daphne Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 (edited) My #1 that I mentioned from a previous post has texted me a few times recently. I really, really wanted to not respond since he disappeared for a week, then after I responded a day or two later, didn't respond again for another 4 days. I wrote him off as an age difference casualty. But then he mentions he has something for me that Imentioned in my last text. And when my response is sweet but non committal, he goes business like and mentions someone we both know wanted me to call. Like he was only texting me for the friend. I feel like he's feeling me out, but he's really, truly blowing it. Most guys I wouldn't have even responded to his first text after he blew me off for a week. Now, he's just playing games or is completely clueless. My friend suggested he wants to be friends. PFFFT. Guys don't do that. So I doubt it. What do the guys think? He got a little cocky and thought it would work out with someone else and when it didn't he's coming back? Why am I sweating it? I think I feel really stupid for even having bothered a second time. Edited January 28, 2011 by daphne Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 A man worthy of your time and attention calls you on the phone and talks with you. It's not hard. Perhaps that's the operative phrase Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 don't bother - my male friends that just want to be my friend make a CONSISTENT effort to stay in touch and see me. he's trying to train you to expect almost nothing and see if you are willing to go along with his inconsistent crumbs. don't bother... he's out there chasing someone(s) else. guys spend their time and energy on what they ARE interested in... they make it a top priority when they are interested. Link to post Share on other sites
Author daphne Posted January 28, 2011 Author Share Posted January 28, 2011 A man worthy of your time and attention calls you on the phone and talks with you. It's not hard. Perhaps that's the operative phrase This is how I feel. He used to do that. I feel a bit like he's trying to string me along. I don't see him really wanting to be friends. I think I need to stop taking some other guys' advice to heart. Nothing happened for him to want to stop talking to me. Except perhaps meeting someone else or losing interest in pursuing it as he was. I can still be friends with him. I'm not that vested. But I'm putting him in the Do Not Rescuscitate level friend zone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author daphne Posted January 28, 2011 Author Share Posted January 28, 2011 they make it a top priority when they are interested. Yep. He was making me a top priority before. I didn't develop interest in him in teh first place because he was treating me like an option. I won't continue interest in him now that he's trying to demote me. Link to post Share on other sites
elastica Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 Probably it is not very common, but there ARE men (and women) who are totally genuine and into someone, BUT have absolutely no sense of time, or are too shy to make that call. I have actually already mentioned in another thread a few weeks ago, I know a guy who disappears for a week or two from this girl he is seeing, but it is because he is simply like that. He needs a lot of time on his own. For him, texting you after a week might be completely normal. My main point is, most interested guys will text/call sooner than that, but others are different, and it does not necessarily mean he is after someone else. And YES, some guys ARE clueless to that point!! I would never blow off a guy, just because he hasn't contacted me for a week. I mean, if he seemed okay otherwise, and I liked him. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 28, 2011 Share Posted January 28, 2011 I treated a phone like a venomous serpent when I was younger but still managed to hang onto it long enough to call a woman I was sufficiently interested in. In fact, it took extreme 'sufficiently interested' to grab it and make that call, like interest sufficient to make her a LTR prospect. #1 doesn't seem to be afraid of snakes, so other issues are at play here, IMO. venomous serpent = shy Link to post Share on other sites
Author daphne Posted January 28, 2011 Author Share Posted January 28, 2011 Probably it is not very common, but there ARE men (and women) who are totally genuine and into someone, BUT have absolutely no sense of time, or are too shy to make that call. I have actually already mentioned in another thread a few weeks ago, I know a guy who disappears for a week or two from this girl he is seeing, but it is because he is simply like that. He needs a lot of time on his own. For him, texting you after a week might be completely normal. My main point is, most interested guys will text/call sooner than that, but others are different, and it does not necessarily mean he is after someone else. And YES, some guys ARE clueless to that point!! I would never blow off a guy, just because he hasn't contacted me for a week. I mean, if he seemed okay otherwise, and I liked him. I guess I'm not that easy going. It went from medium hot to cold. He was texting every other day even when he was in Paris. To a week of silence. Our last exchange was sweet and spirited. I need a lot of down time myself. I wouldn't be clueless as to think that I could leave an interested party hanging for too long without losing them though. I am starting to think that it's less to do with him chasing others and more to do with the fact that he owns 2 business and really just doesn't have time to develop a real relationship. So be it. We can still be friends. But he won't really like it. None of my guy friends really do. It's like the seventh circle of hell where he has to listen to my guy stories and see me dress to the 9's for them. Somethiing he's not getting again. Waste of mortgage paying shoes. Link to post Share on other sites
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