out to sit in the front seat. Before he sits in the front seat him and me gf say it was nice meeting you and such and then my gf kisses him on the lips too? is this normal? I thought maybe a peck on the check was normal, if that? Before today my gf never meet my friend..

 

thoughts please..not sure what to make of this

 

btw my gf's friend if also a girl is that makes any difference

Posted

It's not normal. Kisses on lips are for partners.

  • Author
Posted (edited)
It's not normal. Kisses on lips are for partners.

 

i forgot to mention that it wasn't a make out session or anything

 

so what am i supposed to do now... :-/

Edited by somuchforthat
  • Author
Posted

i geuss i am just trying to figure out what she was thinking. I mean i was right there and saw the whole thing so i don't think she was trying to cheat or anything? If she were try to cheat then i don't think she would do it front of me? What should i do?

Posted

i dont get the sense it has anything to do with cheating. next time you talk maybe just tell her you think that was weird and ask her whats up. see what she says.

Posted

Probably drunk by the sound of it! I'd mention it, but not make a big deal out of it.

  • Author
Posted

thanks for the advice. But now i am wondering i mean she goes out quite often without me and i don't have a problem with that. Its usually with her girlfriends but if she acts like this when she is drunk around me im not sure what to think when im not around. Im not that close with her girlfriends ( these are her friends since she was little) so i dont think they would really tell me anything if anywhere were to happen. I hate having to think these train of thoughts! So far up until this incident i have always trusted her 100%. This incidient has be a bit uneasy...and im trying to gauge if i should be feeling this way or not. I will ask her whats going on.

 

thanks all

  • Author
Posted

Spoke with her. She said there was no kissing and just a hug. Now my mind is confused as heck. I didn't see a hug as far as I remember ...Now my mind be adding new information that didn't actually happen... Sigh! She said that it would e ridiculous and she isn't like that and is shocked that I. Would think that way. I don't remember seeing a hug...I'm pretty sure I saw what I saw. But now my mind is doubting itself :- /

Posted

haha (her), dont doubt what you saw. you seemed to describe the entire scene really well. so i doubt your mind is playing tricks. maybe just let it go and keep it in the back of your mind/// if weird stuff keeps happening than you'll know its something else.

Posted

Well , ask your friend.

Posted
So i went out tonight. A friend of mine came in from out of town. My gf and her friend are already downtown. Me and my friend go downtown and we all meet up. My gf's friend leaves early because she is drunk. My gf and my friend had also been drinking i wasn't however. So on the way back my gf is in the front seat and my friend is in the back. So my gf kisses me good night on the lips. Then she gets out and then my friend gets out to sit in the front seat. Before he sits in the front seat him and me gf say it was nice meeting you and such and then my gf kisses him on the lips too? is this normal? I thought maybe a peck on the check was normal, if that? Before today my gf never meet my friend..

 

thoughts please..not sure what to make of this

 

btw my gf's friend if also a girl is that makes any difference

 

It is not normal in U.S. society. That doesn't mean it isn't everywhere, though I'm not familiar with anywhere that non-family members and non-partners would kiss on the lips. Seems weird to me.

Posted
Spoke with her. She said there was no kissing and just a hug. Now my mind is confused as heck. I didn't see a hug as far as I remember ...Now my mind be adding new information that didn't actually happen... Sigh! She said that it would e ridiculous and she isn't like that and is shocked that I. Would think that way. I don't remember seeing a hug...I'm pretty sure I saw what I saw. But now my mind is doubting itself :- /

 

 

Can't remember which movie it was but I think when Groucho Marx got caught with the wrong partner, he responds with an indignant "Who are you going to believe? Me? Or your eyes?"

Posted
Spoke with her. She said there was no kissing and just a hug. Now my mind is confused as heck. I didn't see a hug as far as I remember ...Now my mind be adding new information that didn't actually happen... Sigh! She said that it would e ridiculous and she isn't like that and is shocked that I. Would think that way. I don't remember seeing a hug...I'm pretty sure I saw what I saw. But now my mind is doubting itself :- /

 

I see it as a huge red flag.

