How do you deal with it when there's suddenly no contact?

[whichwayisup]

He said it would be OK for me to call him if anything similar happened another time and I was concerned, or if I needed him in an emergency, which made me feel reassured.

 

On his cell phone or home phone? Sure you can call, but it doesn't mean he's going to come rushing to your side, especially in the middle of the night if you're sick or a crisis happens. Honestly, I wouldn't rely on him for that sort of thing. I'm sure you have good friends, family, neighbours who you can call too. The less you rely on him, the better YOU will be.

 

Silken is right, if you are freaking out after not hearing from him (1-2 days) then this rollercoaster ride you're on IS going to kill your heart and change who you are.

[pureinheart]

OK you are way more understanding than I am. It takes 2 seconds to text someone and say in hosptial with relative will call when I can.

 

Just remember its not just about what he wants. Its about what you want too. If he cant meet your needs then you have to decide whether its worth it to stay in it. If not, you walk. If being in it makes you happier than not being in it, then you consider his terms.

 

But it is what it is. I held xMM to the same standards I would any other boyfriend but for the fact that I made a point of not intruding on the times I knew he was at home with his family (essentially most weekends).

 

It has to work for you. If it doesnt then there is no point. And no if you want more then you will not be happy with this long term.

 

Yep...JJ's right, it's actually more about you than him...great post JJ:)

[pureinheart]

Just- I have to say after reading OWomans post I totally agree...my R with then MM (now DM)-

 

He called me constantly, and made sure we saw each other a lot. He was very attentive. I am not a demanding person, had he not contacted me I would not have cared, we just would not have been very close.

 

I'm kind of a free spirit and enjoy my space, I desire commitment and togetherness, although not too much. He was a very good companion.

 

Know who you are...stand up for what you want...and no less (((((((((((hugs))))))))))