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Seriously!? She's looking for someone making $100,000 -$150,000 on Match.com.

mustangsb27

By mustangsb27
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Nexus One Established Member

Nexus One

Posted
Posted
Once I e-mailed a girl to see if I had a shot. She sent me a financial statement questionnaire and said that she wouldn't talk to me until I filled it out. Some have different values than others, that's all.

 

[ME]Shakes his head.[/ME] Some people.

sb129 Established Member

sb129

Posted
Posted
Actually, in big cities, you might be amazed at how little emphasis a lot of women actually place on a man's income. I have talked to male professionals who really believe that there are lots of woman who would rather date a bartender than a professional making good money because they presumably think that the bartender has a "cooler" job and is "more fun."

 

Hmm. really?

 

I wouldn't date a bartender if you paid me.

Terrible hours!

Mind you, some people who earn really good money have to work long hours to make it too.

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mustangsb27 Member

mustangsb27

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Ok,Ok already. I didn't mean to get everyone's dander up about everything. The money wasn't the reason we stopped seeing each other. It was because I wasn't really into her having sex with another person while I was sleeping with her as well (duh), no matter how casual we were. Didn't like the thought of STDs etc, not to mention the visual I got when I thought about it (I REALLY liked her). I told her I couldn't see her any more under those circumstances. When someone said they saw her profile on Match.com, I checked it out to see what she was looking for compared to me. I know, I know. Male paranoia. I just thought it curious that money was a motivating factor. She never told me that and I never realized it. I mean, I really make a comfortable living considering where I live (Texas. Nobody bust my chops please.). I always paid whenever we went out. It wasn't any big deal. I know in New York and other places back East everything is more expensive and thus $100,000-150,000+ ( notice there is a "+" on the end. That means $150,000 to infinity) doesn't go as far as it does where I live. I never have had a shortage of money to spend on dates and such. Thus it kind of hurts to know that somehow I do not make enough money for her. Sorry to ramble, but I really did treat her well. Confused about what exactly she wanted. I know, move on and stop wasting time over an ingrate. Right?

Negative Nancy Established Member

Negative Nancy

Posted
Posted (edited)

As long as man are only willing to accept top -notch, hot women, women will look for wallets and bank accounts. Superficiality breeds superficiality....

 

 

Just as it is your biological imperative to look for the hottest, fittest woman :rolleyes: , it is ingrained in us to find the best provider with the highest resources (income). Sorry guys....

Edited by Negative Nancy
bac Established Member

bac

Posted
Posted
Actually, in big cities, you might be amazed at how little emphasis a lot of women actually place on a man's income. I have talked to male professionals who really believe that there are lots of woman who would rather date a bartender than a professional making good money because they presumably think that the bartender has a "cooler" job and is "more fun."

 

I do not think that it is what they really think if they are after a bartender.

IMO, if a woman has either no other choice of men to breed or she is wealthy herself, she would gladly date a man with little income. Also, the man can be a good FWBs/ONS.

LittleTiger Established Member

LittleTiger

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Would you rather be liked for your money or your beauty?

 

Please answer honestly and dont make up your own answer.

 

I know the question isn't directed at me but I did bring this up earlier so I'm going to chip in - money. Beauty is guaranteed to fade - then what? By comparison, income is relatively static, and for most employed people (especially men) it rises over the years.

 

Yes, if I had to choose, definitely money.......but, honestly, I wouldn't like to think any man was with me for either - I want to be liked/loved/appreciated for the person I am inside.

LittleTiger Established Member

LittleTiger

Posted
Posted
Thus it kind of hurts to know that somehow I do not make enough money for her. Sorry to ramble, but I really did treat her well. Confused about what exactly she wanted. I know, move on and stop wasting time over an ingrate. Right?

 

It might help you to know, as I tried to point out in my first post, she probably wasn't concerned about your level of income. The further information you've provided in your second post (about her infidelity) suggests that the reasons your relationship didn't work out were nothing to do with money. Posting a preferred salary requirement on a dating site means nothing......except that her ideal man has money. (Sorry to repeat myself, but I believe anyone who is entirely honest would have to admit they'd prefer a partner with money).

 

You clearly weren't her ideal man - but the size of your wallet wasn't the issue. Look carefully at your relationship and work out what really went wrong before you start looking for superficial reasons why you're not still together. That way, the relationship will have taught you something important and you can move on, hopefully to find Ms Right, with a better understanding of yourself.

Billy_Boy Established Member

Billy_Boy

Posted
Posted
Actually, in big cities, you might be amazed at how little emphasis a lot of women actually place on a man's income. I have talked to male professionals who really believe that there are lots of woman who would rather date a bartender than a professional making good money because they presumably think that the bartender has a "cooler" job and is "more fun."

