outsider1 Posted January 31, 2011 Posted January 31, 2011 Iam in bits, me and my fiance are going on a break (his choice not mine) our relationship has been strained lately!and calling it a rough patch would be an understatment. despite all we are very much in love and very close. altho he has some issuses as do i. his being hes secretive and mine being trust issuses. (deep down i do trust him tho i just some times i have doubts like when he point blankly wont let me use his laptop like as if he has somthing to hide) apart from our issues we r good together,everything a relationship should be. Well anyway today we had a huge row over him not letting me borrow his laptop (just so i may add it has nothing to do with me breaking it or him watching porn. i know he watches porn so hes not going to hide that) and over my trust issues. i said some things i didnt mean he stormed off and i didnt here from him, like an idiot i went down his house chasing him begging pleading all the usual stuff. anyway he said he wanted a break and i said about his uncles funeral friday and me going etc. so we agreed that we need space this week. and if i dont here of him by thursday night with weather he wants me at the funeral or not its because its over. he said he still loves me etc but hes just had enough atm. i dont want to grovel to him so should i do nc and just wait for him to contact me. im usually the needy cant live without him type. and tbh iam a mess atm. help me xxxx
depplover_1980 Posted January 31, 2011 Posted January 31, 2011 You just admitted you are a 'needy can't live without him type'. Now look at the type of women men are attracted to and independant with their own interests is pretty much a requirement from all modern men. Therefore you need to sort your life out and stop being so pathetic; it won't be easy at first but you can train yourself to be strong. Believe me I have done this with time. I look back at my earliest relationships and I am not even a similar person now, I relied upon my partner for happiness and wanted to do everything with him. In my next relationship with my then fiancee I was a little better and started to find hobbies and me time, infact started to even enjoy hanging in a different room sometimes. Then when that ended 18 months ago I went single and really started to learn to be by myself, make myself happy and fill my time. I have been in shorter relationships since where I've kept who I am completely and give to them bit by bit. Rediscover what you like, what did you enjoy as a child? Realise that it is unfair to emotionally expect another person to make you happy all the time. Call him less often when you are apart and go out more and stop being obsessed with his laptop and save for your own!!
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