paddington bear Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 Wrote on here about a ONS I had with a guy I got on great with. And the advice after the last email contact from him, from everyone on here, was to not reply that I was being given the brush off (which I suspected and expected myself despite having thought there was a definite clicking going on). However, the not replying niggled at me. I re-read that email and depending on what mood I was in, could interpret it as being friendly and polite, or being distant and go away-ish. My gut feeling was always that he was not some kind of player and I still maintain that. In a mood of genuinely not expecting or hoping for a reply I answered the email about 2 weeks later (and amazingly, did not check my inbox every minute of the day). And lo and behold he replied. I nearly fell over in shock. Since then, every couple of days or so he IMs me. Asks a question, or we talk nonsense for a bit - very short, not lengthy. He is abroad right now, so no chance of seeing him. Neither of us have mentioned that we slept together, or seeing each other again or anything like that. At the risk of sounding like a teenager, my question is this why the IMs? Friendly, keeping in touch with someone nice he met? He liked me too and is keeping in touch for some future point when we may meet again? Or keeping in touch with the hope of no strings attached sex again at some point? Just curious what you guys think. Am trying not to read too much into this. I'm just grateful that he has been in contact of some sort after the ONS. It stopped that horrible bitter feeling of being used, and berating myself for sleeping with someone immediately. However, I don't want to start making up some major meaning from the brief but regular contact when perhaps he's just a polite and friendly guy...Any insight gratefully received.
zengirl Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 I wouldn't consider it "meaningful" perse, but you never know where things will go. Try not to be 1000 paces ahead of yourself is all. When does he come back? If it were me, when he was back, I'd ask him out for a drink or something point-blank. Of course, the sex makes it difficult. I don't know how to navigate that, really, but go for what you want, go with the flow, and see how he responds. The worst he can do is say he's not interested and assuming he's not interested essentially boils down to the same thing. You never know what will grow and what won't.
Eddie Edirol Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 Its obvious that he doesnt want anything substantial with you, so why would you keep contacting him in the first place? Maybe he's bored and needs someone to talk to, but if he wanted anything with you, you'd know it. The ambiguous IM's are just a waste of your time. Stop talking to him, nothing will come out of this. Where are your woman instincts to tell you to walk away from this?
Author paddington bear Posted February 5, 2011 Author Posted February 5, 2011 Its obvious that he doesnt want anything substantial with you, so why would you keep contacting him in the first place? Maybe he's bored and needs someone to talk to, but if he wanted anything with you, you'd know it. The ambiguous IM's are just a waste of your time. Stop talking to him, nothing will come out of this. Where are your woman instincts to tell you to walk away from this? hahahaha they malfunctioned *edit. I replied to an email. It is he who has kept contacting me...
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