 

Usually the only people that bring up the "I'm shocked you'd think of me that way" line are the serial liars. Honest people are more concerned with what could they have done that would cause you to see or think that and would be willing to talk more about it, sort things out, rather than ending the subject abruptly like that (you obviously didn't bring it up again for fear of offending her, right?).

Posted
Spoke with her. She said there was no kissing and just a hug. Now my mind is confused as heck. I didn't see a hug as far as I remember ...Now my mind be adding new information that didn't actually happen... Sigh! She said that it would e ridiculous and she isn't like that and is shocked that I. Would think that way. I don't remember seeing a hug...I'm pretty sure I saw what I saw. But now my mind is doubting itself :- /

 

Double check it with the friend she kissed. He might remember it.

  • Author
Posted

Friendidnt remember Anthing. Had a huge

Hangover and woke up at 2:30pm

  • Author
Posted
I see it as a huge red flag.

 

Usually the only people that bring up the "I'm shocked you'd think of me that way" line are the serial liars. Honest people are more concerned with what could they have done that would cause you to see or think that and would be willing to talk more about it, sort things out, rather than ending the subject abruptly like that (you obviously didn't bring it up again for fear of offending her, right?).

 

She has always said we can always discuss things. The line of communication had always been open. We talked about it a little bit and she keeps asking if I am okay. I have not bought it up again

  • Author
Posted
She has always said we can always discuss things. The line of communication had always been open. We talked about it a little bit and she keeps asking if I am okay. I have not bought it up again

 

She said that it didn't made any sense for her to kiss my friend infront of me( which it doesn't) she said she would never do anything like that to me.

 

I'm not sure maybe I'm

Blowing things out of proprtion. We have had a great time with each other and she has never given reason to doubt her

Posted

Didn't you say she was drunk? Obviously, it could have been a mistake on her part, and you're taking this out of proportion.

  • Author
Posted
Didn't you say she was drunk? Obviously, it could have been a mistake on her part, and you're taking this out of proportion.

 

yea pretty sure she was drunk. We meet up yesterday to talk about. I told her to cut down the drinking she said she would. Things have been great and i believe there were no harmful intentions at that night. I asked if she remembers clearly what happened she said she remember about eight percent or so. So know whos but its in the past now.

 

thanks again all.

Posted
Probably drunk by the sound of it! I'd mention it, but not make a big deal out of it.

 

Agreed, I'd give her a pass - she sounds fun. But at the same if this behavior were to continue, ie.e., drinking, kissing, etc. You and she should have a talk.

Posted

I'd put my foot down on it now, then give her a pass. Let her know that if she's going to be engaging in minute - who knows how far she'll go, physical interactions with other men while she's drunk, that it's curtains baby! (Say it with the New Yorker accent to).

 

Also something to consider, she told you it was a hug but you saw with your own eyes a kiss on the lips. Wasn't she smashed as well?

 

Tread lightly.

  • Author
Posted (edited)
I'd put my foot down on it now, then give her a pass. Let her know that if she's going to be engaging in minute - who knows how far she'll go, physical interactions with other men while she's drunk, that it's curtains baby! (Say it with the New Yorker accent to).

 

Also something to consider, she told you it was a hug but you saw with your own eyes a kiss on the lips. Wasn't she smashed as well?

 

Tread lightly.

 

 

Yes she was drunk . She said it was just a hug and she said she would have remembered for sure if she kissed another guy on the lips no natter how drunk she is. I don't ever recall seeing a hug..though they were both standing outside my car by the front passenger door and I was seated looking through the open door. It was night time. I gave her the benefit of the doubt. I am still having a hard time about it because I don't think my mind would have imagined something like this happening. But at the same time why would she do it in front of me.

 

When i asked her about in person she sounded like she wasn't sure if she kissed on the lips (she didn't say this but you could tell by the way she was speaking) and then she said she would have remembered if there was a kiss on the lips. Then she said it was a hug and that if there was a kiss it was on the check. She made it seem like my friend initiated these interactions. She also mentioned that she was shocked that i would that she would do anything like this. Then i felt like a ass so i said sorry...

 

Im pretty sure there was no harmful intentions with what happened. But i have taken the advice of the forums.

 

 

Thanks all!

Edited by somuchforthat
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