 

Maybe a woman who is in her early 20s and def not in NYC

allina Established Member

allina

Posted
Posted

I'm really unsure of what the issue is...? Women and men usually want a partner who is successful. As many have said, 100k isn't rich, it's an average educated professional in a big city.

 

As, for bragging, the below made me chuckle a little ;)

 

I am a teacher as well. Salary requirements aren't my thing (though my BF would be in her preferred range
zengirl Established Member

zengirl

Posted
Posted
I know the question isn't directed at me but I did bring this up earlier so I'm going to chip in - money. Beauty is guaranteed to fade - then what? By comparison, income is relatively static, and for most employed people (especially men) it rises over the years.

 

I'd rather be liked for more than my money or my beauty, but if I had to pick one, I'm with you: Money. I have way more control over that than my beauty anyway. And at least it's something I earn and direct in my own life. The looks I have? Just got 'em from my Mama. ;)

Knittress Established Member

Knittress

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Posted
I'd rather be liked for more than my money or my beauty, but if I had to pick one, I'm with you: Money. I have way more control over that than my beauty anyway. And at least it's something I earn and direct in my own life. The looks I have? Just got 'em from my Mama. ;)

 

Heh. On the other hand, I'd much prefer to be admired for the non-physical aspects of my beauty. :) I think how we wear our face has as much to do with our appearance as the genes we carry.

elastica Established Member

elastica

Posted
Posted
Heh. On the other hand, I'd much prefer to be admired for the non-physical aspects of my beauty. :) I think how we wear our face has as much to do with our appearance as the genes we carry.

 

I agree. :)

I once had a BF who (although I was a student with 2 jobs = definitely not rich or anything!) was with me for money. He preferred to be unemployed, and once he realized I live in/rent my own apartment (while he was living with parents), he immediately started talking about our future, wanting to move in "in a few months". I asked him, "why don't you rent a place for yourself?" He said, "Why would I, if you have yours? And I love you!" :sick:

He also developed a habit of borrowing money and forgetting to give it back. If I said I didn't have any money he started begging and complaining. :( It was not a nice feeling to be used like that.

threebyfate Established Member

threebyfate

Posted
Posted
How seriously can you take a chick that puts in her Match.com profile that she's looking for someone making $100,000-$150,000+? This comes from a 43 year old teacher (single mom) that makes $45,000. Can she seriously expect to get a lot of responses? The reason I know her is that we used to date. I'm a teacher (and coach) as well and I make around $68,000 (I swear IRS). I hate to think that one reason (not the only reason) we stopped seeing each other was because I don't make six figures. I mean, she's pretty good looking but geez, isn't she shooting a little bit high? *sigh* You like what you like, I guess. Sorry, just venting.
If the tables were turned and it was a single father making $45K looking for a woman who makes $100 - 150K, as a woman I'd laugh in his face no matter how good-looking he was.

 

Bloody gold-diggers. Make your own money.

Yamaha Established Member

Yamaha

Posted
Posted
Bloody gold-diggers

 

Ha. So true.....:lmao:

Woggle Established Member

Woggle

Posted
Posted

Yes, if I had to choose, definitely money.......but, honestly, I wouldn't like to think any man was with me for either - I want to be liked/loved/appreciated for the person I am inside.

 

So it's okay for you to want this but men in this thread are being torn apart for wanting the same things themselves? We are not allowed to be loved for who we are.

 

As for the thread I am glad she is telling men upfront what she is about. I make good money but it is my money and a woman is not entitled to it.

LittleTiger Established Member

LittleTiger

Posted
Posted
So it's okay for you to want this but men in this thread are being torn apart for wanting the same things themselves? We are not allowed to be loved for who we are.

 

As for the thread I am glad she is telling men upfront what she is about. I make good money but it is my money and a woman is not entitled to it.

 

Woggle, I think you've misunderstood me. If you read my first post you'll see that this is exactly what I'm saying. Of course you should be loved for who you are. We should all be less concerned with either money or appearance and concentrate on what's really important - ie who we are as people. That applies to both men and women.

 

To be honest I think everybody is too sensitive about this subject. Men are driven to look for the hottest woman they can find and women are driven to look for the best providers, it's a biological thing, it's unconscious and it's not within our control. So, a woman advertises that ideally she'd like a man with a comfortable income? I really don't understand why it matters. These 'instincts' are usually cast aside when we fall in love.

 

If everyone would stop worrying about such superficial things and concentrate on finding a loving, compatible partner, income and looks would not be an issue. I have the best partner in the world. He doesn't look like a movie star and he doesn't earn a movie star's salary - so what? - he's the most wonderful man I've ever met. :)

LittleTiger Established Member

LittleTiger

Posted
Posted
So you prefer a guy saying to you,

 

"I like you because you have a lot of money."

