Timbo22 Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Well lets just say things with my g/f were literally almost to good to be true...I am 22, and she is almost 21 now, things started out with a bang and we did everything together...she came from a rough family and i took all her pain and stress away, she was also very smart and she says that I was her backbone and got her into one of the best schools in the natiom...We had trust, I always made her laugh all the time i cant stress this enough how i could put a smile on her face...There was also times were i took our relationship for granted it was so strong...She stressed a big family one day, she always talked about the future and she always sang to me...She goes to church, volunteers her time to the poor. She also made me depend on her, she said once she gets her big time job shes going to take care of me for everything that i have done for her, she wanted me to be a stay at home dad, she stressed that alot...Im a full-time student too, i plan to be a x-ray tech. Her 1st year of college was great, it went perfect. I saw her every weekend and times were great..we lived a hour away by now but nothing could hold us back...nothing changed we were madly in love. Now this is were it starts to take its turn..She's a biology major and shes always studying and studying now into the 2nd year, when she sees me and whenever i talk thats all shes doing, plus she has a job...I have no problem with it though cus things between us are perfect...They seemed perfect up until last friday...Boom she says she needs time shes overwhelmed with school...I tell her that we are strong and the real you wouldnt want this your not yourself...I felt like a was fighting a battle i was never going to win...I pleaded and pleaded...she needed time..I left went to a friends, called her the next night asking if i could see her and get my stuff...she answered and said yes...I put my best look on...I couldnt handle life without her..As soon as i saw her i reminded her of all the good times, i begged and begged she kissed me so real and wouldnt let go...then she cried and took off running back inside...Its hasnt been a week yet and i cant get through the a second not thinkin about her...she was my best friend...I wrote flooded her text and facebook with the things that she loved so much about us, nothing worked...She would just tell me to stop...Felt like the door was shut...she said maybe down the road we might be back but that could be years and years she said...I asked her to me honest with me and shes the most honest person in the world...She told me and i told her to put it on god, if she loved me and she said no...This is not her, u have to understand...shes so stressed with school and her grades that i know im shooting myself in the foot...she completely blinded sided me by this and i never saw it coming...last week she was at the end of my bed singing to me love songs...boom next gone were done...I couldnt look at her anymore so i just deleted her off my facebook, my phone, everything it doesnt help...Idk what to do? Is there any hope for us? Im still in shock, I cant stress u enough how much she told me she needed me, depended on me and loved me.
Truane71 Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 I know it may seem near-impossible but give her SPACE. She said she was feeling overwhelmed so the worst thing you can do to your chances of getting her back is to add on top of that. Flooding her with texts and calls is the last thing you want to do! Take some time away from her, don't talk to her unless she initiates it. Work on yourself and whatever is going on in your life right now. If she wants to come back it has to come from her! you cannot convince someone to be with you, and even if you can, it will not last. It sounds like you two had a good relationships so just give her some time and space. Maybe she'll come back, maybe she won't, but at least this gives you a shot and you won't push her away.
seaworld Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 hey man.. i know what you are feeling. I went through something similar, she blindsided me after talking to a friend and realized she wasn't happy. The thing is, i did everything you did, begged, wrote emails, even flew back twice to talk to her. None of that works, and it only prolongs her to keep you away from her. At this point, the only chance you have is to go absolutely NC with her, and let her reflect on her past relationship with you, let her miss you. I know you think ignoring her will only let her get away, but i guarantee you, she WILL think about you, she WILL reflect on the relationship. Any chance of her coming back has to be entirely from her, with no outside influences, and the only way you can do that is to leave her alone. I was like you, I made the mistake, i prolonged my ex gf time for her to hit that "reflection" period, and I may have lost her forever because of it. Because, not soon after we broke up, there was a guy that pursued her 6 wks after, during that time I was also pursuing her, but ironically pushing her even farther. Now her and that guy are "dating" and 3.5 months into the breakup, she may now be into that "reflection" period, but it may be too late for me as that guy complicates things. Don't let this happen to you. Go NC and increase your chances.
Author Timbo22 Posted February 3, 2011 Author Posted February 3, 2011 Thanks for the input guys, I feel a little better...I called her again to explain things and i told her i deserved it. Im accepting that we have to be friends so ill just leave it at that. She added me back on facebook and our pics are still there. When your in the state I am I would like to think there is hope even though she has "No Feelings for me anymore" I also told her I was going out with my friends again and feel better and I hope we can be friends...Probably shouldnt of done that, I almost feel like I might have blew it. I still love her to death and want her to be happy so i said that. Im going to start no contact now, Im not going to text facebook or anything...I cant help to think that it cant help that all her friends are single. She just had her father co sign a apartment with 4 of her friends for next semester. Her dad never wanted her to have a boyfriend...ever regardless if it was me. He pays for her college, and she plans on attending med school. I cant help to think that he had a talk with her idk...thanks guys
IfiKnewThen Posted February 3, 2011 Posted February 3, 2011 i think it would more likely be the jealous friends. sometimes girls seem to be your friends and maybe are...but they get jealous too a lot when young and you have a b/f that "takes time away from them" . she could have had reservations and wanted to be free...but their confirming it could have taken it over the top. at this point it looks like the only real things you can do..is go N/C and wait any maybe she will come around. and while in N/C..start to accept you may only get as far as friends someday. i know she was your B/F..i know that that is like. and that is very painful to lose. you want to share everything with them. use this time now to try to reconcile with the fact that she may not return and build yourself up and know you are still young (i know you might hate to hear this) but you have a great chance of meeting someone else someone and loving fully again.
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