ivalm Posted February 1, 2011 Posted February 1, 2011 So, I did do 3 weeks of OKC about three months ago but wasn't serious about it and didn't get much results (a couple of REALLLY long conversations from girls who flaked when it came to personal/meeting) .. but now that I'm single again I want to give it another try.. here is my profile: http://www.okcupid.com/profile/ivalm I wiped my answered questions since some of them were done jokingly and I guess I want to be more serious this time around (I'll redo them when I have more time). Anyways, what are your thoughts? What can be done better? Any turn offs? Is my age range too much out of OKC mainstream? Of course, I'm still not waiting much from online but I do want to do it properly BTW, the profile text is from 3 months ago..
GivenUp0083 Posted February 1, 2011 Posted February 1, 2011 (edited) So, I did do 3 weeks of OKC about three months ago but wasn't serious about it and didn't get much results (a couple of REALLLY long conversations from girls who flaked when it came to personal/meeting) .. but now that I'm single again I want to give it another try.. here is my profile: http://www.okcupid.com/profile/ivalm I wiped my answered questions since some of them were done jokingly and I guess I want to be more serious this time around (I'll redo them when I have more time). Anyways, what are your thoughts? What can be done better? Any turn offs? Is my age range too much out of OKC mainstream? Of course, I'm still not waiting much from online but I do want to do it properly BTW, the profile text is from 3 months ago.. I can't read it here at work but I do have some advice from using OKC... First off: 3 weeks is not very long. It took me a year and a half to find the wonderful woman I'm with now. It's going to take time. Don't get discouraged just after a month or two and then say "well it just didn't work for me". As for the profile, general rules of thumb I like to advise are 1. Stay positive and 2. try to describe unique things about yourself. As you browse more profiles you're bound to run into the bitter women who've been dating too long and take on a negative attitude. You'll notice them because they change the "message me if" section into "DON'T message me if". Keep your profile positive. You want to come across as a happy person, who is secure about who they are, and has a lot to offer a girl. Describe yourself accordingly. I think people also overlook mentioning specifically what they offer in a relationship. So many people get caught up with "what I want" but try talking about what you want in addition to what you can bring to the table in a relationship. Also, it's easy to read other profiles and end up sounding just like everyone else. There's also the people who make their profiles really whacky thinking they're making their stand at uniqueness. You need to find middle ground. Try to sound more "real" in your profile, sound more genuine. Avoid catch-phrases like "I live life to the fullest" and "I'm up for anything" or "I like to go out but stay in as well". Talk specifically about what you like to do, what are you hobbies, your interests, something that sets you apart from all the other guys on there. These are the things that will allow people to connect with you and identify about you. If they know some specific things about you then maybe they can relate and help conversation go easier. That's the best pre-viewing advice I can give at this point. I reiterate though, this can take a long time to find someone who is perfect for you, don't get discouraged after a string of bad dates. It's ok to take a break every so often and then come back when you're ready again. Best of luck. Edited February 1, 2011 by GivenUp0083
depplover_1980 Posted February 1, 2011 Posted February 1, 2011 Keep it all really simple but with content. I switch off if a guys profile is too long, it bores me. I want to know what he's into showing he has a life and what he is looking for ideally. To be honest I have to fancy him too so you can have the greatest profile but if I don't find you attractive I won't reply.
Author ivalm Posted February 1, 2011 Author Posted February 1, 2011 Thank you guys for the general advice, but anything specific to my profile? Again, with a lot of appreciation
GivenUp0083 Posted February 1, 2011 Posted February 1, 2011 I also personally think puting up average photos of yourself is a good idea, not flashy or pics that make you look really really good. This way you can avoid wasting time with women that only go out with you because they think your pictures are attractive. What will happen is they will meet you, and even though you aren't unattractive, they would have built up expecations and when you don't meet them you're out. I'd rather have a girl respond to me because she likes what she read in my email and profile.
Author ivalm Posted February 1, 2011 Author Posted February 1, 2011 I also personally think puting up average photos of yourself is a good idea, not flashy or pics that make you look really really good. This way you can avoid wasting time with women that only go out with you because they think your pictures are attractive. What will happen is they will meet you, and even though you aren't unattractive, they would have built up expecations and when you don't meet them you're out. I'd rather have a girl respond to me because she likes what she read in my email and profile. I agree, which is why the pictures of me that are up are non-flashy, I actually look very much like in the photos
Author ivalm Posted February 2, 2011 Author Posted February 2, 2011 Ok, so by the fact that I have random male and female viewers from Australia, Sweden and other remote (from where I live) places look at my profile when I posted in this thread, I'm guessing a few of the LSers looked at my profile, but still I got no particular replies.. is there really nothing to say? Am I uber-bland? Does my profile look non-serious/repulsive/whatever? Do I appear ugly/average/cute/etc in my photos? Thank you for your time If you feel uncomfortable posting here for some reason, can you perhaps PM me your comments?
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