 

Than

 

"I like you because you are very beautiful."

 

I doubt it.

 

You can doubt it all you like but I'm me and you're you and clearly we are different. If any man admitted to 'liking' me and gave a reason based on either my looks or my money, I wouldn't even give him the time of day. I'm not interested in superficial people, either as friends or partners.

 

You asked for a decision between what I consider are two evils. I stand by my choice for the reasons I've already mentioned but actually I don't 'prefer' either one. A man likes me for 'me' or he's history.

Ariadne Established Member

Ariadne

Posted
Posted
"How dare this guy say he prefers fit women?"; "How dare this woman say she prefers a partner with a high income?". I often get the impression people think that 100% of the members of the opposite sex should be available to them, at all times, with no specific preferences for anything.

 

 

Every time I read a thread about a specific person's "silly" preference (income, height, weight, breast-size), it makes me think that what's at issue isn't the person's preference, but the fact that we're confronted to the stark realities of the dating world. Face it people, it's filled with inequalities! Nobody has an obligation to give you a chance.

 

 

The issue isn't their preferences but our equally shared sense of self-protection and entitlement.

 

Personally, I think the world would be a much better place if all men were into sassy, nerdy, tall and curvy brunettes :p.

 

(*Like*)...

sb129 Established Member

sb129

Posted
Posted
If the tables were turned and it was a single father making $45K looking for a woman who makes $100 - 150K, as a woman I'd laugh in his face no matter how good-looking he was.

 

Bloody gold-diggers. Make your own money.

:laugh:

 

Love it.

Negative Nancy Established Member

Negative Nancy

Posted
Posted (edited)
Lol, I just did.

 

Anyway, Im a man. I cant stay on this thread 24 hours. I need to work so I can buy myself some woman you know. ;)

 

 

Would you rather be liked for your money or your beauty?

 

Please answer honestly and dont make up your own answer.

 

Neither.

 

I think we all wanna be loved for who we are and want our deepest core to be recognized and share our lives as partners in crime - otherwise the thread starter would not have been upset about the money-requirement to begin with and the thread would have not created such a big resonance. Luckily I have found such a man :love: . He could have done better looks-wise, I'm sure, and I could have done better money-wise, but we are comfortable around each other and can be ourselves and have fun together and share the good as well as the bad times :love: :love: My looks will fade and already do as I approach 30, and money can be lost or become worthless due to inflation, but even if that happened we could still spend the whole time together and not be bored or annoyed cos what we have is more sustainable. :love: :love: :love: It is a nice side flattery to be complimented for looks, but it's not the core substance because it won't last. Everybody has different requirements, though, so if you want the hottest woman, you gotta accept that you most likely will be chosen by shalllow criteria as well.

Edited by Negative Nancy
jenifer1972 Established Member

jenifer1972

Posted
Posted

My guess is this is just one of numerous buttons of standard questions that she clicked after about 15 seconds of thought to create her profile.. I am sure we have spend waay more time on it than she did!:D

tincanman99 Established Member

tincanman99

Posted
Posted

Not to boast but I live in the northeast and make the 6 digit numbers that are being bandied about. And I am not a Wall Street guy either. For what I do these numbers are quite common and I dont regard myself as highly paid. The cost of living is obscene here.

 

That being said, if a woman mentioned this in her ad it would be an automatic "next". I understand why - the $ definitely make life easier but it also implies a certain kind of arrangement ie. does she like me or my salary. I dont look down on it but it would turn me off no matter what she looked like.

 

In an ad of my own I would never post my income, ever. I was brought up to believe its tacky and gauche to do this.

 

It would be the male equivalent of saying you have to be a barbi, have big boobs and have sex like a mink gone wild.

 

You can ask for you what you think you deserve, its all a question of whether you will get it and what will be the cost.

 

Do whatever floats your boat.

Duckduckgoose Established Member

Duckduckgoose

Posted
Posted

 

I think this sums it up.

zengirl Established Member

zengirl

Posted
Posted
I'm really unsure of what the issue is...? Women and men usually want a partner who is successful. As many have said, 100k isn't rich, it's an average educated professional in a big city.

 

As, for bragging, the below made me chuckle a little ;)

 

Wasn't trying to brag----that point (about my BF making that much) led into a point that I didn't think she was asking for a salary WAY outside the norm for an educated professional. YMMV on that point, but I do meet many men who make that much, and a lot of the guys I've dated --- even as someone who doesn't seek money-minded men out consciously --- get damn close or into that range.

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