My biggest fear about NC...

[babybear]

...is that in another few weeks or months I will still feel exactly the same as I do right now.

 

We had limited contact since December...so that helped ease me into NC a bit (I initiated it).

 

Anyone have any very positive experiences with this?

 

Thanks.

[january2011]

I had to go LC with an LTR ex due to financial and business ties. Though at the back of my mind, I've more or less accepted that one day we will go NC permanently.

 

With regard to your situation, you don't know how you will feel in a few weeks or months. It's most likely the uncertainty that's making you fearful, rather than the prediction that you will feel the same way as you do now.

 

It's worth remembering that NC is for your benefit and not his. Going NC means 'no new hurts'. Every single time you hear from him or hear about him, it opens up the wound and it's like picking the scab over and over again. Takes longer to heal and eventually you'll be left with a scar.

 

At the beginning of NC, the wound is still fresh so it hurts more, but with time, when you take care of the wound, it starts to look better and better. Eventually, you won't even notice that it's there.

[depplover_1980]

Good advice January. I am going through a tough day today, my mind is strong but the sickness is something I can do nothing about.

[babybear]

Depplover, hang in there. I know all too well about the good and bad days. Yesterday was an awful one, but today I've felt great. I'm really seeing why everyone always encourages NC...no new surprises to ruin your day when you start really moving on. When I'm having those sick days, I leave the house ASAP and do anything else but sit home...so hopefully you have some ways to keep distracted.

 

January, great advice! 'No new hurts.' I love that. That's why I broke up with him to begin with...he was empty words and promises, with little to show for it. Now I expect nothing, and there's no pit in my stomach at the end of the night.