chelle21689 Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 OOPS! Sorry I posted this twice on accident! I didn't see my last post go through so I reposted!!! My ex and I met age 12, friends at 14, dated at 16 for 5 1/2 years but 2.5 years long distance while he was across the country and in the Army. He will be deploying this year and leaving for training in June. We had a wonderful relationship, it was really strong. We communicated, had so many laughs, we were confidants. Then a few days ago he was crying really hard saying his feelings has changed and that he couldn't get it back. When I visited it felt like he didn't care as much, nothing felt when we kissed, or hugged. He said he did everything he could to get this back because this wasn't suppose to happen and he has no idea why it happened. Possibly that the distance and Army caught up to him...but he said it wasn't fair to stay in a relationship and string me along like that. He doesn't want me to disappear since we had such a long history and great relationship. I'm thinking of trying "no contact" for a while for us to become good friends in the future like we used to be. Then maybe one day we'll fall in love again or just stick to being friends and having each other in our life...and not disappear..
Shatter3d Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 It can happen, but you both need some time apart to clear the air, to work on yourselves and to get your own identity back. The dumper must be the one to reach out and 'win you back'...In my case I was the dumpee and I reached out after 3 weeks of NC....we still got back together but it was too easy for him, he did not have to do any work. Also, you need to take it slow...dont go from 0 - 100 % straight away like I did....all good things comes to those who wait. In the meantime, I suggest you work on yourself, get some hobbies, dont be friends with him and certainly dont answer to any of his crumbs... I got my 2nd chance and it failed due to the things I listed above....Do I want a 3rd chance? I'm not so sure anymore, I love the guy so much but he is not worthy of my love. If someone can just throw you away that easily then they are not deserving. All the best:)
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