northern_sky Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 Actually, no, she was the one talking. Remember, I'm the 'make love' guy your ex wife sounds thoroughly disgusting.
Crimson and Clover Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 Funny but I would have thought based on what OG has posted that HE is the one that needs to forgive HER. OG, are you asking how to refer to the sex you had with your BF when you discuss it with him? If so, I would stay away from "making love" unless you are actually on the verge of declaring for him. On the other hand, "screwing" sounds intentionally off-putting. I think "having sex" is probably the best neutral term for your activities. Completely agreed, with both. Good luck talking this out, Oceangirl!
A O Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 I think 90% of her relationship difficulties are a result of her not knowing what she wants, rather than her nitpicking (which other people seem to think is the main issue). Her nitpicking is a self-defense mechanism designed to stop anyone getting to close to her. She has a fear of intimacy, the result of, as yet, unresolved issues This is the first of what will become many nitpicks or in other words, many attempts to sabotage this relationship. Not unlike, and as mentioned before, her many attempts to sabotage her dating experiences. We here are simply quibbling over the symptoms rather than addressing or acknowledging, the root cause. No one here has the skill to deal with the root cause, the underlying issue that produces one hiccup after another. That is why there is only one real productive course of action we all should do here - implore her to seek professional help. Failing this, we will be on to symptom/excuse/hiccup/nit-pick/drama number...take your pick. OG is a smart woman but she only listens to what she wants to hear. And what she's been taking in over the last year or so hasn't lead to relationship nirvana thus far. Far from in it fact. Not until we all start singing from the same song sheet (implore her to seek professional help) will things change for the better for her, I believe. .
oaks Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 OG, are you asking how to refer to the sex you had with your BF when you discuss it with him? If so, I would stay away from "making love" unless you are actually on the verge of declaring for him. On the other hand, "screwing" sounds intentionally off-putting. I think "having sex" is probably the best neutral term for your activities. Best answer yet. I doubt OG will get far enough into this thread to read it, as the thread seems to have turned into a continuation of the previous thread.
Gypsy_Soul Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 :)I say 'sexin'. Remember last night when we were sexin? or You just want me to sex you all the time.
Ms. Joolie Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 I always say "make love." Period. The BF will say "make love" too but sometimes he just says he wants to f**k me. However, if I were dating a guy newly and then the moment was right to have sex... I wouldn't call it anything but naughty. Unless we said the "I love yous." Then it's back to making love.
Crimson and Clover Posted January 27, 2011 Posted January 27, 2011 "Bend over, baby. I'm bringin' sexy back." "Come on, lovah, let's go bring sexy back." The key is to say it with that hint of irony.
harmfulsweetz Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 You could have looked at the other side too. Why wasn't he more sensitive to the fact that after 5 hours of pounding in 1 night I must be really sore? He should have known and could have said "It's OK, I will finish myself up" but no, he kept going. I find it strange that noone (except for Titania) even mentioned that. I feel like the advice would be different if I posted from an anonymous user name. That's what bothers me the most, not the advice or criticism. I feel like my actions/faults are overblown and people have preconceived ideas about me and won't give me benefit of the doubt or even acknowledge any of the progress I have made. BTW he seems to have completely "forgiven" me. He texted me this morning with a very affectionate text and called me tonight and was on the phone for 30 minutes telling me that he wishes I was with him. To be fair, had he done the same to you, you wouldn't have forgiven him, you'd be crushed. If you were sore, and it took THAT long the first two times, or even the first time, why not stop? Why not say sweetly that his d*ck is so big your p*ssy needs a little rest? Giggle about it, don't crush a man because he got nervous and you were sore, and didn't think to say anything earlier. Take responsibility for your OWN actions, instead of expecting him to be a mindreader. Do you feel his pain if he stubs his toe? No. So how is he meant to know you're sore? I'm not going to claim you are selfish, but I think your actions are selfish. I think you expect so much, and when it doesn't happen like that, you fall a little. Then again, I've read/responded/lurked on many of your threads, and there is a definite pattern-you post your question, a follow up for a few pages, then drop out. And the common pattern I've noticed is that you do have a selfish pattern-is this a behaviour/protection thing or a personality thing? Don't know, but until you can learn to think of someone else, you won't have a healthy relationship. Period. In this instance, I believe there was a complete failure to communicate. You didn't communicate the fact you were tired and sore earlier, which would have stopped you making that kind of comment. Anyway, I call it f**king. Plain and simple. "make love" makes me cringe. My ex used it often, and I was screaming inside, it's just so...traditional.
