Heartbrokenforever Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Our 2 year relationship was great. We fell in love right away. We went on a vacation together within the first couple of months that we were dating. There was never any jealousy and we both had our own lives aside from each other. We would have our fights n he would shut down. Communication seemed to be our issue. We broke up last February for 2 weeks where i followed the no contact rule and he came right back. The problem is that he apoogized but we never spoke about our issues. Throughout our relationship, i became very close with his family and e became very close to mine. I was in his sisters wedding in July, my whole family was invited. We went on their honeymoon with them in August. I'm Sept, I went back to school and began taking my stress out on him. We were fighting a lot over little things. I come to realize I picked on him a lot toward the end. The last argument we had stemmed in us nt speaking for four days due to a little white lie he told and he ended it. He said he couldn't handle the pressure of being in a relationship and was unsure if he ever wanted to get married. I assumed he was panicking because at his sisters wedding everyone was asking when we were going to get married. I was obviously upset but tried to hide my emotions. The month of October was all over the place. I made a lot of mistakes. We had tickets to a Jet game with friends and I still went with him. My best friend got married in October and I asked him several times if he would still go with me. I didn't call him to much..dint get me wrong. I never begged or anything of that nature. The jet game was October 31 and it went well. We we're flirty n he was buying me things but I realize now i shouldn't ave gone at all. The next weekend I met a guy and went on some dates with him. It kept my mind off Shun for the whole month. No contact at all. The beginning of December I ran into him. He was very nice and seemed really happy to see me. We talked for like 5 minutes and we wished eAchother well. That weekend I went out and bumped into him again and we ended up hooking up. While at his house he asked if i was going to tell the guy i was seeing if that i was at his house. I told him it wasn't like that (the new guy and I had only kissed). He told me that he was glad I went out with someone so he wouldn't hAve to feel guilty if he hooked up with someone else, i took this as him being jealous becaue he also said i must not have loved him if was able to move on so quickly. I obviousy at that point told him how much i loved n missed him...bad!!! The next day he told me he didn't want to give the wrong idea. He said that he still cared about me and was attracted to me but he still wanted to be alone, A couple of weeks later, he texted me to let me know he got s new job. I congratulated him and wished him luck. I bumped into him a again on xmas eve and we talked for an hour. I was reading his body language and he seemed to be into the conversation. Christmas day he texted me merry Xmas. On New Years Day, i was feeling like he might be mising me as much as i was missing hi. I had written a paper on loss and wrote it on how it felt to loose someone you love. It was really touching and heart felt and a few people told me i should send it to him. I did so and he was extremely flattered. He said he really missed me but s still unsure if he wanted to get married and he couldnt ask me to wait. He said he wasnt saying never but he didnt want to hold me back. He then proceed to put the lyrics to Whitney houstons i will always love you on his facebook status. I figured i did all i could and i had to back off now, he knew how i fekt and only time woud tell. Two days after this convo, The week that he was suppose to start his new job, he called me to ask me a silly question that i thought was an excuse to call me. This is where it got messy.. The day after the phone call I ran into him (we go to the same gym and no smatter what time i go he's there, i try to avoid him.. This is where all of our run ins happen). he told me that the police academy he was suppose to start the following day had gotten postponed and he couldn't get his job back. After telling my dad, he said he could hire him as a temp so I called to tell him n he said he could find a job on his own. He apologized and told me that he appreciated it and to thank my dad for him but he wanted to see if he could get unemployment first. The following week it snowed and my car got stu k in the gym parking lot. As i was waiting fr my brother to cime help me dig it out, my ex pulled into the lot and told me he would help me dig it out. We had fun, flirting and pushing eachother in the snow. That weekend i was in the city and going home on a 253am train. I was in the train station by myself when suddenly i see y ex walk in with two girls, one of which his best friend is in love with and the other another mutual friend. He kissed me on the cheek and walked away. I was confused as we were on good terms and had agreed to be friends as he said he didn't want me to not be in his life ( another no no). Being drunk, i went over o stand with them as i was alone and it was late. He proceeded to treat me like a fool and ask me if i was following him. He told me i was looking at him like a weirdo and asked me to not follow him. OH GOSH HOW RUDE. I got on the train a lone and was so confused. I finally realized that he was probably dating one of those girls. We have a lot of mutual friends (my best friend is dating his best friend.that's how we met). I called my best friend to see if she knew what was up and she said that she heard the night before that he had hooked up with one of these girls on nye and was talking to her. Out of rage and confusion, I called his mom ( I know I know, poor choice we talk a lot still). And asked her if she knew, while talking, she realized that he had lied to her about where he was going and she was annoyed. She knew nothing about this girl though. I proceeded to text him and tell him that he needed to get out of my life immediately and i never wanted to hear from hin again. He told me that i needed to stop talking to his mother, im assuming she told him bc she was made for the way he treated me and the how he lied. The next day i felt bad and apologized. He told me that he was sorry and shouldn't treat me that way but everything was getting to confusing. He said he wasn't dating her, but im not sure. I heard from my best friend that they aren't dating but I'm not sure i believe it. He went from being nice and chatty with me to not speaking with me at all. I saw him at the gym today and he completely ignored me. I am seeing a life coach and he said that i should delete all of our pics off facebook and send him all of his stuff in the mail ( still have a house key) with a note that wwas almost identical to your the note you have on your site. I did so and i think he received the package today. I have made a lot of mistakes this past month. Ever time he gave me an inch I would take a mile instead of making him work. He is now doing whatever hes doing with that other girl and i don't know if this is salvageable. Just looking for some advice on what to do next. Is this a rebound relationship?
Hhhh Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 your problem is you never went NC, your probably going to feel like crap for another year or so... were i am NC 4 months straight out of my break up and i feel like 90% just miss that part of my life
january2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 Leave him be. Block and delete all contacts. Ignore all his attempts to contact you. Go NC again. Not to get him back, but to take the time to clear your head and get out of the fog that you're in at the moment. Right now, you're hanging onto his breadcrumbs and with each breadcrumb, your emotions and thoughts are likely to spiral out of control. You deserve to be with someone who wants to be in a relationship with you, not someone who is in a relationship with someone else no matter whether that relationship is a rebound or not.
LifeIsGreat Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 I don't think logging into LS and seeing your LS name (Hearbrokenforever) is going to help you move on. How about a new LS name of "HeartbrokenrightnowbutI'llbefinebeforeIknowit"?
marqueemoon4 Posted February 2, 2011 Posted February 2, 2011 I'm at 6mos and I'm still struggling.. being NC'd really sucks.
Recommended Posts