xomotoxgirlxo Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 I have been with my boyfriend for over a year and a half now. All he likes to do is watch TV every moment he gets. He claims it's relaxing and that is who he is. It's been this way for a while, but now it just seems to be getting worse, specially since he just started working graveyard shift. I don't watch much TV myself, I would rather spend down time on the internet....if I was by myself. I have been trying to encourage going on bike rides, going on walks, etc. but he never wants to. Oh, and he is pretty stingy with his money and that seems to be getting worse as well. Example, he complained about a $15 bill when we went out to dinner the other night. Should I even both to try and "change" his habit or is this just a lost cause? What do couples do that doesn't take a whole lot of money?
Els Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 How was he like when you first started dating? Is he under any severe financial stress, also?
somedude81 Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 Graveyard is killer, hence the name... He's probably very tired.
cerridwen Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 Hmmm...is he stressed by his job? Or by another situation? Sometimes, people with demanding jobs like to escape into TV. I agree with somedude, he could also just be tired. A change to graveyard might have reeked havoc with his energy patterns. Will this be a permanent work schedule? If it's temporary, I would suggest being patient and understanding. In terms of the money, maybe he's just being crabby. His late nights could be making him more moody. Or, are you working? Pulling your weight so to speak? Maybe he's being stingy out of some sense of resentment if you're not working?
Eeyore79 Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 I once had a boyfriend like this. I dumped him for someone more fun and sociable. Nuff said
Ross PK Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 If he was like this when you met, then you shouldn't be trying to change him. It was your own fault for going for him knowing that this is what he does.
Author xomotoxgirlxo Posted February 5, 2011 Author Posted February 5, 2011 He has always been a TV watcher. I understand graveyard shift is intense and I don't even think I could do it, but with watching TV there is like no interaction! He gets completely sucked in and won't notice anything. He even turns it on immediately after our "alone time." His job will be a permanent job for as long as his contract holds out which I think is 3 years. I lost my job about 6 months ago where for a while I was making double an hour more than him. I actually started my new job today and me not working did cause a lot of issues and he was frustrated. My boyfriend is a fun person and very sociable. We use to do things a lot more than we do now and I just don't know what to do.
cerridwen Posted February 5, 2011 Posted February 5, 2011 He has always been a TV watcher. I understand graveyard shift is intense and I don't even think I could do it, but with watching TV there is like no interaction! He gets completely sucked in and won't notice anything. He even turns it on immediately after our "alone time." His job will be a permanent job for as long as his contract holds out which I think is 3 years. I lost my job about 6 months ago where for a while I was making double an hour more than him. I actually started my new job today and me not working did cause a lot of issues and he was frustrated. My boyfriend is a fun person and very sociable. We use to do things a lot more than we do now and I just don't know what to do. OP, it sounds like this is simply how he wants to spend his time. You may be growing apart in terms of your interests. It's not unheard of. If you're feeling it's a deal breaker, tell him. See if he's motivated to be more active. But! compromise as well and give him TV time too. Don't want to compromise? Want someone more like you? Be prepared to move on.
Recommended Posts