weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 We haven't been out on a date since moving in. He spends every night playing on his xbox with friends online. I tried talking to him about things and said I don't want things to go stale and for us to make an effort - he said he would. I do all the cleaning and most of the cooking. I belong to a socialising network who have arranged a night at the theatre tomorrow. He said last week he was interested, I asked if he wanted me to get him a ticket. It's frowned upon for non-members to attend but I managed to get him one. He knew this and now tonight said that he'd never originally said he wanted to come, I just went ahead and booked it, and that he can't sit in the seats because it will mess his back up (he has a back problem at the mo). I'm upset and angry. He could've said no or told me last week so I could get someone else to come. I'm so fed up of being in a relationship where all of a sudden it feels like he's making out I'm trying to do everything with him. I was annoyed and I'm sure he noticed - I said it wasn't really on he didn't tell me sooner but now I'll try and find someone to come with me. Am I reading into things too much and gettting angry over nothing????
edgeofdarkness Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 rellay time u balied out of this ralestioship. All u do is complin n mk all the effrt. u need 2 cut yr losses n get out.
edgeofdarkness Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t262460/ http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=262146&page=2
utterer of lies Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 I was annoyed and I'm sure he noticed - I said it wasn't really on he didn't tell me sooner but now I'll try and find someone to come with me. Am I reading into things too much and gettting angry over nothing???? He stopped making an effort and takes everything for granted. Get him to make an effort or break up.
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Fair enough point, and what I've been thinking. I guess I'm trying to clarify whether I've been being clingy and whether it's pushing him away and making him act like this.
utterer of lies Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 rellay time u balied out of this ralestioship. All u do is complin n mk all the effrt. u need 2 cut yr losses n get out. Are you trolling or is this really the way you communicate in writing?
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 He stopped making an effort and takes everything for granted. Get him to make an effort or break up. Please advise on how I can get him to make an effort?
utterer of lies Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Fair enough point, and what I've been thinking. I guess I'm trying to clarify whether I've been being clingy and whether it's pushing him away and making him act like this. You don't make him act like this at all. 'Look what you made me do' is a children's game...
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Well I know you can't make somebody make an effort, but you said in your post 'get him to make an effort' so I wondered what you meant by that?
utterer of lies Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Please advise on how I can get him to make an effort? Tell him you are fed up and if things don't change, you will break up with him. Of course only do this if you are really willing to go through. Either he wakes up or you know you are not important enough anymore.
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Tell him you are fed up and if things don't change, you will break up with him. Of course only do this if you are really willing to go through. Either he wakes up or you know you are not important enough anymore. Is it normal not to make an effort after some point in a relationship?
Seamless74 Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 moving in... playing house.... bad idea young lady. We all have to learn this the hard way. I would say your gonna be in for a long ride. Id start apartment shopping soon.
utterer of lies Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Is it normal not to make an effort after some point in a relationship? Of course. He tries to optimize his quality of life, you do the same. As long as he thinks you are his for sure, it's easy for him to increase his comfort on your costs....
edgeofdarkness Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 is it normal not to make an effort after some point in a relationship? jeesus christ women, wak up!!!!! Its never gonta get better thsn this!!!!
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 dout it shes too stuc in a rutt.... hes alredy awak shes the one sleeping, becus she doesnt relize shesnot importent 2 him. she needs hr eyes oppepned If he's treating me this way does it show he has fallen out of love with me?
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Of course. He tries to optimize his quality of life, you do the same. As long as he thinks you are his for sure, it's easy for him to increase his comfort on your costs.... So do I have to keep playing little games or pulling away periodically to show him I may not be his for sure?
utterer of lies Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 If he's treating me this way does it show he has fallen out of love with me? Maybe. It just shows where his priorities lie (xbox/easy life on your behalf).
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Beginin 2 thnk u r a trolll Then please don't reply to my posts. I am confused and unhappy, and trying to figure things out without just walking away and then wondering if I did the right thing or not.
edgeofdarkness Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Why dont u chheck yr othr threds to see how ded-end this is? Hes a loser but yr a doormatt. at a subway staton
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Maybe. It just shows where his priorities lie (xbox/easy life on your behalf). Historically, when I start not being so available he becomes more available and wanting to do nice things. BUT I can't live my life like that. I want him to love me all the time and want to do nice things for me.
edgeofdarkness Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Then please don't reply to my posts. I am confused and unhappy, and trying to figure things out without just walking away and then wondering if I did the right thing or not. u think staying lik this is RIGHT!?
denise_xo Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Based on your other threads, I'd be out of there if I were you. But if you want to make a last ditch attempt, identify the key issues where you want him to change, tell him you need to see improvements in those areas by some kind of set timeline, and make it clear to him that otherwise you're out. What uol said, basically.
Author weeble78 Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Why dont u chheck yr othr threds to see how ded-end this is? Hes a loser but yr a doormatt. at a subway staton Like I said, if you can't be helpful then please go post on some other threads. I don't need to be called a doormat by people I am asking for opinions and advice from.
utterer of lies Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Historically, when I start not being so available he becomes more available and wanting to do nice things. BUT I can't live my life like that. I want him to love me all the time and want to do nice things for me. Well, go find someone else, then. Doesn't look like it's possible with him
Recommended Posts