carhill Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 Carhill your ex wife sounds kinky. LOL, warm wet washcloth and I hope her new boyfriend(s) appreciate her style. I do remember this one time in Australia, after a week in a tent at a music festival, that we got back to the hotel and cleaned up and I ordered up champagne that I told her, with this evil look in my eye that it's 'my time now'.
elastica Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 OG, how do you call the event when you are thinking about it, or talking about it to your best friends? Do you think there are stages, a sort of progress of the terms? Like, "make love" can be too early? Or too corny? Personally, I don't really see it as development of terms. Actually, I believe there is a term that suits a person, and that the person will usually say it that way. So, the way you say it (i.e. the way you refer to it when NOT being anywhere near doing it!), it does say something about your personality. E.g. most of the times I say "have sex", but my BF says "make love". When I say "make love", we both know that I am saying it "his way" and that there is a reason for that (e.g. I have been naughty and want to do everything his way now, or, if we are just talking, I want to be extra sweet). He is very romantic traditional, sophisticated with good manners, so maybe it has something to do with his choice of words. I, on the other hand, have never said it that way, no matter how long have been dating etc. I think this thread is quite revealing, especially because we all know she is not asking a general question. OG, just say it the way you feel you should say it, don't overanalyze.
Els Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 Harmfulsweetz, don't waste your breath, we've tried. As for sex, I dunno, we seldom ever call it anything if we're GOING to do it. Actions speak a helluva lot louder than words.
Ariadne Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 Oh, good grief, of COURSE it's a big deal! I can't imagine any man who wouldn't feel completely emasculated at the thought that his woman is counting the seconds until he's done making love to her. You are not a guy. I want to hear from a guy here who gets hurt and offended after the girl he is having sex with gets tired and looks at the clock after five hours of romping.
depplover_1980 Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 Here in the UK we sometimes refer to it as bonking or having a good bonk.
Star Gazer Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 You are not a guy. I want to hear from a guy here who gets hurt and offended after the girl he is having sex with gets tired and looks at the clock after five hours of romping. C'mom, A. There were several men in her thread who expressed how much it would upset them. She's already conceded it was hurtful. No need to debate it further.
SmileFace Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 You are not a guy. I want to hear from a guy here who gets hurt and offended after the girl he is having sex with gets tired and looks at the clock after five hours of romping. Ok think about it like this .Imagine you are telling a guy about something that happened to you at work. It is the most important thing to you at the moment. You want him to be engaged but while you are talking he is looking at the clock . How would you feel? lol -- cliche!
northern_sky Posted January 28, 2011 Posted January 28, 2011 Don't work, guys. Dante has reserved a special place in the 10th circle of Hell for OG and other women who have made a man feel bad about his sexual performance.
Nexus One Posted January 29, 2011 Posted January 29, 2011 While we're at it we might just as well come up with some creative synonyms: - horizontal tango - sinking the submarine - dipping the beef - poking the hole - stinging the ray - hammering the kitty - impaling the pink - plunging the pussy - humping the whale - brushing bellies - stuffing the goose - boning the flesh - milking the cow - grinding the wheat - bumping bodies - sowing the seed - feeding the pussy Some good ones and lesser ones in there if I may say so myself. But yet another useful addition to the internet, f*cking A.
SmileFace Posted January 29, 2011 Posted January 29, 2011 While we're at it we might just as well come up with some creative synonyms: - horizontal tango - sinking the submarine - dipping the beef(eww) - poking the hole - stinging the ray (ha!) - hammering the kitty - impaling the pink - plunging the pussy - humping the whale (um) - brushing bellies - stuffing the goose - boning the flesh - milking the cow - grinding the wheat (sounds painful) - bumping bodies - sowing the seed - feeding the pussy (Ha!) Some good ones and lesser ones in there if I may say so myself. But yet another useful addition to the internet, f*cking A. ----------------------------------------------------
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